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Buffy Summers surprises her friends with her S.A.T. scores, which are a combined total of 1430. While everybody is fairly excited by this news, Buffy herself is more concerned with the fact that she may have to consider her future more seriously.
Later that night, a car runs over the welcome sign at Sunnydale’s city limits. Completely drunk, a familiar figure tumbles out of the driver’s side door: Spike. Spike heads to the burnt-out factory where he originally stayed with Drusilla before Giles’ invasion forced them to leave.
Spike laments over his recent break-up with Dru as he smashes one of her old dolls. The next morning, Xander convinces Cordelia to join Oz and Willow on a double date at the bowling alley.
Xander notices that Cordy has taped pictures of herself and Xander, along with Oz and Willow, to the inside of her locker door. After confirming the plans, Oz follows Willow to her locker and gives her a pez dispenser with a witch’s head on it as an impromptu gift.
Overcome with guilt, Willow confronts Xander outside and tries to convince him that the double date is a bad idea. In the library, Giles admires Buffy’s S.A.T. scores while he finishes packing for a retreat at Breaker’s Woods.
Buffy mentions her mother’s enthusiasm and encouragement to apply to major colleges across the country. Giles agrees that Buffy should take advantage of this opportunity, while Faith could keep an eye on Sunnydale.
Elsewhere, the deputy mayor informs Mayor Wilkins that Spike is back in town. Mayor Wilkins agrees with his suggestion that they get Mr. Trick to send a vampire committee to take care of Spike. Later, after school, Buffy and Joyce discuss college plans.
Joyce continuously mentions out-of-state universities. Meanwhile, Spike goes to the Crawford Street mansion and spies on Angel, who is reading a book inside. Still drunk, Spike passes out on the floor of the garden.
As the sun rises the next morning, Spike is abruptly woken up by the sight and pain of his burning hand, which has been ignited by the sunlight. He goes to a local magic shop in search of a curse to cast on Angel. Spike hides as Willow enters.
He looks on as Willow buys a few ingredients for a de-lusting spell, which she hopes will put an end to her affair with Xander. After Willow leaves, Spike feeds on the shopkeeper and formulates a new plan to get what he wants.
At the mansion, Angel tells Buffy that she should look into college. This causes Buffy to leave early. Later that night, Xander finds Willow working on some sort of experiment in the science lab.
While they wait for Cordelia and Oz to meet them there for the double date, Xander realizes that Willow is actually performing a spell. She tells him about the nature of the spell, and Xander is not pleased with Willow’s preferred method of dealing with their situation.
Suddenly, Spike appears to kidnap Willow. While Xander fights Spike, Willow attempts to hit the vampire with a heavy object. Spike grabs it out of Willow’s hands and strikes Xander directly in the head, knocking him out.
Willow and Xander are then brought to the factory and locked in the basement. While Xander lays on a bed, unconscious and bloody, Spike demands Willow to perform a love spell that will bring Drusilla back to him.
Willow tells Spike that she still needs a few additional ingredients and the right spell book. Back at Sunnydale High, Cordy and Oz barge into the library where Buffy is training.
Worried about Xander and Willow’s absence, they take Buffy to the science lab and show her the aftermath of the fight. Buffy sends them to find Giles at his retreat while she goes back to the library to properly equip herself for the search.
Before Buffy can enter the bookcage, the phone rings. It’s Joyce, and as Buffy listens, Spike enters the Summers’ home. As soon as Buffy hears the familiar voice, she drops the phone and runs home as fast as she can.
Joyce makes a couple cups of coffee while Spike tells her his sob story about what happened between himself and Drusilla. Outside, Angel approaches the house.
He sees Spike sitting at the kitchen counter with Joyce and tries to run into the house, but can’t do so without an invitation. Joyce is terrified to see Angel again, unaware that the real enemy is standing right behind her.
Distracted, Spike doesn’t even notice Buffy’s entrance as she grabs him from behind and pins him to the counter. Joyce watches in confusion while Buffy invites Angel into the house to help with Spike.
Spike tells them what he’s done with Willow and Xander, but he doesn’t say where they are. Buffy and Angel reluctantly agree to help Spike get what he needs for the love spell in exchange for her friends’ safety.
Meanwhile, Oz picks up Willow’s scent, so he cancels the drive to Breaker’s Woods and tries to find Willow and Xander instead. Cordelia is not too comfortable with the fact that Oz still has a few latent werewolf abilities even when it’s not that time of the month.
Buffy and Angel follow Spike to the magic shop to get the ingredients. While there, Spike mocks Buffy and Angel’s attempt to be nothing more than friends. Spike insists that they will forever be in love with each other, just like he is with Dru.
At the factory, Xander finally comes to and learns from Willow everything that’s happened. Realizing that their situation is seemingly hopeless, Xander and Willow lay on the bed and kiss, unaware of the fact that Oz and Cordelia have just arrived to rescue them.
Nobody can believe what they’re seeing, and Cordy takes it the hardest. As she runs back up the stairs, one of the deteriorated steps crumbles. Cordy falls through the hole to the hard floor below.
When Xander looks down through the hole, he sees that Cordy is impaled on a steel rod, which is sticking up from her torso. After gathering all of the ingredients, Spike, Buffy, and Angel run into a large group of vampires outside of the magic shop.
One of the group’s head vampires, Lenny, is not too pleased with Spike’s return to Sunnydale. A huge battle erupts on the street. Outnumbered, the three retreat into the magic shop and seal off the entrances.
They miss one of the doors in the back, which is soon opened by the invading vampires. As the battle spills into the magic shop, Spike drives a stake through Lenny’s heart, reducing him to dust.
More vampires bust through the window, but they are quickly thwarted off by the vials of holy water thrown by Buffy and Angel. Spike is thoroughly satisfied with the emotional rush from the battle, and decides to forget about the love spell and win Drusilla back by being his old self.
Spike tells them that Willow and Xander are at the factory, then leaves. Meanwhile, at the factory, Xander climbs down to the injured Cordelia while Oz leaves to get help. Luckily, none of Cordy’s organs were punctured by the rod, but her distress over Xander’s betrayal is beyond repair.
While Buffy comforts Willow about the whole situation, Xander tries his own luck at the hospital where Cordy is recovering. He brings her flowers and tries to apologize, but Cordy simply tells Xander to stay away.
Later, Buffy goes to the mansion and tells Angel that she won’t visit him anymore. Buffy can’t get out of her mind what Spike said about the two of them, so she decides to break off her contact with Angel.
While everybody somberly reflects to themselves about what happened during the past few days, a jubilant Spike leaves Sunnydale once again.
EXT. SCHOOL FRONT STEPS – DAY
Xander and Willow are sitting on the front steps, reading their SAT scores. Willow is entirely
This is a nightmare. This is…
my world is spinning.
Will, it’s not that bad. Really.
Seven-forty verbal? That’s.. I’m
pathetic. Illiterate! I’m Cletus
the slack-jawed yokel.
That’s right. And the fact that your
seven forty verbal closely resembles
my combined scores in no way
compromises your position as the
I just… where did I go wrong?
He puts a hand on her shoulder, comfortingly, as Cordelia and Oz walk up from behind them.
You did amazing, Willow. As usual.
You guys get your scores?
How fast can a man remove his hand from a shoulder?
Cordelia! Willow is very sad. From
her academic failure and how did you do?
She hands Xander her scores. He reads them, frowning.
This is not good.
What’s not good?
I’m just worried it may hurt my
standing as campus stud when people
find out I’m dating a BRAIN.
Please. I have some experience in
covering these things up.
Oz is looking at Willow’s.
Yeah, I can see why you’d be upset.
(off their looks)
That was my sarcastic voice.
Sounds a lot like your regular voice.
I’ve been told that. But I’m
thinking we should celebrate. Do something.
Like, the four of us?
Double date… Could have potential…
Buffy approaches, looking pretty shell shocked herself.
Buffy! Hey, did you get your SAT scores?
And from the look on your face, I
suspect that we’ll be manning the
drive-thru side by side.
These scores — what do they really mean?
Buffy hands her results to Willow. She reads them, goes wide-eyed.
Buffy, you kicked ass!
Everyone gasps at her potty mouth.
Okay, so academic achievement gets me
a little excited.
Buff, that’s amazing!
Let me see that.
She looks at the scores, frowning. She’s been licked.
Scores like that, you can apply
pretty much anywhere you want.
This could, like, change your whole future.
That thought had occurred to me…
Then why the long face?
I don’t know. I guess… My future.
Never really thought about it.
Wasn’t sure I was gonna have one.
I think it’s great. Now you can
leave and never come back.
I mean in a positive way! Get out of
Sunnydale, that’s a good thing! I
mean, what kind of moron would ever
want to come back here?
EXT. PLAYGROUND – NIGHT
A shot-by-shot recreation of Spike’s arrival in “School Hard.” There’s that “Welcome to Sunnydale”
sign. And here comes SPIKE’S CAR, crashing into it as it screeches to a stop.
Growling rock cue as the door opens. Except instead of one boot, an entire Spike falls bodily out of
the car. A clatter of empties, bottles and cans, accompanies him. Our boy’s bombed.
Home sweet… home…
A moment of looking blearily around, then his head drops back and hits pavement.
END OF TEASER
INT. FACTORY – NIGHT
Spike wanders through the burnt-out factory, toting a bottle of mescal (as he often will). He is drunk,
forlorn. Hums MY WAY — and begins to sing, mangling the lyrics.
Mistakes… I’ve made a few… I ate
it up… and spit it out… and did
it my way…
He looks around.
