Halloween

Written by:  Carl Ellsworth
Directed by:  Bruce Seth Green
Transcribed by:  AleXander Thompson

Copyright  1997 Alexander Thompson

                   ~~~~~~~~~~ Disclaimer ~~~~~~~~~~

I do not own the characters in this story, nor do I own any rights to 
the television show "Buffy the Vampire Slayer". They were created by 
Joss Whedon and belong to him, Mutant Enemy, Sandollar Television, Kuzui 
Enterprises, 20th Century Fox Television and the WB Television Network.

This is not a novelization or a script. It is a straightforward and dry 
transcript of the episode "Halloween". It also includes descriptions of 
the settings, action scenes and camera movements where I felt they were 
needed.

I made every effort to accurately transcribe the dialogue from this 
episode. If you notice anything that is transcribed incorrectly, please 
let me know and I will post an update.                     rev 98.10.01

This episode was originally broadcast on October 27, 1997.

                    ~~~~~~~~~~ Prologue ~~~~~~~~~~

In every generation there is a Chosen One. She alone will stand against 
the vampires, the demons and the forces of darkness. She is the Slayer.

Pop's Pumpkin Patch. The camera pans down from the sign over the stand 
past another one counting off the days until Halloween to a pumpkin on 
the ground aglow with a candle. Buffy lands flat on her back on top of 
it. She looks up at the vampire that just threw her and sees him coming 
toward her. She grabs a squash lying on the ground behind her and throws 
it at him, hitting him in the forehead. She follows it up with a 
pumpkin. The vampire staggers back a few steps. Buffy hops back to her 
feet. She pulls a stake out of her shirt and launches it at him. He 
grabs the scarecrow and pulls it over in front of him so the stake 
impales it instead. He shoves the scarecrow aside and comes at her with 
a roundhouse kick. They start fighting hand-to-hand.

Cut to a view of them through a camcorder. The 'record' light is on. Cut 
to another vampire taping the fight. He gets closer for a better view. 
Cut to the view through the camcorder. Buffy continues to fight the 
first vampire. The 'battery low' indicator starts flashing. A moment 
later the view becomes snowy, and the vampire takes the camcorder away 
from his eye. He jostles it, and it starts working again. He raises it 
back to his eye to continue recording.

The fight goes on, and a few hits later the first vampire knocks Buffy 
into the hay wagon. She holds onto the side of the wagon and kicks the 
vampire to the ground. She turns around with her back to the wagon and 
grabs the railing as the vampire gets back up. She raises her legs and 
grabs the vampire's head in a scissor hold. She twists her body and 
flips him over sideways onto the ground. Stepping away from the wagon, 
she spies the sign and then looks down at the vampire. He tries to grab 
for her legs, so she jumps over him and somersaults to the countdown 
sign. She pulls it out of the ground and swings it at his legs as he 
comes for her, knocking them out from under him. She raises the sign and 
jams the end of the signpost into his chest. The vampire bursts into 
ashes. Buffy leaves the sign stuck in the ground at its new location and 
walks out of the pumpkin patch. The second vampire lowers the camcorder 
and slowly backs away as he watches her go.

Opening credits roll. Buffy's theme plays.

                    ~~~~~~~~~~ Part 1 ~~~~~~~~~~

The Bronze. A waitress picks up a tray of cappuccino and cupcakes. The 
camera follows her as she heads to her table. She turns to her right, 
but the camera continues through the crowd over to Angel sitting alone 
at a table, looking very bored. A huge spider web and other Halloween 
decorations adorn the staircase behind him. Cordelia spots him with his 
bored look and comes over to his table. "Shy", by Epperley, is playing.

Lyrics:  I don't say much but I, but I like to sing

Cordelia:  I know. Is the Bronze so not happening? Or what? (sets down 
her drink and sits)

Angel:  Oh. Hi.

Lyrics:  Won't tell you what I'm thinking

Cordelia:  Hi!

Angel:  I'm waiting for Buffy.

Lyrics:  Just have to wait and sing

Cordelia:  Great! I'm supposed to be meeting Devon, but he's nowhere to 
be seen. It's like he thinks being in a band gives him an obligation to 
flake.

Angel smiles at the joke.

Cordelia:  Well, his loss is your incredible gain!

Cut to the door. Buffy comes in, looks around and sees Angel at the 
table with Cordelia, laughing. Cut to Angel's table.

Cordelia:  So I told Devon, 'You call that leather interior? My Barbie 
Dream Car had nicer seats!' (they both laugh)

Lyrics:  I have no skin left on my, on my fingertips

Cut to Buffy. She's upset seeing Angel there with Cordelia and turns 
around to leave. Angel notices her as she's about to go.

Angel:  Buffy?

He gets up and hurries over to her.

Angel:  Buffy!

Lyrics:  But still my heart pours out, out from my lips

Buffy:  (turns back around) Hi! I'm...

Angel:  Late.

Buffy:  Rough day at the office.

Angel reaches up to her hair and pulls out a piece of straw.

Angel:  So I see.

Lyrics:  Well I'm mute, but I'm not quite mute

Buffy:  Hey, it's a look. A seasonal look.

Lyrics:  And I say the things you want to hear

Cordelia:  (appears behind Angel) Buffy. Love the hair. It just screams 
street urchin. (leaves)

Lyrics:  I'm mute, but I'm not quite mute

Buffy:  (smiles) Know what? I need to go... (loses the smile) put a bag 
over my head. (starts to go)

Lyrics:  And I keep to myself to defend

Angel:  (grabs her arm) Don't listen to her. Please. You look fine.

Lyrics:  Yeah I'm alright

Buffy:  You're sweet. A terrible liar, but sweet.

Lyrics:  Oh now don't want to fight

Angel:  I thought we had...

Buffy:  A date. So did I. But who am I kidding?

Lyrics:  I'm an angel burning out / Oh now

Buffy:  Dates are things normal girls have. Girls who have time to think 
about nail polish and facials. You know what I think about? Ambush 
tactics. Beheading. Not exactly the stuff dreams are made of. (turns and 
goes out the door)

Cordelia:  (comes back) Cappuccino?

She holds the cup up to him. He looks at her, down at the cappuccino and 
then back at the door.

Cut to school the next day. Sign-ups are being taken for the volunteer 
safety program for Halloween. Principal Snyder takes one of the 
clipboards and looks around the hall. He grabs the next girl that walks 
by and pulls her aside.

Girl:  Hey!

Snyder:  You're volunteering.

He holds out the clipboard and pen to her. Willow, Buffy and Xander come 
in from the other hall.

Girl:  But I have to get to class.

Snyder just shrugs. The team walks past him.

Willow:  Snyder must be in charge of the volunteer safety program for 
Halloween this year.