He wends his way out of frame.
INT. DRUSILLA’S ROOM – NIGHT
The room has been largely burnt-out, but most furniture,props and structure remain intact, if singed.
Spike stumbles down the stairs and through the archway into the room. He calls out:
Drusilla… I’m home…
Laughs a bit — and then starts crying.
He reaches Dru’s rows of dollies. Puts down the bottle and picks up one of the burnt, tortured dolls.
Touches its face.
Why’d you do it, baby? Why’d you
leave me? We were happy here…
He tries to keep from sobbing — then growls, furious, and MORPHS to vampface. He throws the doll
to the floor. He grabs a floor length candelabrum and starts smashing the doll for all he’s worth.
You stupid, worthless bitch!
Look what you’ve done to me!
He stops, breathing hard. Throws the candelabra in a corner. Starts laughing. Then stops.
All right. Enough moping.
Who can I kill?
INT. SCHOOL HALLWAY – DAY
Xander and Cordelia at her locker.
Come on, it’ll be fun.
I don’t know. I thought we were
gonna do something, you know, classy.
What’s classier than bowling?
Apart from everything ever? Let’s see…
Oz and Willow are down. You’re the
swing vote. I guarantee fun.
He notices something in her locker: Pictures of the two of them, taped to the door.
Hey. Those are from the pier.
Yeah, I just got them developed.
There’s pictures. Of me. On your locker.
Cordelia slams her locker, tries to act defensive but loses it in her heartfelt explanation.
I put them there because I want to
see your face between classes, get
it? So thinking of us together makes
me… I don’t know… HAPPY, okay? Is
that such a big deal?
Xander takes her hands, calming her down.
For ME, big deal. Never knew I was
locker door material.
Mutual goo-goo eyes.
Well… just barely. Besides, I look
really cute in those pictures.
ANGLE: OZ AND WILLOW
As they approach, walking up hand-in-hand.
What’s the verdict? Do we bowl?
Xander looks at Cordelia.
A double bowling date!
I’m on Oz’s team.
Xander links arms with Cordy as they start to leave.
Yeah, well, prepare to be crushed.
Maybe we should practice…
Willow opens her locker, so near, so very near to where Cordy’s was. Oz pulls something from his
pocket as Willow puts in books, talks.
They haven’t got a prayer. I’m
really good — or I was when we had
those inflatable things in the
gutters… what’s this?
What’s the occasion?
Pretty much you are.
He hands her something wrapped in newspaper. She opens it to find a PEZ DISPENSER with a cute
green witch head.
It’s a little witch Pez!
Kind of a theme present. Do you like it?
Willow is BLOWN AWAY by this.
I like. I MORE than like… This…
Oz, this might be the nicest… We
need to find a Pez WEREWOLF. Then Pez
witch can have a boyfriend!
Hmm. Never seen a werewolf Pez.
Might have to settle for a wacky
(starting to well up)
This is so thoughtful…
Well, I think about you.
And I don’t have anything to give you.
Yes you do.
He kisses her, sweetly, on the lips, and leaves. She looks at her Pez, elation turning to worry.
INT. LIBRARY – AFTERNOON (DAY)
Giles has Buffy’s scores in hand. She is eyeing the large array of bags and camping gear he has on
Buffy. This is remarkable.
So is this… Where IS this
retreat thing — the Yukon?
It’s quite nearby. The clearing at
the top of Breaker’s Woods. Site of
some fascinating Druidic rituals.
Okay, but it’s just a few days,
right? You’re not gonna settle there
and grow crops or anything.
What? My gear? I’m only bringing
the basic necessities.
Giles, you pack like me.
He hands her her scores back.
Here. I suspect your mother will
want to put this on your refrigerator.
Oh yeah. She saw these scores, her
head spun around and exploded.
I’ve been on this Hellmouth for too
long. That was metaphorical, yes?
Yes. She was happy. Started up with
all kinds of crazy talk about me
going to college, maybe going
He knits his brow.
I know, I told her you’d have a goat,
I mean, responsibilities and all, I
know the drill —
She may he right.
Yeah, I figured you’d —
Whoakay. Be kind, rewind. May be right?
With scores like these, you could get
a first rate education. Buffy, I’m
not going to ask you to ignore your
calling, but you do need to look to
your future. And with Faith here, it
may be that you could move on, at
least for a time.
She’s not sure how she feels about that.
We’ll discuss it when I get back.
While I’m gone I’ll expect you to
keep up on your training. And don’t
do anything rash.
Anything rash meaning…?
(a little uncomfortable)
Are you planning to see Angel?
(gets his meaning)
Well, yeah, but Giles, there’s not
gonna be any rash. Anywhere. We’re
friends, and that’s all either of us
wants. Nothing’s gonna happen.
EXT. PALM QUAD – DAY
Xander and Willow are alone. She has worked herself up into something of a lather.
Something’s gonna happen.
It’s a mistake. It’s a terrible,
fatal mistake. I see that now.
It’s bad bowling. It’s a double date
with all of us and they’re gonna know!
How are they gonna know?
It’s a very intimate situation, it’s
all sexy with the smoke and the
sweating and the shoe rental —
You’re turned on by rented shoes?
That’s not the issue.
Okay, well, let me ask you this: what
are they gonna know? That we’re
friends, old old friends and maybe we
had one or two indiscretions but
that’s all past, we’re just very good
friends that like to hang out and can
I kiss your earlobe?
No! Well, okay. No!
Holds up the Pez like a talisman.
Xander and Willow stare at each other. Heat building. He puts his hand around her neck.
Bowling may be a bit too much
to handle. Man.
I wish I wasn’t so attracted to you.
I wish we could just make it stop.
Neither has one.
INT. BUFFY’S KITCHEN – NIGHT
Buffy eats microwaved something. JOYCE presents her with brochure after brochure.
Carnegie Mellon has a wonderful
design curriculum. And Brown
University’s history program is…
You like history, right?
Couldn’t we do this another time?
This whole day, everyone’s like,
“Congratulations. Go away.”
That’s not it. It’s just — You
should be at a good old-fashioned
college, with keg parties and boys.
Not here, with Hellmouths and vampires.
Not really seeing a huge distinction there…
You’re always talking about how you
wish you could lead a more normal
life. Well, this is your chance.
It’s not that simple, Mom. I have responsibilities.
I know, I know. But I spoke with
Mr. Giles, and he said —
That Faith could be Miss Sunnydale in
the Slayer pageant. I know.
It’s time to think about the future,
Buffy. About your whole life. I
mean honestly, is there anything
keeping you here?
CLOSE ON Buffy, suddenly uneasy as she thinks of EXACTLY who’s keeping her there:
INT. MANSION – NIGHT
CLOSE ON: ANGEL. The reason. He sits on the floor in front of the fire, reading. (Reading NAUSEA in
the original French, oh Propmaster.)
After a bit, he closes the book and heads for bed (The drapes away from the garden doors).
ANGLE: through the boarded up doors (trashed in ep 7). We see him disappear through the drapes.
This is the POV of:
EXT. GARDEN – CONTINUOUS – NIGHT
SPIKE, who stands bottle in hand and drunk to the point of slurred speech, watching Angel disappear.
Yeah, you… you think I’m afraid of
you? We were happy, you brainwashed
her… I can just —
Takes a big ol’ swig —
Yeah. I’ll show you who’s…
cool guy. You’re going down.
Spike drops to the ground, passed out. Hold the shot to show that he’s not moving, and not getting
up any time soon.
EXT. GARDEN – NEXT MORNING (DAY)
Spike is still passed out. Dawn creeps up bit by bit, and when sunlight hits Spike’s arm, his hand
starts to smoke — he stirs, uncomfortable, then opens his eyes as his hand BURSTS INTO FLAME.
He quickly douses it in the fountain, takes off up the stairs, coat thrown over his head.
EXT. OUTSIDE GARDEN WALL – CONTINUOUS – DAY
His car’s parked here and he runs for it, opens the door.
INT. SPIKE’S CAR – CONTINUOUS
As Spike dives into the darkened area, slamming the door behind him and blowing on his hand. The
interior is a mess of booze bottles. He grabs a half-full one and pours whiskey on his hand, and the
rest of it down his throat.
This is just too much.
INT. MAGIC SHOP – DAY
Someone is leaving as the CLERK closes the register.
I know you’ll enjoy that.
She is cheerful, new-agey. She hears someone in the back, heads back there and sees Spike in the
darkened area going through books.
Oh! Did you come in through the back?
Yeah. I need a curse.
A curse! Something nasty — boils.
I wanna give him boils. All over his
face, dripping pustules, let’s really
go for the gusto here.
I’m hearing a lot of negative energy
and I’ll bet —
Leprosy! A spell that makes his
parts fall off, that sounds proper.
ANGLE: THE STORE ENTRANCE
As Willow enters.
We don’t, uh, carry leprosy.
Would you excuse me a moment?
She moves to the front of the store to greet Willow. From where she is, Willow cannot see Spike.
Blessed be. Anything in particular
I can help you find?
Willow reads from a list.
Yeah. It’s all on here. Let’s see,
skink root, essence of rose thorn, a
couple canary feathers…
Ah-hah. A lust spell. I’ll need to
see some I.D.
Willow looks horrified, embarrassed.
Just kidding, just kidding. Love
spell. Want that old lover to come
back to you. You sure you know what
you’re doing, hon?
No! I mean… yes. I mean, I know how
to do a love spell… but this is for
an ANTI-love spell. Kind of a
delusting. I guess, the supplies are
basically the same, huh?
Basically. Though raven feathers tend
to breed more discontent than the canary.