Xander:  Note his interesting take on the volunteer concept.

Buffy:  What's the deal?

They've reached Willow's locker, and she works the combination.

Xander:  Oh, a bunch of little kids need people to take them trick-or-
treating. Sign up and get your own pack of sugar-hyped little runts for 
the night.

Buffy:  Yikes. I'll stick to vampires.

Snyder puts his hand on her shoulder, and she spins around to face him.

Snyder:  Miss Summers. Just the juvenile delinquent I've been looking 
for.

Buffy:  Principal Snyder!

Snyder:  Halloween must be a big night for you. Tossing eggs, keying 
cars, bobbing for apples, one pathetic cry for help after another. Well, 
(leads her to the sign-up table) not this year, missy.

Willow and Xander come stand behind her.

Buffy:  Gosh, I'd love to sign up, but I recently developed carpal 
tunnel syndrome, and can tragically no longer hold a flashlight.

Snyder holds up the clipboard and pen.

Snyder:  The program starts at four, the children have to be back at 
six.

Buffy reluctantly grabs the pen and clipboard and signs herself up. 
Xander thinks it's funny and smiles back at Willow. Willow has a 
concerned look on her face. Snyder holds pens out to Willow and Xander, 
too. They both look at him, begging not to be put through this. Willow 
gives in and takes the pen. Cut to another part of the hall.

Xander:  I can't believe this. We have to get dressed up and the whole 
deal?

Willow:  Snyder said costumes were mandatory.

Buffy:  Great. I was gonna stay in and veg. The one night a year things 
are supposed to be quiet for me.

Xander:  Halloween quiet? Oh, I figured it'd be a big old vamp scare-
apalooza.

They walk into the lounge.

Buffy:  Not according to Giles. He swears that tomorrow night is, like, 
dead for the undead. (the girls sit) They stay in.

Xander:  (smiling) Those wacky vampires! That's why I love 'em! They 
just keep you guessing!

He puts his satchel down on the table and heads over to the soda vending 
machine. He puts in his coins and hits a button. Nothing. He hits 
another one. Still nothing. He hits the machine in the front and on the 
side. Larry comes up to him and puts his hand on Xander's shoulder.

Larry:  Harris!

Xander:  Hey, Lar. You're lookin' Cro-Mag as usual. What can I do you 
for?

Larry:  You and Buffy, you're just friends, right?

Xander:  I like to think of it less as a friendship and more as a solid 
foundation for future bliss.

Larry:  So, she, she's not your girlfriend?

Xander:  Alas, no.

Larry looks over at Buffy as he walks around Xander.

Larry:  Do you think she'd go out with me?

He turns to face Xander with Buffy to his back now.

Xander:  Well, Lar, that's a tough question to... No. Not a chance.

Larry:  Why not? I heard some guys say she was fast.

Xander:  I hope you mean like the wind.

Larry:  Yeah, you know what I mean.

Xander:  That's my friend that you're talkin' about!

Larry:  Oh, yeah? Well, what're you gonna do about it?

Xander:  I'm gonna do what any man would do about it: (grabs Larry by 
the shirt) somethin' damn manly.

Larry smiles and laughs. He knocks Xander's hands away and grabs him by 
the shirt with his right hand. He balls his left hand into a fist and 
draws back for a punch. Buffy grabs his wrist, pulls it behind his back 
and slams his head into the vending machine. A Diet Dr Pepper rolls into 
the slot.

Buffy:  Get gone.

She pulls Larry back from the machine and shoves him away. She notices 
the soda can.

Buffy:  Ooo! Diet! (grabs the can)

Xander:  Do you know what you just did?

Buffy:  Saved you a dollar?

Xander:  No, but Larry was about to pummel me!

Buffy:  Oh, that? Forget about it! (heads back to the table)

Xander:  Oh, I'll forget about it. (follows her) In maybe fifteen, 
twenty years when my rep for being a sissy man finally fades!

Buffy:  (stops and faces him) Xander, don't you think you're...

Xander:  (interrupts) A black eye heals, Buffy, but cowardice has an 
unlimited shelf life. Oh, thanks! Thanks a lot for *your* help.

He grabs his bag from the table and walks off in a huff. Buffy moans and 
sits back down with Willow.

Buffy:  I think I just violated the guy code big time.

Willow:  Poor Xander. Boys are so fragile. Speaking of, how was your 
date last night?

Buffy:  Misfire. I was late due to unscheduled slayage. Showed up 
looking trashed.

Willow:  Was he mad?

Buffy:  Actually he was pretty unmad. Which probably had something to do 
with the fact that Cordelia was drooling in his cappuccino.

Willow:  Oh, Buffy. Angel would never fall for her act.

Buffy:  You mean that 'actually showing up, wearing a stunning outfit, 
embracing personal hygiene' act?

Willow:  You know what I mean. Uh, she's not his type.

Buffy:  Are you sure? I mean, I don't know what his type is. I've known 
him less than a year, and if you haven't noticed, he's not exactly one 
to over share.

Willow:  True. It's too bad we can't sneak a look at the Watcher diaries 
and read up on Angel. I'm sure it's full of fun facts to know and tell.

Buffy:  Yeah. It's too bad. That stuff is private.

Willow:  Also Giles keeps them in his office. In his personal files.

Buffy:  Most importantly, it would be wrong.

Cut to the library. Willow and Buffy look in through the round door 
window. They don't see Giles and give each other a look. Buffy quietly 
opens the door and goes in. She looks back at Willow, who gives her 
encouragement. The door closes and Willow looks in through the glass. 
Buffy quietly makes her way up to the counter and looks around again for 
Giles. Satisfied that he's not there she heads for his office.

Giles:  Buffy!

She spins around and sees him in the cage getting some old books.

Giles:  Excellent!

Buffy:  Nothing! Hi!

Giles:  Yes, I-I just wanted to talk to you about tomorrow night. As it 
should be, uh, calm, you might work on some new battle techniques.

Buffy:  You're beginning to scare me, Giles. You need to have some fun.

She waves to Willow to come in as he's looking down at his books. Willow 
shakes her head and mouths 'no'. Giles looks up, and Buffy pulls her 
hand back and pretends she was scratching her head.

Buffy:  You know, there's this place you can go, right, and you sit in 
the dark, and there are these moving pictures, right, and the pictures 
tell a story.

Giles:  Yes, yes, ha, ha, very droll.

Willow quietly comes in.

Giles:  I'll have you know that I have very, uh, many relaxing hobbies.

Buffy:  Such as?

Giles:  Well, um...

Buffy mouths something to Willow to goad her on.

Giles:  I enjoy cross-referencing.

Buffy:  Do you stuff your own shirts, or do you send them out?

She grabs a book from the stack he's about to take to his office and 
walks around him to draw his view away from his office door.

Buffy:  So! How come Halloween is such a big yawner? I mean, do the 
demons just hate how commercial it's become? (leafs through the book)

Giles:  (puts his books down) Um, it's interesting, ac... Not, I 
suspect, to you. (takes the book from her) What is it you're after?

Willow has made it to the office door.

Buffy:  Of course, it's of interest to me! I'm the Slayer. I need to 
know these things. You can't keep me in the dark any longer.

Willow opens the door and starts in. Giles grabs the stack of books 
again and starts to turn to his office.

Buffy:  Look at me when I talk to you!

Willow looks over at them anxiously.

Giles:  I really don't have time for these games.

Buffy:  Ms. Calendar said you were a babe.

Willow looks back again, but this time gives Buffy a look and shakes her 
head.

Giles:  She said what?

Buffy:  (meekly) Well, she said that you were a... h-hunk of burning... 
something or other. So, (exhales) whadaya think of that?

Giles:  Uh, I... (exhales) I don't, um, uh... A burning hunk of what?

Buffy:  Look. You know how disgusting it is for me to even contemplate 
you grownups having smoochies, (sees Willow come out of the office with 
a diary) but I think you should go for it.

Giles:  Buffy, I appreciate your interest, but...

Willow hurries past the counter.

Buffy:  But I've overstepped my bounds. It's none of my business, you 
know. (stammers) What was I thinking? My God! Shame, (Willow goes out 
the door) shame. I gotta go. (quickly walks out)

Giles:  (not sure what to make of it) A babe? (smirks) I can live with 
that.

Cut to the girls' bathroom. Buffy and Willow are sitting on the sinks 
and looking at a drawing of a noble woman with a tiny waist wearing a 
billowy gown.

Buffy:  Man, look at her.

Willow:  Who is she?

Buffy:  It doesn't say, but the entry's dated 1775.

Willow:  Angel was eighteen. And still human.

Buffy:  So that's the kinda girl he hung around? She's pretty coiffed.

Willow:  She looks like a noble woman or something. Which means being 
beautiful is sort of her job.

Buffy:  And clearly this girl was a workaholic. I'll never be like this.

Willow:  C'mon! She's not that pretty. I mean, look at her. She's got a 
funny... uh, waist. Look how tiny that is.

Buffy:  (sarcastically) Thank you. Now I feel better.

Willow:  (exhales) No. She's like a freak. A circus freak. Yuk.

Buffy:  (exhales) Musta been wonderful. Put on some fantabulous gown and 
go to a ball like a princess, and have horses and servants, and yet more 
gowns.

Willow:  Yeah. Still, I think I prefer being able to vote. (Buffy raises 
her brows) (smiles) Or I will when I can.

Cordelia comes into the bathroom and goes to the mirror.

Cordelia:  So, Buffy. You ran off last night and left poor little Angel 
all by his lonesome. But I did everything I could to comfort him.

Buffy:  I'll bet.

Cordelia:  (gets out her blush) So, what's his story anyway? I mean, I 
never see him around. (brushes some onto her cheeks)

Willow:  Not during the day, anyway.

Cordelia:  Oh, please. Don't tell me he still lives at home. Like, he 
has to wait for his dad to get back before he can take the car? (puts 
the blush away)

Buffy:  Cordelia, I think his parents have been dead for a couple of 
hundred years.

Cordelia:  (touches up her lip gloss) Oh, good. I mean... (faces them) 
What?

Buffy:  Angel's a vampire. I thought you knew.

Cordelia:  (turns back to the mirror) Oh, he's a vampire. (puts away the 
lip gloss) Of course! But the cuddly kind. Like a Carebear with fangs?

Willow:  It's true.

Cordelia:  (steps over to them) You know what I think? (crosses her 
arms) I just think you're trying to scare me off 'cause you're afraid of 
the competition. Look, Buffy, you may be hot stuff when it comes to 
demonology or whatever, but when it comes to dating, I'm the Slayer.

She walks out. Buffy just watches her go.

Cut to Ethan's Costume Shop. The store is full of mothers with their 
kids looking for Halloween costumes. Buffy is handling a plastic pumpkin 
when it suddenly lights up and screams. She quickly puts it back on the 
counter. Willow comes over to her.

Buffy:  What'd you get?

Willow:  A time-honored classic! (holds up a ghost costume)

Buffy:  Okay, Will, can I give you a little friendly advice?

Willow:  It's not spooky enough?

Buffy:  It's just... you're never gonna get noticed if you keep hiding. 
You're missing the whole point of Halloween.

Willow:  (smiles) Free candy?

Buffy:  It's come as you aren't night. The perfect chance for a girl to 
get sexy and wild with no repercussions.

Willow:  Oh, I don't get wild. Wild on me equals spaz.

Buffy:  Don't underestimate yourself. You've got it in you.

Willow:  Hey, Xander!

He comes up to them.

Willow:  What'd you get?

He pulls a toy military rifle out of his bag and holds it up for Willow 
to see.

Buffy:  That's not a costume.

Xander:  (gives Buffy a look, then turns to Willow) I got fatigues from 
an Army surplus at home. Call me the Two-Dollar Costume King, baby!

He smiles at Willow. She smiles back.

Buffy:  Hey, look, Xander... (he points the rifle at her) I'm... really 
sorry about this morning.

Xander:  Do you mind, Buffy? I'm trying to repress.

Buffy:  Okay, then I promise, from now on I'll let you get pummeled. 
(puts her chin on his shoulder and pouts)

Xander:  (rolls his eyes) Thank you. (Buffy smiles) Okay, y'know, 
actually I think I could've t...

Buffy is distracted by a costume. She slowly starts walking over to it.

Xander:  Hello! That was our touching reconciliation moment there.

She keeps walking over to a frilly, red, billowy 18th-century gown.

Buffy:  I'm sorry, it's just... Look at this.

Willow:  It's amazing.

Xander:  Too bulky. I prefer my women in spandex.

Ethan notices her looking at the dress and comes over to them.

Ethan:  Please, let me.

He takes the dress off of its dressmaker's mannequin.

Buffy:  Oh, i-it's...

Ethan:  Magnificent. Yes, I know. There. (holds it up to her in a 
mirror) My. Meet the hidden princess. I think we found a match. Don't 
you?

Buffy:  (looks at Ethan) Oh, uh, I-I'm sorry. There's no way I could 
ever afford this.

Ethan:  Oh, nonsense. I feel quite moved to make you a deal you can't 
refuse.

She looks back into the mirror, takes the dress from Ethan and smiles 
dreamily as she holds it up to her chin.