Let me just grab some of these things…
Hiding in back with a clear view of the front counter. He watches with interest.
The clerk places a few items in a bag, rings up the price.
Fifteen eighty three for the lot.
Oh! The raven feathers. Well, I’ll
throw them in for free.
Willow gives her a twenty.
Now, an anti-attraction spell is just
as difficult as a love spell. You be careful.
The clerk hands Willow her change. As Willow heads out of the store:
Blessed… yeah. You too.
Willow is out the door. The clerk moves to the back of the store.
So, did you find a spell book?
Forget the book.
She turns behind the bookshelf and Spike is in full vampface.
Before the clerk can react, Spike is on her neck, feeding ferociously. After a beat he comes up, maw
dripping blood, and looks toward the front door.
I just got a better idea.
END OF ACT ONE
EXT. MAYOR’S OFFICE – DAY (STOCK)
INT. MAYOR’S OFFICE – DAY
CLOSE ON an office golf game — one that returns the ball — as a ball rolls just wide of it.
WIDER ANGLE on the Mayor, working on his short game as the Deputy Mayor stands by him.
Look at that. Every time, cuts to
the left. And it’s not the carpet.
He retrieves the ball as he continues.
I swear, I would sell my soul for a
decent short game.
Of course, it’s a little late for
that… Don’t suppose I could offer
YOUR soul? Really help me on the green…
Allan has no reply.
I’m just funnin’. So, we have a
Spike problem, do we?
He’s been spotted back in town. And
there was an incident at a magic
shop — in broad daylight. The
police had a hell of a time covering it up.
Well, yes, he got up to all sorts of
shenanigans last year. Had a world
of fun just trying to guess what he’d
do next! Funny guy.
But I guess we’re past that, now.
This year is too important to let a
loose cannon rock the boat.
Should I have Mr. Trick send a…
committee to deal with this?
Loose cannon. Rock the boat.
Now is that a mixed metaphor?
Uh, I don’t know…
Boats did have cannons. And a loose
one would cause it to rock…
Honestly, I don’t know where my mind
goes sometimes. Why don’t you take
care of this Spike problem. A
committee, like you said.
It’s good as done.
That’s swell. Fore!
He putts again.
INT. MANSION – AFTERNOON (DAY)
Angel and Buffy sit on the couch. She has a bunch of pamphlets — he looks one over.
Kind of an intense proposition.
Where do you want to go?
Oh, I don’t even know. Mom’s just so
pumped, she grabbed all of these.
She can’t stop talking about it — I
had a really hard time coming up with
an alibi to get over here.
She doesn’t know about me.
Big no. She’s having enough trouble
dealing with the Slayer issue; I
don’t think she’s ready to process
the information about us being…
He nods, understanding, though not thrilled.
I think the whole college jones is
kind of her reacting to the Slayer thing.
She wants you to get out.
Somewhere a little less hellmouthy.
And she has a point… but there’s
reasons to stay, too.
What are they?
She looks at him — he has to ask?
Well, uh, you know, Slayer duties,
and… what do you think I should do?
As a friend… I think you should
leave. This is a good opportunity.
She’s quietly disappointed.
Yeah. Well, ’cause there really
isn’t any great reason to stay, I guess.
Thanks for the advice. Another
perspective to weigh in there.
I better get back.
Yeah, but Mom… she starts worrying
a lot earlier these days. I’ll stop by soon.
She takes off, leaving the brochures on the table. Angel watches her go, dissatisfied.
INT. CHEMISTRY LAB – NIGHT
Willow has been preparing the darkened area to do the de-lusting spell: Candles, burning herbs, a
large beaker filled with potion on a bunsen burner, etc. She reads to herself from a spell book.
Xander enters and she scrambles to hide the book behind her back.
Whoah. It smells like church in here.
No, wait… EVIL church.
It’s just chemistry stuff.
So you said when you called.
Why do I have to be here?
It’ll help you with the exam.
You’re WAY behind.
But that’s what you love about me,
right? Academically dangerous.
Here. Hold this.
Willow hands him a raven feather.
Feather. And who will I be tickling?
Okay… bring mixture to a boil…
Willow turns on the bunsen burner under the beaker. Then needs to peek in her spell book. Tries to
hide it from Xander.
I assume all this won’t make us late
for our evening of bowling magic?
Magic? There’s no magic! I mean…
bowling. Yeah. Cordelia and Oz are
going to meet us here later.
Can’t we turn on the lights?
Is that a spell book?
No, no, no. CHEMISTRY book.
Wait a minute… we HAVE deja-vu…
This is love spell stuff! Are you
doing a love spell?
No! Of course not! This is a purely scientific…
(the gig is up)
De-lusting spell. For us. I thought
it would go easier if you didn’t know.
Are you nuts? In case you’ve
forgotten, I tend to have bad luck
with these sorts of spells.
You SAID you wished these feelings
could just go away.
I wish lots of things. I told you I
wished I was a fireman in sixth grade,
but you never followed through on THAT!
I can’t do this anymore Xander! This
whole “us” thing is just… BLEAGHH!
Fine! No more kissing. I’m with you.
It’s not just the kissing. It’s the
groping and the squeezing and the
panting, and EVERYTHING that feels
really good… until I think about Oz
and then it feels really bad.
(holds up PEZ)
He gave me PEZ, Xander! Even YOU
never gave me Pez!
Exactly. You’ve got Oz and Pez, I’ve
got Cordy… and well, I’ve got
Cordy. So do we really need to resort
to the BLACK ARTS to keep our
hormones in check?
At this moment? I’m thinking no.
Where’s the lights?
He makes for the switch. It’s by the corner that leads to the door. It’s entirely possible that if you
stood by the light switch somebody could step out right behind you in a surprising way.
Xander turns on the lights, turns back to say:
We gotta clean this up before they
get here and start asking questions.
Spike steps out right behind him.
Willow sees, calls out:
He starts to turn and Spike grabs him from behind.
I need to borrow the little girl.
You don’t mind, do you?
By way of reply, Xander swings his legs up and plants his feet against the wall, pushes himself and
Spike backwards. They go flying into some desks for a messy fall.
Willow grabs the nearest weapon — a microscope (or something cooler) and makes for Spike.
Spike comes up and punches Xander, who’s still on the ground. He then rises and catches Willow’s
bludgeoning object in mid swing.
Are you threatening me? Not nice.
We’re all gonna be very best friends.
Xander rises behind him, fury etched on his face — and Spike swings the microscope behind him,
etches that on Xander’s face instead.
SMASH TO BLACK.
INT. DRUSILLA’S ROOM – NIGHT
CLOSE ON a bunch of spell stuff lifted from the magic shop (along with what Willow had) as it is
dumped out of a box on the bed.
Willow sits on the edge of the bed, wide eyed and terrified. Xander lies on it, still unconscious,
sporting a nasty head wound.
Spike dumps out the rest of the stuff, throws the box away.
A spell. For me. You’re gonna
do a spell for me.
Um, what… kind of spell…?
A love spell! Are you brain dead?
He abruptly turns and crosses to a chest, grabs a half-finished bottle of mescal. Swigs mightily.
I’m gonna get what’s mine. What’s
MINE. Teach her to walk out on me…
what are you staring at?
You can do it, right? Make Dru love
me again? Make her crawl?
I… I can try…
He grabs her by the back of the head, brings her close.
What are you talking to me about
trying? You’ll do it!
Yes! I’ll do it!
He smashes the bottle on a bedpost, holds the jagged end inches from Willow’s face.
You lie to me, I’ll shove this
through your face! Do you want that?
All the way through to your brain!
She is practically crying with terror, weakly mewling:
No… please… no…
He stops, drops the bottle, his own eyes welling up. The anger deflating as abruptly as it came. After
She wouldn’t even kill me.
Willow is still rigid, waiting for the worst, but Spike is clearly spent. He spills the odd tear as he
She just left. She didn’t even care
enough to cut off my head, or light
me on fire. Was that so much to ask?
Some little sign that she cared?
He sits by her, heavy with reverie.
It was that truce with Buffy that did
it. Dru said I’d gone soft; wasn’t demon
enough for the likes of her. I said
it didn’t mean anything, I was
thinking of her the whole time; she
didn’t care. We got to Brazil and
she was just different, just… I
gave her everything… jewels,
beautiful dresses — with beautiful
girls in them, nothing made her
happy. And she would flirt… I
caught her on a park bench making out
with a Chaos Demon — have you ever
seen a Chaos Demon? They’re all
slime and antlers, they’re
disgusting; she only did it to hurt
me… I said I wasn’t putting up with
it anymore, she said fine, I said,
yeah, I’ve got an unlife, you know…
and she said… she said we could
still be friends! Oh-God, I’m so unhappy!
He bursts into serious tears, buries his head in Willow’s shoulder. She is entirely nonplussed.
(into her neck)
Friends! How could she be so cruel?
He holds onto her, letting the sobs subside — and they do, his grasp becoming a little tighter, more
sensual, his face in her neck advancing to nuzzlage. She begins to look increasingly alarmed.
Mmmmm… your neck, that smell…
He lifts his face — and it’s gone vampy.
I haven’t had a woman in weeks —
Willow springs up.
Whoah! No! Hold it!
Well, unless you count that shopkeeper…
Now hold on! I’ll do your spell,
and, and, I’ll get you Drusilla back
but there’s no bottles in the face
and there’s no “having”! Of any
kind! With me. All right?
He stands, growling — and a second later his face morphs (greenscreen) back to human.
All right. Get started.
She starts rummaging through the stuff.