Cut to Spike's warehouse. He's watching the video that the vampire took 
of Buffy's fight.

Spike:  Here it comes. (watches) Rewind that. Let's see that again.

The vampire rewinds the tape as Spikes strolls around to another 
monitor.

Spike:  (chuckles) She's tricky. Baby likes to play.

The scene where she stakes the vampire with the sign replays.

Spike:  You see that? The way she stakes him with that thing? That's 
what's called resourceful. Rewind it again.

Drusilla:  (comes from the other room) Miss Edith needs her tea.

Spike:  C'mere, poodle. (holds his hand out to her)

Drusilla:  (takes his hand) Do you love my insides? The parts you can't 
see?

Spike:  Eyeballs to entrails, my sweet. That's why I've got to study 
this Slayer. Once I know her I can kill her. And once I kill her you can 
have your run of Sunnyhell. Get strong again.

Drusilla:  Don't worry. Everything's switching. Outside to inside. 
(breathes at Spike's neck) It makes her weak.

Spike:  Really? Did my pet have a vision?

Drusilla:  Do you know what I miss? Leeches.

Spike:  Come on, talk to Daddy. This thing that makes the Slayer weak? 
When is it?

Drusilla:  Tomorrow.

Spike:  Tomorrow's Halloween. Nothing happens on Halloween.

Drusilla:  Someone's come to change it all. Someone new.

Cut to the back room at Ethan's. He comes through the curtain and kneels 
before his statue of Janus. He presses his hands together and winces in 
pain. When he pulls them apart there are wounds in his palms, and blood 
flows freely from them.

Ethan:  The world that denies thee, thou inhabit.

He dabs the blood from his left hand with his right middle finger and 
smears it over his right eyelid.

Ethan:  The peace that ignores thee,...

He dabs the blood from his right hand with his left middle finger and 
smears it over his left eyelid.

Ethan:  ...thou corrupt.

He dabs the blood from his left hand with his right middle finger again 
and smears a cross onto his forehead.

Ethan:  Chaos. I remain, as ever, thy faithful, degenerate son.

The camera pans over the top of the statue from the woman's face on one 
side to the man's face on the other.

                    ~~~~~~~~~~ Part 2 ~~~~~~~~~~

Buffy's room. She's at her long mirror wearing her gown and a long, 
black wig. She puts on the second of a pair of earrings. Willow is in 
the bathroom changing.

Willow:  Where're you meeting Angel?

Buffy:  Here. After trick-or-treating. Mom's gonna be out.

Willow:  Does he know about your costume?

Buffy:  Nope. Call it a blast from his past. I'll show him I can coif 
with the best of 'em. (turns to the bathroom door) Okay, Willow, come 
out. You can't hide in there all night.

Willow:  O-okay, but, but promise you won't laugh?

Buffy:  I promise.

Willow opens the door and comes out wearing boots, a short, black 
leather skirt and a burgundy, long-sleeved, V-necked, midriff-baring 
top. She's uncomfortable, and quickly steps over to her ghost sheet and 
picks it up.

Buffy:  (smiles) Wow! You're a dish!

Willow tries to hide herself with the sheet, but Buffy takes it from her 
and tosses it aside.

Buffy:  I mean, really.

Willow is very uncomfortable and tries to cover herself with her arms.

Willow:  But this just isn't me.

Buffy:  And that's the point. (walks around Willow to show her the 
mirror) Look, Halloween is the night that not you *is* you, but not 
*you*. Y'know?

The doorbell rings.

Buffy:  Oh! That's Xander. Are you ready?

Willow:  (nervous) Yeah. O-o-okay.

Buffy:  Cool! I can't wait for the boys to go non-verbal when they see 
you! (goes to get the door)

Willow is still trying to cover herself.

Cut downstairs. Buffy comes down the stairs and opens the door for 
Xander. He enters saluting with his toy rifle in his hand.

Xander:  Private Harris reporting for... (sees Buffy in her costume) 
Buffy! Lady of Buffdom, Duchess of Buffonia, I am in awe! I completely 
renounce spandex!

Buffy:  (curtsies) Thank you, kind sir. (Xander bows) But wait till you 
see...

They turn to look up the stairs at Willow. She has put on the ghost 
sheet. It says 'BOO!' on the front in large bold letters.

Willow:  Hi.

Buffy:  ...Casper.

Xander:  Hey, Will! That's aaa fine boo you got there.

Buffy is disappointed. Xander just stares.

Cut to the school. Children are arriving in costume to be taken trick-
or-treating. Cut inside to the hall by the stairs. Buffy is standing 
there holding a clipboard, waiting for her charges. Snyder brings them 
to her.

Snyder:  This is your group, Summers. No need to speak to them. The last 
thing they need is your influence. Just bring them back in one piece and 
I won't expel you. (starts to leave)

Buffy:  (bends down to the kids) Hi.

Snyder:  Ah, ah!

Buffy straightens back up and rolls her eyes. Cut to Xander in his 
soldier outfit. Larry comes by dressed as a pirate.

Larry:  Where's your bodyguard, Harris? Curling her hair?

He jumps at Xander, making him flinch. He laughs in Xander's face and 
goes. Xander points his rifle at him, but then dismisses him.

Cut to Oz checking his guitar at his locker. Cordelia comes into the 
hall wearing a tight-fitting catsuit and walks up to him.

Cordelia:  Oz. Oz.

Oz:  (looks up at her) Hey, Cordelia. Jeez, you're like a great big cat.

Cordelia:  It's my costume. Are you guys playing tonight?

Oz:  Yeah, at the Shelter Club.

Cordelia:  Is Mr. I'm-the-lead-singer-I'm-so-great-I-don't-have-to-show-
up-for-my-date-or-even-call gonna be there?

Oz:  Yeah, y'know, he's just going by 'Devon' now.

Cordelia:  Well, you can tell him that I don't care, and that I didn't 
even mention it. And that I didn't even see you. So that's just fine.

Oz:  So, what do I tell him?

Cordelia:  Nothing! Jeez! Get with the program. (walks off in a huff)

Oz:  (sarcastically) Why can't I meet a nice girl like that?

Willow comes down the hall in her ghost sheet. Oz turns around and bumps 
right into her.

Oz:  Oh! I'm sorry.

Willow:  Sorry.

Oz:  I'm sorry.

Willow:  Sorry.

Oz:  Sorry.

Oz and Willow continue down the hall on their separate ways.

Cut to Xander briefing his group. He's got them all lined up and 
standing at attention.

Xander:  Okay, on sleazing extra candy: tears are key. Tears will 
normally get you the double-bagger. You can also try the old 'you missed 
me' routine, but it's risky. Only go there for chocolate. Understood?

They all nod their heads.

Xander:  Okay, troops.

He turns and faces down the hall. The kids follow his lead.

Xander:  Let's move out.

Cut to the streets. A student dressed as a vampire is escorting a group 
of kids. They walk by Buffy's group coming back from a house. Buffy 
crouches down to see what they got.

Buffy:  What did Mrs. Davis give you?

They all pull out toothbrushes.

Buffy:  She must be stopped. Let's hit one more house. (gets up) We 
still have a few more minutes before I need to get you back.

Cut to the back room at Ethan's. He weaves a spell in Latin.

Ethan:  Janus, evoco vestram animam. Exaudi meam causam. Carpe noctem 
pro consilio vestro. Veni, appare et nobis monstra quod est infinita 
potestas.

Translation:  Janus, I invoke your spirit. Hear my plea. Seize the night 
for your own reason. Come, appear and show to us that which is infinite 
power.

Cut to a house. Willow follows her charges along the porch to the door.

Willow:  C'mon, guys.

One of the kids wearing a green monster mask on his head rings the bell 
and steps back. An old lady answers the door. The kid with the mask 
pulls it down over his face.

Kids:  Trick-or-treat!

Lady:  Oh, my goodness, aren't you adorable!

Cut to Ethan's.

Ethan:  Persona se corpum et sanguium commutandum est. Vestra sancta 
praesentia concrescet viscera. Janus! Sume noctem!

Translation:  The mask transforms itself into flesh and blood. Your holy 
presence curdles the heart. Janus! Take the night!

Cut to Buffy. A wind begins to blow. She senses something isn't quite 
right.

Cut to the Lady with Willow's kids. She looks into her empty candy 
bucket.

Lady:  Oh, dear! Am I all out?

Cut to Ethan's. He raises his head.

Ethan:  Showtime!

Cut to the Lady's house.

Lady:  I could've sworn I had more candy.

The kid wearing a red rubber cap with horns morphs into a horned, red 
skinned monster.

Lady:  I'm sorry, mister monster. (bends down) Maybe I...

The kid with the green mask has changed into a monster also, and grabs 
the lady by the neck and begins to choke her. The other kids scream and 
run away.

Willow:  No! Let her go!

The red monster attacks the green one, and he lets go of the lady. The 
two monsters are at each other's throats.

Willow:  Stop! What're you doing?!

The lady runs into the house and slams the door shut.

Willow:  Stop! Hey!

The two monsters keep fighting. Willow suddenly starts to feel weak.

Cut to the street. Xander is standing there watching all the parents and 
children running around him. Things are being thrown and windows are 
being broken.

Cut to Willow. She staggers a bit as the two monsters keep fighting.

Willow:  Ohmigod! Can't breathe...

She collapses to the floor.

Cut to Xander. He jerks back like he's just been hit by something. He 
bends over slightly, looks down and lowers his toy rifle. Slowly he 
straightens back up and surveys the scene around him. He raises his 
rifle again and cradles the fully automatic M-16 in his hands. He 
shoulders the weapon and spins around, scanning for a target. When he 
doesn't immediately find one, he takes the rifle from his shoulder and 
holds it ready.

Cut to Willow on the porch. She gets up out of her body and looks down 
at it. She's only wearing her sexy outfit now without the sheet.

Willow:  Ohmigod! I'm a real ghost!

She hears automatic rifle fire and turns to look.

Willow:  Xander?

She runs out into the street and comes up behind him.

Willow:  Xander!

He spins around and points his M-16 at her.

Willow:  It's me, Willow!

Xander:  I don't know any Willow.

Willow:  Xander, quite messing around. This is no time for jokes.

Xander:  What the hell's going on here?

Willow:  You don't know me?

Xander:  (lifts the rifle away from her) Lady, I suggest you find cover. 
(starts walking past her)

Willow:  (gets in front of him) No, wait!

Xander walks right through her. They're both surprised by the 
experience.

Willow:  Oh!

Xander turns around and points his weapon at her again. She turns to 
face him.

Xander:  What are you?

Willow:  Xander, listen to me. I'm on your side, I swear! Something 
crazy is happening. I was dressed as a ghost for Halloween, a-and now I 
am a ghost. And you were supposed to be a soldier, and now I, I-I guess 
you're a real soldier.

Xander:  You expect me to believe that?

A monster appears across the street, growling. Xander points his rifle 
at it. It runs away. Willow jumps in front of him.

Willow:  No! No guns! That's still a little kid in there!

Xander:  Step out of the way!

Willow:  No guns! That's an order!

He lowers the rifle.

Willow:  We just need to find... (sees her) Buffy!

She runs across the street over to Buffy. Xander follows.

Willow:  Buffy! Are you okay?

The monster is back with a friend, and they both roar as they approach. 
Xander shoulders his M-16 again and takes aim.

Xander:  This could be a situation.

Willow:  Buffy, what do we do?

Buffy faints and falls to the ground.

                    ~~~~~~~~~~ Part 3 ~~~~~~~~~~

The street. Xander fires off a couple dozen rounds at the approaching 
monsters. They turn and run. Xander lowers his rifle. The camera pans 
down from him to Willow kneeling beside Buffy, who's lying against a 
tree.

Willow:  Buffy, are you alright?

Buffy:  What?

Xander:  Are you hurt?

Willow:  Buffy, are you hurt?

Buffy:  (sits up) Buffy?

Willow:  (to Xander) She's not Buffy.

Xander:  Who's Buffy?

Willow:  Oh, this is fun. (to Buffy) What year is this?

Xander takes Buffy's hand and helps her up.

Buffy:  1775, I believe. (confused and hyperventilating) I-I don't 
understand. Who are you?

Willow:  We're friends.

Buffy:  F-friends of whom? Y-your dress... Everything is strange! How 
did I come to be here?

Willow:  Breathe, okay, breathe. You're gonna faint again. (to Xander) 
How are we supposed to get through this without the Slayer?

Xander:  What's a Slayer?

A monster comes around the tree behind Buffy and roars, fangs bared and 
claws raised to attack. Buffy screams and backs off. Xander jumps in and 
whacks the monster across the face with the butt of his rifle, knocking 
it down and out.

Xander:  I suggest we get inside before we come across anything...

Buffy:  (screaming) A DEMON! A DEMON! (gets behind Xander) A DEMON!

A sport utility vehicle comes driving down the street with its 
headlights on.

Willow:  That's not a demon. It's a car.

Buffy:  What does it want?

Xander:  Is this woman insane?

Willow:  She's never seen a car.

Xander:  She's never seen a car?

Willow:  She's from the past.

Xander:  And you're a ghost.

Willow:  Yes! Now let's get inside.