I’m not a real witch, you know. I’m
not… sure it’ll work right away.
Well, if at first you don’t succeed,
I kill him and you try again.
This… isn’t enough.
There’s other ingredients. And I
need a book, a spell book. This isn’t it.
You’ve got one, though? At home?
Not at home… I left it somewhere…
Spike gets in her face.
INT. LIBRARY – NIGHT
Buffy is jumping rope. The library doors slam open. Buffy spins to see Cordelia and Oz enter, visibly
Oh, thank god. You ARE here.
Not all of us have dates tonight.
INT. CHEMISTRY LAB – NIGHT
Buffy, Cordelia and Oz walk amidst the scene of Xander and Willow’s abduction. A big mess. Spell
junk spilled all over.
We were supposed to meet them here.
I don’t know what could have happened…
Buffy picks up a candle. Runs her finger through a gooey puddle of potion on the counter.
What is all this stuff? Cause I’m
thinking WEIRD science.
Was Willow messing with her magic
tricks again? Maybe they disappeared.
Maybe she turned Xander into
Whatever happened, there was a fight.
There’s no blood.
Either they ran, or they were taken, or…
You’re having too many “Or”s! Pick one!
I’m not sure. I need you guys to
find Giles. I’ll look around —
maybe they didn’t go far.
Where is Giles?
He’s at some retreat up near the
clearing in Breaker’s woods.
I know the spot. But it’s like a 45-minute drive.
They split off in opposite directions as they exit the room.
INT. LIBRARY – CONTINUOUS – NIGHT
Buffy enters and grabs the crossbow out of the cabinet. Her intense focus is broken when the PHONE
RINGS in Giles’ office. Startled. Could that be him?
Buffy moves to the counter and grabs up the receiver.
Hi, Buffy. Still working out?
Mom. No, I’m…
I was hoping we could schedule a
college talk later tonight.
INT. BUFFY’S KITCHEN – CONTINUOUS – NIGHT
CLOSE ON Joyce, glancing at some college brochures in her hand.
I admit I overreacted before. You
don’t HAVE to go all the way across
the country. I picked up some
brochures on some NEARBY schools, okay?
SPIKE STEPS INTO FRAME directly behind Joyce. BOO!
INT. LIBRARY – CONTINUOUS – NIGHT
That’s great, mom, but now’s not really…
And her face goes white when she hears the voice on the other end of the line:
A moment, and Buffy drops the phone, sprinting out of frame.
END OF ACT TWO
INT. BUFFY’S KITCHEN – NIGHT
CLOSE ON a kettle as it is carried to a mug which sits next to a box of cocoa mix. Joyce pours as
Spike continues to talk, his voice thick with emotion:
So I happen to walk by, and she’s
making out with a Chaos Demon! And
I said, you know, I don’t have to put
up with this, and she said, fine, and
I said, fine, do whatever you want!
I thought we’d make up, you know…
Well, she sounds very unreasonable.
She is! She’s out of her mind!
That’s what I miss most about her…
Well, Spike, sometimes, even when two
people seem right for each other,
their lives just take different
paths. When Buffy’s father and I
started having trouble —
But this is different! Our love was
eternal! Literally! You got any of
those little marshmallows?
Let me look.
EXT. BUFFY’S HOUSE (BACK DOOR) – CONTINUOUS – NIGHT
Angel walks up slowly to the house, carrying the brochures Buffy left behind at the mansion.
ANGEL’S POV as he sees the back door open and walks up to it. Looks in at Spike and Joyce.
INT. BUFFY’S KITCHEN – CONTINUOUS – NIGHT
ANGLE: THE BACK DOOR
Where Angel registers only a split second of disbelief before he reacts, growling and flying through
the door, except OOPS, he can’t, and he smacks into the invisible barrier with all the force of a really
Joyce screams, jumps back into a corner. Spike rises, more calmly, and joins her at her left side.
Oh my god. Get away from here!
Yeah, you’re not invited!
He’s crazy. He’ll kill us!
Not while I breathe!
Well, actually I don’t…
Joyce, listen to me!
You get away from this house!
I’ll stake you myself.
Spike is visibly amused. Taunts Angel by pointing at Joyce’s neck behind her back. Joyce’s frightened
eyes never leave Angel.
You’re a very bad man.
Joyce, you can’t trust him.
Invite me in!
As Spike feigns biting motions in the direction of Joyce’s neck:
You touch her and I’ll cut your head off.
Yah? You and what army?
That would be me.
Spike spins and she’s right behind him, roundhouses him right off his feet. He lands in a corner, looks
up in fury.
Buffy stands over him, looking imposing.
(eyes on Spike)
Angel. Why don’t you come on in.
Angel steps in. Joyce —
— flitters to the other side of the room.
Spike stands, eyeing them both.
You shouldn’t have come back.
I do what I please.
Okay, I’m confused again…
Spike makes a move toward Buffy — Angel slams him back into the wall. Buffy grabs a wooden spoon
You took Willow.
You do me now, and you’ll never
find the little witch.
Willow’s a witch?
Xander’s a witch?
Where are they?
Doesn’t work like that, peaches, and
when did you become all soul-having
again? I thought you outgrew that.
Your friend’s gonna work a little
magic for me. She does my spell,
I let them both go.
You’re not famous for keeping promises.
You and your great poof here want to
tag along, fine. But get in my way,
and you kill your friends.
INT. OZ’ VAN – NIGHT
(occasional exterior shots of the van throughout this scene, if possible.) Oz drives, Cordy holds a
What if they were kidnapped by
Colombian DRUG LORDS? They could be
cutting off Xander’s ear right now…
Or other parts!
Oz ignores her, intent on the road.
More and more, Oz starts sniffing the air. Doesn’t even realize he’s doing it. Sniffs more and more
intensely, inching his head out the window.
Oz? You missed the turn.
Oz slows the van to a halt, sniffing harder and harder.
It’s Willow. She’s nearby
What, you can smell her?
She doesn’t even wear perfume.
He sniffs again, throws the van into reverse.
Oh my god. This is a residual
werewolf thing, isn’t it? I think
that’s very disturbing.
I really agree…
EXT. OZ’ VAN – CONTINUOUS – NIGHT
As it finishes backing up and turns left, guns down a side street.
EXT. STREET OUTSIDE THE MAGIC SHOP – NIGHT
Spike, Angel and Buffy head for the shop.
Just need a few supplies, then I’ll
take you — ohhhh…
Spike groans and clutches his head.
What’s wrong, not that I care?
My head. I think I’m sobering up.
It’s horrible. Ugh. I wish I was dead.
(pulling out a stake)
Well, if you close your eyes
and wish real hard…
Buffy we still need him to find the others.
“Need him.” He’s probably just got
’em locked up in the factory.
Spike blanches, but covers:
How thick do you think I am?
All right. Let’s just get this done.
As they turn the corner to the shop, Spike stops, staring at a bench.
We killed a homeless man on this
bench. Me and Dru. Good times…
He begged for mercy, and that just
made her bite harder…
He stops. The other two aren’t laughing.
I guess you had to be there.
INT. MAGIC SHOP – NIGHT
As the door is forced open by Buffy. It swings in, Buffy ripping police tape off the door frame as she
enters. Holding it up to Spike:
Here’s the list.
Buffy drops the tape, looks at the list.
“Essence of violet” — Angel?
He starts hunting —
“Cloves, set of runic tablets” — and
Spike, you can find the rats eyes.
Now they all look about.
I used to bring her rats…
With the morning paper…
Oh, good, more moping. That’s really
gonna win her back, Spike.
The spell’s gonna get her back.
Lot of trouble for someone who
doesn’t even care about you.
Shut your gob.
She’s just kind of fickle…
Spike leaps at him, punches him twice before —
Buffy grabs him, pulls him off. He’s still in a fury.
What do you know? It’s your fault,
the both of you! She belongs with me.
I’m nothing without her.
That one I’m gonna back up.
(goes back to looking around)
It’s just pathetic. You’re not even
a loser anymore. You’re a shell of a loser.
Yeah, and you’re one to talk.
Last time I looked in on you, you two
were fighting to the death. Now
you’re back to making googly eyes at
each other like nothing happened.
Makes me want to heave.
Excuse me! There’s no eye googling here.
Oh, sure, you’re just friends.
You’re not friends. You’ll never be
friends. You’ll be in love till it
kills you both. You’ll fight, you’ll
shag, you’ll hate each other till it
makes you quiver, but you’ll never be
friends. Real love isn’t brains,
children, it’s blood, it’s blood
screaming inside you to work its
will. I may be love’s bitch, but at
least I’m man enough to admit it.
There is silence. Buffy and Angel are comeback deficient. They resolutely do not look at one another.
Spike holds up a jar.
Eye of rat.
INT. DRUSILLA’S ROOM – NIGHT
Xander stirs, moaning.
Putting her shoulder to the door, and getting a sore shoulder for her troubles. She pauses, hears
Xander, and runs down to him.
He tries to sit up. She helps him.
Are you okay?
Dizzy. Kinda nauseous, too. Do I
remember having a fight with Spike?
He feels his head — there is blood dried on it.
I won, right? I kicked his ass.
You were real brave…
He bends over, head down. Holds onto her hand, tight.
Do you need to barf?
No… I’m okay.
Where are we?
The factory. We’re locked in the basement.
The factory where Spike lived? Burnt
out place in the middle of nothing…
So we’re pretty much into a “scream
all you want” scenario.
Why didn’t he just kill us?
He wants me to do a love spell.
Drusilla broke up with him.
Gee, and we’d all hoped those crazy
kids were gonna make it work.