Xander:  I just want you to know that I'm taking a lot on faith here. 
Where do we go?

Willow:  (thinks) Where's the closest... We can go to a friend's.

Cut to the Summers house. Cut to the kitchen. Xander opens the door and 
scans the room.

Xander:  All clear!

Willow:  (walks in) Hello? Mrs. Summers? (no response) Good, she's gone.

Xander closes the door.

Buffy:  Where are we?

Willow:  Your place. Now we just need to...

There's a banging at the front door. Xander goes to investigate, and 
Willow and Buffy follow.

Willow:  Don't open it!

Xander:  Could be a civilian.

Willow:  Or a mini demon.

Buffy notices a picture on a table and goes over to look. She picks it 
up, and sees it's of her wearing a spaghetti strap top. She turns around 
as Willow comes over to her.

Buffy:  This... this could be me.

Willow:  It *is* you. Buffy, can't you remember at all?

Buffy:  No! I, I don't understand any of this! Uh, uh, th... This is 
some other girl! (puts the picture back) I would never wear this, that 
low apparel, and I don't like this place, and I don't like you, and I 
just wanna go home!

Willow:  You *are* home!

Buffy is practically in tears. Willow turns back to Xander.

Willow:  She couldn't've dressed up like Xena?

Xander scans the outside through one of the small windows in the door. 
He moves away just as a monster punches through the glass and reaches 
for him. It pulls its hand back as Xander raises his M-16.

Willow:  Not a civilian!

Xander:  Affirmative! (takes aims through the broken portal)

Willow:  Hey! What did we say?!

Xander lets loose a volley of bullets. Willow winces at the noise. Buffy 
bows her head and covers her ears. Xander rolls away from the door when 
he's finished his burst.

Xander:  Big noise scare monster, remember?

Willow:  Got it.

They hear a woman screaming outside. Xander looks out again.

Xander:  Damn it!

He opens the door and goes out to rescue whomever it is, pulling the 
door closed behind him. Buffy runs up to Willow.

Buffy:  Surely he'll not desert us!

Willow:  (shakes her head) Whatever.

She rolls her eyes and heads into the living room. Buffy is wide-eyed 
with fear.

Cut outside. Cordelia screams as she runs from a sasquatch.

Cordelia:  Somebody help me!

She looks back at the monster chasing her and screams. When she turns 
back around again she runs into Xander.

Cordelia:  Xander! Help me!

Xander:  Come inside!

He takes her by her elbow and leads her to the house. Cut inside. Willow 
watches through the window. Xander and Cordelia quickly come in through 
the door.

Willow:  Cordelia!

Cordelia:  Wait a... What's going on?

Willow:  Okay, your name is Cordelia, you're not a cat, you're in high 
school, and we're your friends. Well, sort of.

Cordelia:  That's nice, Willow. And you went mental when?

Willow:  You know us?

Cordelia:  Yeah. Lucky me. What's with the name game?

Willow:  A lot's going on.

Cordelia:  No kidding. I was just attacked by Jo-Jo, the Dog-Faced Boy. 
Look at my costume! (shows the torn sleeve) Do you really think that 
Partytown's gonna give me my deposit back? Not on the likely.

Xander has taken his shirt off and puts it around her shoulders.

Xander:  Here.

Cordelia:  Thanks.

Willow:  Okay. You guys stay here while I get some help. If something 
tries to get in, just fight it off.

Buffy:  Well, i-it's not our place to fight. Uh, surely some men will 
protect us.

Cordelia:  What's that riff?

Willow:  I-it's like amnesia, okay? They don't know who they are. Just 
sit tight. (starts to go)

Cordelia:  Who died and made her the boss?

Willow walks through the wall behind Cordelia. Buffy stares in wide-eyed 
amazement.

Cut outside. Several monsters are chasing people down the street past 
Spike.

Spike:  Well! This is just... neat!

Cut inside. Xander brings a chair over from the dining room.

Xander:  (to Cordelia) You! Check upstairs. Make sure everything's 
locked up.

He positions the chair to help hold the table they've upended against 
the window in place. Cordelia heads upstairs.

Buffy:  Surely there's somewhere we can go. A safe haven.

Xander:  Lady said stay put.

Buffy:  You would take orders from a woman? A-are you feeble in some 
way?

Xander:  Ma'am, in the Army we have a saying: sit down and shut the...

He sees a picture on the floor

Xander:  Whoa!

He picks it up. It's of the three of them.

Xander:  She must be right. We must have some kind of amnesia.

Buffy:  I don't know what that is, but I'm certain I don't have it. I 
bathe quite often!

Xander:  How do you explain this?

Buffy:  I don't! I was brought up a proper lady. I-I wasn't meant to 
understand things. I'm just meant to look pretty, and then someone nice 
will marry me. Possibly a Baron.

Xander:  This ain't no tea party, princess. Sooner or later you're gonna 
have to fight!

Buffy:  Fight these low creatures? (snotty) I'd sooner die. (crosses her 
arms)

Xander:  Then you'll die.

Angel comes in from the kitchen.

Angel:  Oh, good! You guys are alright. It's total chaos out there.

They both look at him.

Buffy and Xander:  Who are you?

Cut to the library. Giles is going through a stack of cards he's pulled 
from the card catalog. He hears yelling and sirens outside and looks up, 
wondering what's going on. He sees Willow come though the wall and jumps 
in complete surprise, letting the cards fly all over the place.

Giles:  Jeez!

Willow:  Hi.

Giles:  (calms down a bit) Uh... ah... (speechless) huh...

Cut to Buffy's house.

Angel:  Okay, somebody wanna fill me in?

Xander:  Do you live here?

Angel:  No, and you know that. Buffy, (she jumps) I'm lost here. You... 
What's up with your hair?

Cordelia:  (comes back in) They don't know who they are, everyone's 
turned into a monster, it's a whole big thing. (smiles) How are you?

The lights go out. Buffy grabs Cordelia in fright.

Cordelia:  Do you mind?

Buffy lets go of her.

Xander:  (to Angel) You take the princess and secure the kitchen. 
Catwoman, you're with me.

Cordelia follows Xander as Angel heads for the kitchen.

Buffy:  But I don't wanna go with you! I-I like the man with the musket!

Angel:  (takes her arm) C'mon.

Buffy:  Do you have a musket?

They go into the kitchen. Angel sees that the door is open.

Angel:  I didn't leave that open.

He quietly moves toward the door as he looks around for an intruder. He 
closes the door. The basement door behind Buffy opens, and a vampire 
attacks her. She tries to push the door closed on him. Angel grabs the 
vampire and wrestles him to the floor. It's the student escort in a 
vampire costume.

Angel:  A stake!