He’s out of control. I mean, not
that he was Joe Restraint in the old days…
So what are our options?
Well, I figure either I refuse to do
the spell and he kills us, or I do
the spell, and he kills us.
Give me a third option.
He’s so drunk he forgets all about us
and we starve to death. That’s sort
of the best one.
He grabs her shoulders, not harshly.
Willow. We’re not gonna die. If
he’s so drunk he’ll get sloppy and
I’ll make my move. As long as my
move doesn’t involve standing up or
using my limbs, we’ll be okay.
She folds into his arms, frightened and weary. Takes comfort there. Their embrace, however, begins
to take on subtext. Their faces move closer to each other…
We’re not supposed to…
Exemption for Impending Death Situations.
They kiss. They really give themselves up to it. Gently sink to the bed, revealing Oz and Cordelia at
the bottom of the stairs, staring at them.
The kissers look over.
Oz and Cordy just stand there staring as Willow and Xander scramble to a seated position.
Oh, God… Oz…
We have to get out of here.
Xander jumps off the bed, moves a couple steps toward Cordy and stops.
CLOSE ON Cordelia, devastated. She turns and runs up the stairs.
Just as she’s out of view, we hear part of the staircase COLLAPSE. Cordy SCREAMS as she plummets
through, then a CRASH, then silence. All three run to the stairs.
Near the top, the stairs have collapsed, leaving the gaping, splintered hole through which Cordy fell.
Willow, Oz and Xander reach the edge of the hole and peer down.
One level down, Cordelia lies on her back in shock amidst a debris pile.
CAMERA MOVES down her body to her abdomen, out of which pokes a big sharp piece of metal from
behind. Skewered. Looks bad.
ANGLE: THE CREW ABOVE
All three shell-shocked at the sight.
EXT. MAGIC SHOP – NIGHT
Buffy, Angel and Spike exit and close the door behind them. They start walking down the sidewalk,
all carrying magic shop items.
We got the stuff. So where are they?
What’s your hurry?
My hurry is my intense desire to get
you out of my life. You tend to make trouble.
Well, I’ll be out of your life in a
few short hours. No trouble at all.
The three look up to see five vampires waiting for them at the end of the road. The leader LENNY,
stands in front, smiling coldly.
Spike and the others stop, exceedingly wary. Look behind them.
Five more vampires stand there.
No trouble at all…
END OF ACT THREE
EXT. STREET OUTSIDE THE MAGIC SHOP – NIGHT
The stand off.
Lenny… how’ve you been?
Better since you left. You should
have stayed gone.
Is that right?
You know, he was just leaving…
Don’t you start something.
That pissant used to work for me!
My friends are in trouble.
We cannot risk this.
I don’t think we have a choice.
You other two can walk away from this.
I die, your chums die…
I guess we’re staying.
Not for long.
He motions — and all ten rush our people at once.
(NOTE: the fighting in this act will be indicated only generally.)
ANGLE: BUFFY jumps into the Espresso Pump. Three follow, and she crashes about in there,
managing to stake one.
ANGLE: ANGEL almost makes it to the door — but two attack him, and they trade blows.
ANGLE: SPIKE jumps on top of a car, where they can only rush him one or two at a time. He plays
king of the hill, and seems to be winning. One of them attacks him with a jagged wooden fencepost –
- and is soon wearing it in his chest. (Two down.)
Buffy throws the two left on her, heads over to Angel and helps him take on his two.
Spike leaps off the car and joins the others. They run into the shop.
INT. MAGIC SHOP – CONTINUOUS
They pile in, slam the door behind them — and Buffy moves a cabinet in front of it. (NOTE: the door
should not be glass.)
It’s got a gate rolled in front of it, but the vampires are pulling at it furiously.
Spike and Angel instantly heave a giant bookcase in front of it.
Spike grabs a chair and smashes it on the floor. Tosses a makeshift stake to each of the others, grabs
They stand, the three of them in the middle of the store. Camera moves in on them, low, as they
This should be a kick…
I violently dislike you.
BOOM! The backdoor flies open. Angel runs to it, clotheslines the first vamp through and hits the
wall, slams it shut after two more get in. Keeps his back to it, despite pounding.
Spike spars with the first. Buffy is caught between the other two, by the sliding ladder in the middle
of the store. Ladder-fu ensues.
The back door is getting seriously pounded.
INT. DRUSILLA’S BEDROOM/STAIRCASE – NIGHT
Xander and Willow at the edge of the hole, directly above Cordelia.
Cordy? Don’t move! Oz went for help!
Don’t move! Don’t even talk…
From below, very feeble:
No! That’s talking! DON’T talk!
I’m going down there.
It’s too unstable, Xander!
Will, she needs someone with her.
Xander looks to Willow for approval, and against her better judgement, she gives him the nod.
Using whatever he can grab hold of, Xander starts to lower himself down into the guts of the
staircase. Everything he touches cracks or at least creaks.
ANGLE: UP AT WILLOW
At the edge of the hole. She cries and squeaks the occasional “careful!” as she watches Xander
INT. MAGIC SHOP – NIGHT
Buffy stakes one of hers, knocks the other unconscious. Spike is having a little more trouble (he’s
still a teensy bit woozy) but he stakes his as well.
The front door and window are still being pounded at.
ANGLE: ANGEL listens — his door seems to be deserted now.
We have to get out of here.
Can we get to the roof?
The door behind him SLOWS INWARD, torn off its hinges by the combined strength of the two vamps
(one of whom is LENNY) behind it. It falls on Angel, and they vault over it.
She meets them head on, knocking one into oblivion and proceeding to her fallen boyfriend.
Lenny reaches Spike and they go at it. Lenny gets the upper hand, knocking Spike to the ground.
Yeah, I heard you’d gone soft.
Sad to see it, man.
Spike’s expression hardens. He stands.
Like baby food.
Spike grins. The OLD grin. One of the knocked out vamps stands behind him — Spike’s caught
between him and Lenny.
Well, then. Let’s give Baby a taste.
They come at him, and he moves like lightning. He fucks them up.
Is pulling Angel out from under the door.
I’m all right.
You’re not at full strength yet.
That window’s about to go.
We’ll get out the back —
He is looking at the shelves behind her. She turns, sees what he sees.
ANGLE: ON THE SHELVES
in rows, stacked like cans of beans and priced at $2.99 a piece, are jars of holy water.
Has Lenny in a headlock (the other vamp is down or dead) and is slamming his head repeatedly into
Baby like his supper?
Baby like his supper?
He is brimming with maniacal glee as he lets Lenny’s limp body fall to the ground. Grabs a wood
Why doesn’t baby have a nap?
He stands, breathing hard, facing Buffy and Angel.
Spike… Get down.
He looks at her quizzically — and the bookcase tumbles in behind him. The remaining vamps stand in
the window, triumphant.
Buffy and Angel start hurling mason jars like hand grenades. One after another, they explode on the
vamps. Smoke pours from the vamps as they retreat en masse.
Spike watches from the ground, pleased. Gets up when quiet settles.
Buffy and Angel stand together in the back of the shop.
Now that was fun.
(off their looks)
Don’t tell me that wasn’t fun. GOD!
It’s been so long since I had a
decent spot of violence!
Really puts things in perspective.
Angel moves — and clutches his side, doubling over slightly. Buffy grabs him, supports him.
I got you…
Oh yeah. You two. Just friends.
No danger there.
Let’s just do the damn spell,
Oh, sod the spell. Your friends
are in the factory.
(off her surprised look)
I’m glad I came here, you know? I
been all wrongheaded about this.
Weeping, crawling, blaming everybody
else. I want Dru back, I just have
to be the man I was. The man she
loved. I’m gonna do what I shoulda
done in the first place. I’ll find
her, wherever she is… and I’ll tie
her up and torture her until she
likes me again.
He heads out the back door, passing the non-plussed couple. Stops, and turns back to them.
Love’s a funny thing…
INT. TUNNELS BENEATH THE STAIRS – NIGHT
ANGLE ON: XANDER
He kneels cradling Cordy in the guts of the staircase, holding her hand. A lot of blood is now visible
around her wound. Xander is crying.
Willow still stands at the top of the hole, also distraught.
Just hold on. Please. Hold on…
I can’t see you…
CLOSE ON Cordelia as her eyes roll back in her head and her body goes limp. As far as we know, she
EXT. CEMETERY – DAY
A wide shot of a FUNERAL in full swing. A PRIEST is saying all the typical “ashes to ashes” stuff (too
far away to be seen) to the assembled mourners.
… because God did not make death,
and he does not delight in the death
of the living. For he created all
things that they might exist, and the
generative forces of the world are
wholesome, and there is no
destructive poison in them; and the
dominion of Hades is not on earth.
For righteousness is immortal.
We arm down just long enough that we’re convinced it’s Cordy’s funeral, then the camera finds Buffy
and Willow walking in foreground.
So, Cordy’s okay.
Yeah. She lost a lot of blood,
but no vital stuff got punctured.
Has she talked to Xander?
(shaking her head)
She couldn’t have visitors at first.
He’s going today.
Willow looks down. After a bit:
I didn’t know there was anything
inside me that could feel this bad.
Buffy puts her arm around her.
For the longest time I couldn’t figure
out what I wanted. I wanted everything.
(a tear runs out)
Now I just want Oz to talk to me again.
Give it some time. And get ready to grovel.
I’m ready. I’m all over groveling.
Good. You know, sometimes that can
INT. HOSPITAL ROOM – DAY
Xander appears at the door, grovel-ready, with a humongous bunch of flowers.
Cordelia lies in bed, facing the window.
Can I come in?
She turns to see him. He comes in, places flowers near her bed.
They wouldn’t let me see you till now.
She says nothing.
Look, Cordy, I just need you to know that —
Xander moves in close to her face.
Stay away from me.
He looks at her, the slowly moves from the bed. She looks back towards the window, pain etched on
EXT. MANSION GARDEN – NIGHT
Buffy finds Angel in the garden. She moves slowly behind him, and he turns. They stand a ways
I wondered when you were coming.
I’m not coming back.
He takes this in. Maybe it’s not a total shock, but it still feels like a body blow.
We’re not friends. Never were. I
can fool Giles, I can fool my
friends, but I can’t fool myself. Or
Spike, for some reason. What I want
from you, I can never have. You
don’t need me to take care of you any
more, so I’m gonna go.
I don’t accept that.
You have to.
There must be some way we can still
see each other.
There is. Just tell me you don’t love me.
He is silent. After a long beat, she leaves. He lets her.
Somber music from some band of young hipsters (or perhaps a stunning Lilith Fair chanteuse) plays
on the soundtrack as we see Angel, standing in silent grief.
MUSIC CONTINUES OVER:
A series of images: the kids in misery.
INT. WILLOW’S BEDROOM – DAY
Willow sits on her bed, holding her witch Pez.
INT. BRONZE – DAY
Oz sits, practicing his guitar. The place is empty, chairs on tables. Lonely tableau.
INT. LIBRARY – AFTERNOON (DAY)
Xander shelves books, not really into it.
INT. HOSPITAL ROOM – DAY
Cordelia in her bed. Half-eaten tray of crappy hospital food in front of her. She stares into space,
EXT. PALM QUAD – DAY
Buffy sits by herself. The song ends here.
A beat. Then all at once, loud music starts up:
EXT. HIGHWAY/INT. SPIKE’S CAR – DAY
Spike merrily drives down the road, happy to be undead again. He lights a cig and sings along with
the song. Scene is timed so that just as Sid/Spike sing the “I did it my way” lyric, we:
Morning at Sunnydale High School. Willow and Xander slowly walk together
across the lawn toward the walkway to the main entrance. In their hands
they have the results of their Scholastic Aptitude Tests, with which
neither is particularly happy.
Willow: This is a nightmare. This is… My world is spinning.
Xander: It’s not that bad, Willow, really.
Willow: 740? Verbal?! I’m-I’m… (searches for a word) pathetic!
Illiterate! I’m Cletus, the slack-jawed yokel.
Xander: (shrugs) That’s right. And the fact that your 740 verbal
closely resembles my combined scores in no way compromises your position
as the village idiot.
They fold up their score reports as they near a bench at the side of the
Willow: I just… (sits and slouches, depressed) Where did I go wrong?
Xander sits down next to her and puts his arm around her in comfort, but
not missing the opportunity to give her hair a gentle stroke.
Xander: You did amazing, Willow. As usual.
Behind them Oz and Cordelia approach.
Cordelia: You guys get your scores?
Xander instantly lets go of Willow, hops to his feet and rushes to meet
Xander: Cordelia! (points) Willow was very sad by her academic failure.
(reaches for Cordelia’s score report) How did you do?
He snags it from her hand, unfolds it and reads it.
Xander: This is not good.
Cordelia: What’s not good?
Oz gives Willow a reassuring stroke of her hair. She just sadly hands
him her report to see.
Xander: Well, I’m just worried it may hurt my standing as campus stud
when people find out I’m dating a brain.
Cordelia: (yanks her scores from his hand) Please. I have some
experience in covering these things up.
Oz: (to Willow) Well, I can see why you’d be upset.
Willow gives him a hurt look, grabs her report back from him and looks
down at the ground, her feelings of failure evident in her furrowed
Oz: That was my sarcastic voice.
Xander: You know, it sounds a lot like your regular voice.
Oz: I’ve been told that. (trying to be upbeat) But we should celebrate,
Cordelia: Like, the four of us?
She gives Xander a pointed look, shaking her head and clearly mouthing
“No”. He ignores her completely.
Xander: A double date! It could have potential.
Buffy walks up the steps from the street, a long look on her face, and
joins the gang.
Willow: (brightens and stands up) Buffy! Hey! Did you get your SAT
Buffy gives her a weak nod.
Xander: By the look on your face, I’m guessing you and I are gonna be
manning the drive-through window side by side.
Buffy: They’re just test scores, right? (hands hers to Willow) What do
they really mean, anyway?
Willow: (unfolds it and reads) (very excited) 1430! Buffy, you kicked
Buffy raises her eyebrows at her friend. Cordelia’s eyes go wide with
Willow: (more calmly) Okay, (folds the report) so academic achievement
gets me a little excited.
Buffy hands her scores to Xander for him to see.
Xander: Buff, that’s amazing.
Cordelia: Let me see that.
She yanks it out of Xander’s hand before he can even begin to unfold it
and checks it out.
Oz: Yeah. With scores like that, you can apply pretty much anywhere you
Willow: Buffy, this could, like, change your whole future.
Buffy: (unsure what to make of it) The thought had occurred to me.
Xander: Then why the sour puss?
Buffy: I don’t know. I guess… my future. I never really thought about
it. I wasn’t even sure I was going to have one.
Cordelia: (smiling hugely) Well, I think this is great! Now you can
leave and never come back!
She gets looks from everyone. Xander hands Buffy back her scores.
Cordelia: Well, I mean that in a positive way. Get out of Sunnydale.
That’s a good thing. What kind of moron would ever wanna come back here?
Cut to a small park and playground that night. A classic 1958 Dodge
Desoto FireFlite crashes through the ‘Welcome to Sunnydale’ sign and
screeches to a halt. The door opens and a nearly empty liquor bottle
falls out and smashes to pieces on the pavement. Spike slides off of his
seat and hits the street flat on his back on top of the broken glass,
drunk out of his mind. He lifts his head unsteadily and tries to raise
himself to his elbows.
Spike: Home, sweet… (chuckles) home.
He passes out and collapses back to the pavement.
Opening credits roll. Buffy’s theme plays.
~ ~ Part 1 ~ ~
Spike’s old burned-out factory. The place is a shambles, although the
great table where Giles started the fire is essentially intact, if
scorched. Spike strolls through the area, stepping over the strewn
chairs, while singing a few bars from “My Way”.
Spike: And more / Much more than this / I did it my way
Cut to the bedroom in the basement. Spike comes hopping merrily down the
Spike: Drusilla! I’m home!
When he reaches the bottom he breaks out into a pathetic fit of giggles
which quickly turn to sobs. He sniffs a few times and wipes his nose on
his sleeve. He sees what’s left of the burned bed and steps up to it,
steadying himself on a pillar. In despair he tosses his liquor bottle
onto the bed and steps around the column. From there he sees those
members of Drusilla’s doll collection that didn’t survive the fire piled
on her dresser, all badly scorched. He reaches for one and picks it up.
The features on its fine porcelain face can still be made out, but the
paint, hair and dress are long gone. He stares at the doll intensely.
Spike: Why did you do it, baby? Why did you leave me? We were happy
He tries to suppress a sob and shakes it off, and suddenly he’s wearing
his game face. He roars at the doll angrily and throws it hard down at
the concrete floor. He spins around, looking for something to smash it
with. He finds a tall iron candlestick, grabs it and wields it back.
Spike: YOU… (swings the candlestick) STUPID… (swings again)
WORTHLESS… (swings again) BITCH! (calms a bit) Look what you’ve done
He stares down at what’s left of the doll, its delicate porcelain
features smashed and scattered, limbs torn and singed. He drops the iron
candlestick on top of it.
Cut to Cordelia’s locker in the halls at school. She is getting what she
needs for class while Xander tries to talk her into the double date
Xander: C’mon. It’ll be fun!
Cordelia: I don’t know. I just thought we were gonna do something…
you know, classy?
Xander: What’s classier than bowling?
Cordelia: (raises her eyebrows at him) Apart from everything ever?
Xander: Oz and Willow are down. You’re the swing vote. (skips around to
her other side) I guarantee fun.
Cordelia can’t help but give him a warm smile and giggle. From his new
vantage point Xander can now see the inside of her locker door.
Xander: Hey, those are from the pier.
There are three pictures of them. One of the two of them sitting on a
bench with their arms around each other and smiling, another of just
Xander sporting a huge smile, and the third of her riding on Xander’s
back, smiling playfully with her arms wrapped tightly around his neck.
Cordelia: Yeah. Uh, I just got them developed.
Xander: (not yet sure what to make of it) There’s pictures. Of me. In
your locker. I never knew I was locker door material.
She closes her locker, and they begin walking down the hall.
Cordelia: Well… just barely. Besides, (smiles) I look really cute in
They meet Oz and Willow coming the other way.
Oz: Hey. So what’s the verdict? Do we bowl?
Xander gives Cordelia a pleading look.
Cordelia: (gives in) We bowl.
Willow: Great! Double bowling date. (pats Oz’s chest) I’m on Oz’s team.
Xander: Yeah? Well, (points at Oz) prepare to be crushed. (takes
Cordelia’s arm) Maybe we should practice.
Cordelia: (nods) Yeah.
They go their separate ways again. Oz goes with Willow to her locker.
Willow: They don’t stand a chance. I’m really good. Or I used to be,
(works her combination) when they had the inflatable things in the
She opens her locker door as Oz holds up something small wrapped in
newspaper. She faces him and notices him holding it up to her.
Willow: What’s this? (takes it)
Oz: It’s a gift.