Buffy:  A what?

Angel:  Get me a stake!

Buffy looks around and grabs a knife she sees on the counter.

Angel:  Hurry up!

He turns to look what's keeping her and has his game face on. Buffy 
screams at the top of her lungs. She runs for the door.

Angel:  Buffy, no!

She opens the door and runs out.

Cut to the library. Giles is in the cage getting a stack of old papers. 
He blows the dust off of them and comes back out. Willow is looking at a 
book.

Willow:  I don't even know what I'm looking for. Plus I can't turn the 
page.

Giles:  Well, alright, l-let's, let's, let's review. (sets the papers on 
the table) Um, so everybody became, uh, whatever they were masquerading 
as.

Willow:  Right. Xander was a soldier and Buffy was an 18th-century girl.

Giles:  (confused) A-and, uh, your, your costume?

Willow:  I'm a ghost!

Giles:  Yes. Um... w, uh, uh, uh, the ghost of what, exactly?

Willow:  (covers her midriff with her arms) Well, this is nothing. You 
should see what Cordelia was wearing. A-a, a unitard with cat things, 
like ears and stuff.

Giles:  Good heavens. Uh, sh-sh-she became an actual feline?

Willow:  No! She was the same old Cordelia. Just in a cat costume.

Giles:  She didn't change.

Willow:  No. Hold on... Partytown. She told us she got her outfit from 
Partytown.

Giles:  A-a-and everyone who changed, they, they, they, they acquired 
their costumes where?

Willow:  We all got ours at a new place. Ethan's.

Cut to an alley. Buffy runs between all the trash that's piled up there.

Cut to the street. Cordelia, Angel and Xander are looking for Buffy. 
Xander has his rifle raised and ready. The camera follows them as they 
walk.

Xander:  Are you sure she came this way?

Angel:  No.

Cordelia:  She'll be okay.

Angel:  *Buffy* would be okay. Whoever she is now, she's helpless. 
C'mon!

The camera moves behind a tree where Spike is hiding and overhearing 
their conversation. He turns to the child monsters Willow was 
chaperoning.

Spike:  Do you hear that, my friends?

The monsters nod and growl.

Spike:  Somewhere out here is the (cut to Buffy running down the alley) 
*tenderest* meat you've *ever* tasted, and all *we* have to do is find 
her first!

Buffy has stopped running and leans against a crate. She sniffs and 
looks around, frightened.

                    ~~~~~~~~~~ Part 4 ~~~~~~~~~~

The alley. Buffy looks around, trying to decide what to do. She lifts 
her skirt a bit and starts to walk. She turns around to look behind her 
and takes a few steps backward. When she turns back around Larry, who 
has turned into a pirate, startles her. He smiles widely at her, showing 
his rotten teeth.

Larry:  Pretty, pretty!

Buffy tries to run away, and Larry gives chase.

Cut to Ethan's Costume Shop. Giles looks around as he and Willow come 
in.

Giles:  Hello! Anyone home?

Willow sees the curtain to the back room partially open.

Willow:  Giles...

They slowly go in and see the statue of Janus there. Its eyes glow 
green.

Giles:  Janus. Roman mythical god.

Willow:  What does this mean?

Giles:  Primarily the division of self. Male and female, light and dark.

Ethan:  (appears) Chunky and creamy. Oh, no, sorry, that's peanut 
butter.

Giles stares at Ethan as though he's seen a ghost.

Giles:  Willow, get out of here, now.

Willow:  But...

Giles:  Now!

She obeys him and goes.

Giles:  Hello, Ethan.

Ethan:  Hello, Ripper.

Cut to the alley. Buffy backs away from Larry. She turns to run, but 
trips and falls. Her gown billows out around her. Larry grabs her as she 
tries to get up and shoves her against a crate. He pushes her hair away 
from her frightened face and moves in to kiss her. Xander comes running 
and tackles Larry down to the pavement. He gets up and pulls Larry up 
and into a metal warehouse door. He punches him in the face and gut. 
Larry pushes him off and into the opposite alley wall and punches him 
back in the gut. Xander grabs Larry's arm and pulls it behind his back, 
forcing him to bend over, and knees him in the stomach. Cordelia arrives 
behind Buffy with Angel.

Cordelia:  Buffy! Are you okay?

Buffy sees Angel, yelps and cowers behind a box.

Cordelia:  What's your deal? Take a pill!

Larry attacks Xander with his pirate's sword. Xander sidesteps him, 
grabs him by the wrist and twists his arm around, making him drop the 
sword. He lifts Larry back up and punches him, sending him sprawling 
into a pile of trash.

Buffy:  He's, he's a vampire!

Cordelia:  (to Angel) She's got this thing where she thinks... 
(exasperated) Uhhh, forget it. (to Buffy) It's okay. Angel is a good 
vampire. He would never hurt you.

Buffy:  (slowly stands up) Really?

Cordelia:  Absolutely. He's our friend.

Angel heads over to Xander fighting Larry. Xander punches Larry, sending 
him into the pile of trash and a stack of boxes again. Several boxes 
fall off of the top and onto Larry. He is knocked out cold.

Xander:  (to Angel) It's strange, but beating up that pirate gave me a 
weird sense of closure.

Willow comes running down the alley from the other end.

Willow:  Guys!

Angel:  Willow!

Willow:  Guys, you gotta get inside.

She looks back and they see Spike and his monster gang coming.

Xander:  We need a triage!

Angel:  (points the other way) This way! Find an open warehouse.

Xander turns and picks up his rifle.

Xander:  Ladies, we're on the move!

He quickly heads down the alley. Cordelia and Willow follow him. Angel 
lifts Buffy and carries her away. Spike and the monsters walk after them 
at a quick, deliberate pace.

Cut to Ethan's.

Ethan:  What? No hug? Aren't you pleased to see your old mate, Rupert?

Giles:  I'm just surprised I didn't guess it was you. This Halloween 
stunt stinks of Ethan Rayne.

Ethan:  Yes, it does, doesn't it? Don't wish to blow my own trumpet, but 
it's genius. The very embodiment of 'be careful what you wish for'.

Giles:  It's sick, brutal, and it harms the innocent.

Ethan:  Oh, and we all know that you are the champion of innocents and 
all things pure and good, Rupert. It's quite a little act you've got 
going here, old man.

Giles:  It's no act. It's who I am.

Ethan:  Who you are? The Watcher, sniveling, tweed-clad guardian of the 
Slayer and her kin? I think not. I know who you are, Rupert, and I know 
what you're capable of. (considers) But they don't, do they? They have 
no idea where you come from.

Giles:  Break the spell, Ethan. Then leave this place and never come 
back.

Ethan:  Why should I? What's in the bargain for me?