Willow: (smiles) What’s the occasion? (unwraps it)
Oz: Pretty much you are.
Wrapped in the paper is a PEZ candy dispenser with a green witch’s head
on top, complete with red hair and black hat. Willow is very surprised
and gives Oz a none-too-gentle slap on the left side of his chest.
Willow: (excited) It’s a little, uh, PEZ witch!
Oz: It’s kind of a theme present. Do you like it?
Willow: (breathless) I like… I-I more than like. Oz, this is
probably the sweetest… We have to find a little PEZ werewolf, so
little PEZ witch can have a boyfriend.
Oz: I don’t think they make a werewolf PEZ. You might have to settle
for a wacky cartoon dog.
Willow: This is… just so thoughtful.
Oz: Well, I think about you.
Willow: (suddenly disappointed) Oh… I don’t have anything to give
Oz: (smiles at her) Yeah, you do.
He puts his hand on her shoulder briefly and then heads down the hall to
class. Willow follows him with her gaze for a moment, her expression
showing her worry about the levels of complexity this just added to her
life. She looks down at the PEZ dispenser.
Cut to the library. Giles looks over Buffy’s SAT score report while she
plays with a contraption from Giles’ huge pile of camping equipment and
clothing laid out on the big table.
Giles: Buffy, this is, this is remarkable.
Buffy: So is this. (puts the thing down) Where is this retreat thingy,
the Yukon? (reaches for something else)
Giles: It’s quite nearby, actually. (Buffy finds a compass) It’s, um,
it’s the clearing at the top of Breaker’s Woods.
Buffy opens the compass and sees that there is a mirror inside the lid.
She quickly checks her hair.
Giles: It’s the site of some fascinating druidic rituals.
Buffy: (closes the compass) Okay, but you’re just going for a few days,
right? (Giles takes the compass from her) I mean, you’re not gonna
settle there and grow crops or anything.
Giles: (confused) What? Oh, my gear. No, no, this is, this is basic
Buffy: Giles, you pack like me.
Giles: (gives her a little smile) Here. (hands Buffy her scores) I
suspect your mother will want to, uh, put it on the refrigerator.
Buffy: (puts the report away) Yeah. She saw these scores, and her head
spun around and exploded.
Giles: (unsure what she meant) I-I’ve been on the Hellmouth too long.
That was metaphorical, yes?
Buffy: Yes. She was happy.
Giles smiles in relief, and goes over to the cage.
Buffy: She started with all this crazy talk about me going to college,
maybe someplace else.
Inside the cage Giles pauses from pulling down a book.
Buffy: I know. I know, I said that you were gonna have a goat.
Responsibilities and all. I know the drill.
Giles: She may be right. (comes back out of the cage)
Buffy: Yeah, I know, I figured you’d…
She gives Giles a bewildered look.
Buffy: Okay. Be kind, rewind.
Giles: With scores like these, Buffy, you could have a first-rate
education. I’m, I’m not suggesting that you… ignore your calling, but,
um… you need to look to your future. (goes back to the table) And with
Faith here, i-i-it may be that you can (draws a breath) move on. For a-a
time, at least. (packs the book)
Buffy: (unsure how to react) Wow.
Giles: Well, let’s, um, let’s discuss it when I get back. I-in the
meantime, um, I’d like you to continue training while I’m, while I’m
gone, and, um, please don’t do anything rash.
Buffy: ‘Anything rash’, meaning…
Giles: (hesitates for an instant) Are you planning on seeing Angel?
Buffy: Yes. Actually, I am. (Giles averts his eyes) Look, but there’s
not gonna be any rash. (realizes how that sounds and gets a look from
Giles) Anywhere. (defensively) Okay. We’re, we’re friends. That’s all
either of us wants. (looks at Giles seriously) Nothing’s gonna happen.
Cut outside. Willow and Xander come walking around the corner from the
colonnade and through the breezeway.
Willow: Something’s gonna happen.
Xander: Like what?
Willow: Uh! It’s a mistake! It’s a terrible, fatal mistake. I see that
Xander: It’s just bowling.
They turn down a covered walkway.
Willow: It’s bad bowling. I-it’s a double date, with all of us, and
they’re gonna know!
Xander: How are they gonna know?
Willow: It’s a very intimate situation. It’s all sexy with the smoke
and the sweating and the shoe rental…
Xander: You’re turned on by rented shoes?
Willow: That’s not the issue.
They stop walking, and Xander faces her.
Xander: Okay, well, let me ask you this: what are they gonna know? That
we’re friends. Old, old friends. And maybe we’ve had one or two
indiscretions, but that’s all past. Look. We’re just very good friends
who like to hang out, and can I kiss your earlobe?
Willow: No! Well, okay. (jerks away) No! (holds up the dispenser) PEZ!
They both pause for a moment to calm down and think.
Xander: Maybe bowling might be too much to handle. Man! (strokes her
hair) I wish I wasn’t so attracted to you. (takes a deep breath) I wish
we could make it all stop.
Willow: Any suggestions?
Cut to the kitchen at Buffy’s house. She is making microwave popcorn.
Her mother has her hands full of college brochures.
Joyce: Carnegie Mellon has a wonderful design curriculum. Oh, and Brown
University’s history program is… You like history, right?
Buffy: Could we talk about this another time? (gets a large bowl) All
day it’s been like, ‘Congratulations! Go away.’ (takes the bowl to the
Joyce: That’s not it. It’s just you belong at a, a good old-fashioned
college with, with keg parties and boys, not here with Hellmouths and
The microwave beeps.
Buffy: Not really seeing the distinction.
She goes to get the bag of popcorn.
Joyce: Y’know, you’re always talking about how you wish you could lead
a more normal life. Well, this is your chance!
Buffy: Yeah, it’s just not that simple. (takes the popcorn to the bowl)
I have responsibilities. (opens the bag)
Joyce: I know, I know, but I spoke with Mr. Giles, and he said…
Buffy: …that Faith could be Miss Sunnydale in the Slayer Pageant. I
know. (dumps the popcorn into the bowl)
Joyce: It’s time to think about your future, Buffy, about your whole
life. I mean, honestly, is there anything keeping you here?
Cut to Angel’s mansion. He’s sitting by the fireplace quietly reading
“La Nausea”, by Jean Paul Sartre. Spike spies on him, peering in
between the boards that have been haphazardly nailed across the
destroyed doorway to the atrium. Finally Angel closes his book, gets up
and walks into a rear hallway. Spike gives him a drunken humph.
Spike: (slurred) Yeah, you. You think I’m afraid of you?
He steps back from the boards, swaying unsteadily.
Spike: We were happy! You brainwashed her. I could just…
He looks at his bottle and takes a long drink. When it’s empty he tosses
it aside in a huff.
Spike: Yeah, I’ll show you who’s a cool guy. (starts to leave) You’re
In his drunkenness he trips over one of the flower beds, falls into it
and passes out.
Cut to dawn. The first red rays of the sun appear over the hills and
shine into the atrium. Spike lies in shadow, but his left hand is
extended away from his body, and a beam of light nears it as the sun
rises. Soon his hand is fully exposed to the light and it begins to
smoke. A couple of seconds later it bursts into flame. The new light
source shines into Spike’s face, and he wakes and sees his hand aflame.
He leaps to his feet and runs over to the fountain, screaming all the
way. He holds his hands under it, but it’s going at just a trickle.
Quickly he bends down and jams his hand into the pool of water at its
base, dousing the flames. No sooner is that problem gone than he
realizes he’s standing in shaded but direct sunlight, and he’s beginning
to smoke elsewhere. He pulls at his heavy overcoat, trying to shade his
face, as he scrambles up the stairs and out of the atrium.
Cut to inside Spike’s car. The rear driver’s side door whips open and
Spike dives in, right on top of a huge pile of empty beer cans, liquor
bottles and other trash. He quickly slams the door shut and grabs a
bottle from the front seat. He pulls the cork out with his teeth and
pours a generous splash over his burned hand. He grunts loudly in pain
and takes a good drink. The immediate emergency taken care of, he
relaxes a bit and tries to catch his breath.
Spike: This is just too much.
Cut to a small magic shop. The shopkeeper hears the rear door close and
goes to investigate. There she finds Spike looking through one of her
Shopkeeper: Did you come in through the back?
Spike: Yeah. I need a curse.
Shopkeeper: A what?
Spike: (exasperated) A curse! Y’know, something nasty. Boils. I wanna
give him boils all over his face. You know, dripping pustules. Let’s
really go for the gusto here.
Shopkeeper: I’m hearing a lot of negative energy, and I bet…
Spike: (interrupts) Leprosy! Alright, a spell that makes his parts fall
off. That sounds proper.
Shopkeeper: We don’t carry… (the front door chimes) leprosy.
She turns to see Willow come in through the front door.
Shopkeeper: Would you excuse me a moment?
She goes to help her new customer.
Shopkeeper: Blessed be. Anything in particular I can help you find?
Willow: Yeah. (holds up her notepad) It’s all here on the list. (reads
down the list) Skink root, essence of rose thorn, canary feathers…
Shopkeeper: Aha! (smiles) A love spell. Want that old lover to come
back to you? (Spike is suddenly interested in their conversation) Are
you sure you know what you’re doing, hon?
Willow: (flustered) No. Oh, I mean, yes! I… I know how to do a love
spell, but this is more of an anti-love spell. Yeah. Uh, kind of a de-
lusting. The supplies are basically the same, right?