Giles:  You get to live.

Ethan:  Oh, Rupert, you're scaring me.

Giles punches him in the gut with a left, making him double over, and 
follows up with a right to the face.

Cut to the alley. Angel has gotten ahead of the others and finds an open 
warehouse.

Angel:  Over here!

Xander pushes the door aside, and they all hurry in.

Xander:  Check if there are any other ways in!

He slides the door closed again as Angel sets Buffy back down on her 
feet next to Cordelia.

Angel:  Just stay here.

The monsters arrive and start pounding on the door from outside. Xander 
picks up a large grate and sets it in front of the door on top of some 
barrels he's already moved into place. Buffy is holding on tightly to 
Cordelia.

Cordelia:  Oh, faboo, more clinging.

Xander picks up another grate and sets it behind the first one as the 
monsters get the door open. They pound against it as he tries to hold it 
in place.

Xander:  GOOOOO!

They all start running again, and Xander follows when he can no longer 
hold the grating against the monsters. The grates fall to the floor as 
two monsters come in and push the barrels aside. Spike follows them in 
and looks around. He leads the monsters off after them.

Cut to Ethan's. Ethan is on the floor, severely beaten up.

Ethan:  And you said the Ripper was long gone.

Giles:  Tell me how to stop the spell.

Ethan:  Say 'pretty please'.

Giles kicks him hard in the kidney, and he yells out in pain.

Cut to the warehouse. Spike has caught up with them, and the monsters 
hold Xander and Angel. He slowly closes in on Buffy as she backs away, 
trembling.

Spike:  Look at you. Shaking. Terrified. Alone. Lost little lamb.

Buffy has backed up against a crate and can't go any further. Spike 
slaps her across the face with the back of his hand.

Spike:  I love it.

Angel struggles with the two monsters holding him.

Angel:  Buffy!

Spike puts his left hand around her throat and bends her backward onto 
the crate. He strokes her forehead with his right hand. Xander struggles 
with his two captors. Spike grabs Buffy's hair and closes in for the 
bite.

Cut to Ethan's. Giles kicks him again.

Giles:  Now, tell me how to stop the spell.

Ethan:  Janus. Break its statue.

Giles grabs the statue and lifts it over his head to smash it.

Cut to the warehouse. Xander gets free of the monsters and punches one 
in the face, the other in the gut, and then shoves the second monster 
into the first. Spike closes in on Buffy. Xander turns his attention to 
Spike.

Willow:  Now that guy you *can* shoot.

Xander grabs his M-16.

Cut to Ethan's. Giles throws the statue hard to the floor, smashing it 
into tiny pieces.

Cut to the warehouse. Xander shoulders his toy rifle.

Xander:  What the...

The monsters have all turned back into children and student escorts. The 
kids are frightened, and begin to cry and complain.

Kid:  I'm scared! I want my mommy!

Spike looks back at them and straightens up. He pulls on Buffy's hair to 
pull her up and finds he just has a wig in his hands. He looks at Buffy. 
She gets up off of the crate and smiles at him.

Buffy:  Hi, honey. I'm home.

She punches him in the gut, twice in the face, and kicks him in the 
chest, making him stagger back into a set of mobile stairs. He grabs a 
length of pipe that's leaning there and swings it at her. She catches 
the end of it and pulls him around and into the crate he had her 
against. She uses the pipe like a quarterstaff and swings it into his 
jaw and jabs him in the stomach. He doubles over in pain.

Buffy:  You know what? It's good to be me.

She brings the pipe up into his chin from underneath. He flies back onto 
the crate, then slides off onto the floor.

Cut to Ethan's. Giles looks behind him and sees that Ethan has gone.

Cut to the warehouse. Buffy is through fighting. Spike gets up and 
growls at her, then makes a hasty retreat. Buffy drops the pipe and 
turns to the others. Xander comes over to her.

Xander:  Hey, Buff. Welcome back.

Buffy:  Yeah! You, too.

Cordelia:  You guys remember what happened?

Xander:  It was way creepy. It's like I was there, but I couldn't get 
out.

Cordelia:  Yeah, I know the feeling. This outfit's totally skintight.

She looks up at Angel as he comes over to Buffy.

Angel:  You okay?

Buffy:  Yeah.

He puts his arm around her shoulders and leads her away.

Cordelia:  Hello?! It felt like I was talking, my lips were moving 
and...

Xander:  (shakes his head). Give it up, Cordy. You're never gonna get 
between those two. Believe me, I know.

Cordelia:  Well, (indicates the kids) I guess you better get them back 
to their parents.

Xander:  (looks around) Yeah, everybody seems to... Where's Willow?

Cut to the house where Willow collapsed. The camera pans from the 
pumpkin over to her. She wakes and gets up, pulling the ghost sheet off. 
She's a bit out of breath. She realizes how she's dressed and starts to 
put the sheet back on, but thinks better of it and throws it into a 
trashcan as she walks off the porch.

Cut to the street. Oz is driving along in his van. He pulls to a stop at 
an intersection and sees Willow cross the street in front of him. He 
watches her as she continues away. "How She Died", by Treble Charger, 
plays on the van's stereo.

Lyrics:  You got the best of me / And, gee, you took so long / The 
things you put me through / Seemed to be so wrong

Oz:  Who is that girl?

Lyrics:  You took your...

Cut to the Summers house. Cut to Buffy's room. Angel is lounging on her 
bed. She opens the door and comes in wearing a tank top and sweatpants.

Buffy:  Tada. Just little old 20th-century me.

Angel:  Sure you're okay?

Buffy:  I'll live.

She walks over to him, and he sits up on the bed.

Angel:  I don't get it, Buffy. Why'd you think I'd like you better 
dressed that way?

Buffy:  (sits next to him) I just wanted to be a real girl for once. The 
kind of fancy girl you liked when you were my age.

Angel:  (ironically) Oh, ho.

Buffy:  What?

Angel:  I hated the girls back then. Especially the noble women.

Buffy:  (nods) You did.

Angel:  They were just incredibly dull. Simpering morons, the lot of 
them. I always wished I could meet someone... exciting. (looks her in 
the eyes) Interesting.

Buffy:  Really? Interesting how?

Angel:  You know how.

Buffy:  Still, I had a really hard day. You should probably tell me.

Angel:  (smiles and draws nearer) You're right. I should.

Buffy:  (gets closer) Definitely.

They kiss gently yet passionately. She cradles his face in her hands.

Cut to Ethan's. The place has been emptied. Giles comes in the front 
door. He walks over to the main counter and looks around. He sees a note 
propped up on another counter and goes over to it. He picks it up and 
reads it.

Note:  Be seeing you...

[an error occurred while processing this directive]