Shopkeeper: (smiles) Basically. (starts to gather things) Although
raven feathers tend to breed a little more discontent than canary. Let
me just get some things…
She gathers some bags of herbs, jars of root powders, a feather and
whatever else and brings them all to the counter. Spike watches intently
from behind the bookcase.
Shopkeeper: Okay. Mm-hmm. (adds it up) That’ll be $15.80 for the lot.
She bags it all while Willow pulls out her money.
She takes the bag and leaves. The shopkeeper turns her attention back to
Spike and walks back to where she left him.
Shopkeeper: (smiling) So, did you find a spell book?
Spike jumps out from behind the bookcase all vamped out and grabs her
around the neck. The shopkeeper gasps in fright, but can’t bring herself
Spike: Forget the book.
He leans in for the bite, and they collapse to the floor. When he’s
sucked her dry he looks back up at the door where he saw Willow go.
Spike: I just got a better idea.
~ ~ Part 2 ~ ~
Sunnydale City Hall. Cut to the Mayor’s office. The camera is low to the
floor. Mayor Wilkins is practicing his putting in the company of his
assistant Allan. He taps the ball, and it comes at the camera in a
nearly perfect straight line, just missing its target.
Mayor Wilkins: Oh, look at that! Every time, cuts to the left.
He gets down on his hands and knees to check the lie of the floor.
Mayor Wilkins: See, and it’s not the carpet. It’s me. (gets up to
retrieve his ball) I swear, I would sell my soul for a decent short
game. (drops the ball for another try) Of course, (chuckles) it’s a
little late for that. (chuckles) (to Allan) I don’t suppose I could
offer your soul, huh? Really help me on the green.
Allan gives him a shocked look.
Mayor Wilkins: I’m just funning. So, we have a Spike problem, do we?
(takes another shot)
Allan: He’s been spotted back in town.
The Mayor’s shot is on target this time, but comes up short. He lets out
a frustrated sigh and goes to retrieve his ball.
Allan: And there was an incident at a magic shop in broad daylight.
Police had a hell of a time covering it up.
Mayor Wilkins: (drops the ball) (laughs) Well, yes, y’know, he was up
to all sorts of shenanigans last year. We had a world of fun trying to
guess what he’d do next.
Allan: I remember. (leans against the Mayor’s desk)
The Mayor whistles at Allan, who immediately stands back up.
Mayor Wilkins: But I guess we’re past that now. This year is too
important to let a loose cannon rock the boat.
Allan: Should I have Mr. Trick send a… committee to deal with this?
Mayor Wilkins: Loose cannon. Rock the boat. Is that a mixed metaphor?
Allan: (confused) Uh…
Mayor Wilkins: (musing out loud) Boats did have cannons. And a loose
one would cause it to rock. Oh, honestly. I don’t know where my mind
goes these days. (chuckles) Why don’t you take care of that Spike
problem? A committee, like you said.
Allan: As good as done. (leaves the office)
Mayor Wilkins: That’s swell. Fore!
He takes another shot, and this one is directly on target. He spreads
his arms, elated.
Mayor Wilkins: Hey!
Cut to Angel’s mansion. He places another log on the fire. Buffy is on
the couch with a pile of brochures on her lap.
Angel: College, huh?
Buffy: Higher education. Kind of an intense proposition.
Angel: Where do you wanna go? (slowly comes over to her)
Buffy: (closes her brochure) I have no idea. My mom was the one that
got all these. She’s so excited, she can’t stop talking about it. (Angel
sits across from her) I had a really hard time coming up with an alibi
so I could come over here.
Angel: She doesn’t know about me.
Buffy: Big no. She’s having enough trouble dealing with the Slayer
issue. I don’t think she’s ready to process the information that… you
and I are friends again. Anyway, I think this college jones is just a
reaction to the whole Slayer thing.
Angel: She wants you to get out.
Buffy: Someplace a little less Hellmouthy. (nods) She has a point.
(draws a breath) Y’know, but there are reasons to stay, too.
Angel: What are they?
Buffy: (taken aback) Um… you know, there’s my Slayer duties,
obviously. What do you think I should do?
Angel: As a friend, I… (stands up) I think that you should leave.
(goes to the fireplace) This is a good opportunity for you.
He leans against the cold stone, facing away from her. Buffy gets up to
gather her brochures.
Buffy: Yeah. It’s not like there’s any great thing keeping me here.
She stuffs them into her bag. Angel turns around when he hears the
papers rustling. Buffy zips her bag closed and pulls it onto her
Buffy: Thanks for the advice. It’s another perspective to consider.
Angel: Where are you going? You just got here. It’s early.
Buffy: Yeah, well, my mom starts worrying a lot earlier these days.
I’ll stop by soon.
She leaves without looking back. Angel watches until she’s gone.
Cut to the science room at school. It’s dark. Willow is grinding the
ingredients for the anti-love spell in a ceramic bowl. Xander walks into
the dark room and heads toward Willow.
Xander: Whoa! It smells like church in here. (sniffs) No, wait… Evil
Willow: It’s just chemistry stuff. An experiment.
Xander: So you said when you called. Why do I have to be here?
Willow: It’ll help you on the exam. You’re way behind.
Xander: But that’s why you love me, right? (bobs his head) Academically
Willow: (ignores his comment) Here. (hands him a raven feather) Hold
Xander: A feather. And who will I be tickling?
He runs it along Willow’s check, and for a moment she enjoys it and
giggles, but her rational mind quickly takes over and she gruffly nudges
his hand aside.
Willow: (warningly) Shush.
Xander isn’t too happy about that, but knows it has to be that way.
Willow checks her spell book.
Willow: Okay. Bring mixture to a boil…
She lights the Bunsen burner below a flask of liquid.
Xander: I assume this isn’t going to make us late for our evening of
Willow: (jerks up) There’s no magic! I mean, bowling, yeah. Cordelia
and Oz are gonna meet us here later.
Xander: Can we turn these lights on?
He notices something familiar about the book Willow is working from and
steps around her to get a better look.
Xander: Is that a spell book?
Willow: (tries to obscure it with her hand) No, no, no! Chemistry book.
Xander: Wait a minute. This is love spell stuff! You’re doing a love
Willow: No! Of course not! This is a purely scientific…
Xander picks the book up and shows her its title: “Witchcraft”.
Willow: …de-lusting spell… for us. I thought it would go better if
you didn’t know.
Xander: (raises his voice) Are you nuts, or have you forgotten that I
tend to have bad luck with these sorts of spells?
Willow: (raises hers back) But you said you wished that these feelings
could just go away.
Xander: Yeah, I wish for a lot of things! I told you I wished I was a
fireman when we were in sixth grade, but you didn’t follow through on
Willow: I can’t do this anymore, Xander! I mean, this whole ‘us’ thing
Xander: So, do you really need to resort to the black arts to keep our
hormones in check?
Willow: (calmly) At this point, I’m thinking ‘no’.
Xander: I’m gonna get the lights, (walks) clean this place up before
they get here (clicks them on) and start asking questions.
Spike walks into the room behind him and grabs him around the neck.
Spike starts to choke Xander, who struggles hard, but can’t get free.
Spike: I need to borrow the little girl. You don’t mind, do you?
Xander kicks out with his legs against the wall, and shoves Spike and
himself across the room and into a metal shelf. Spike isn’t fazed, and
throws Xander aside to the floor. He tries to get up, but Spike punches
him hard. Willow grabs a microscope and comes at Spike with it. He stops
her in mid-swing.
Spike: Threatening me? That’s not nice. (Xander gets back up) We’re all
gonna be very best friends.
He yanks the microscope from Willow’s grips and swings it around into
Xander’s temple. The boy goes down, out cold.
Cut to Spike’s factory. Xander is laid out on what’s left of Drusilla’s
bed. Willow nervously sits on the edge, fidgeting with her hands. Spike
dumps a box full of supplies on the bed next to Xander.
Spike: A spell. For me. You’re gonna do a spell for me.
Willow: Uh, what kind of spell?
Spike: A love spell! Are you brain dead? (goes to the dresser) I’m
gonna get what’s mine. (grabs a bottle) What’s mine. (uncorks it) Teach
her to walk out on me.
He takes several good swallows, then looks over at Willow.
Spike: What are you staring at?
Willow: (averts her eyes) Nothing.
Spike: You can do it, right? You can make Dru love me again? Make her
Willow: I-I can try.
Spike: (grabs her neck) What are you talking about, trying? You’ll do
Willow: Yes, I’ll do it!
He lets go of her and breaks his bottle against a bedpost. He grabs her
again and threatens her with the sharp edges.
Spike: You lie to me, and I’ll shove this through your face! You want
Willow: (terrified) No…
Spike: Right through to your BRAIN!
Willow: No, please, no…
He shoves her aside and leans against the bedpost, calming down.
Spike: She wouldn’t even kill me.
He drops the broken bottle, walks around Willow and sits down next to
Spike: She just left. She didn’t even care enough to cut off my head or
set me on fire. (sniffs) I mean, is that too much to ask? You know? Some
little sign that she cared?
He pauses for a moment to inhale and exhale deeply.
Spike: It was that truce with Buffy that did it. Dru said I’d gone
soft. Wasn’t demon enough for the likes of her. And I told her it didn’t
mean anything, I was thinking of her the whole time, but she didn’t
care. So, we got to Brazil, and she was… she was just different. I
gave her everything: beautiful jewels, beautiful dresses with beautiful
girls in them, but nothing made her happy. And she would fliiirt!
(sniffs) I caught her on a park bench, making out with a chaos demon!
Have you ever seen a chaos demon? They’re all slime and antlers. They’re
He looks at Willow’s pretty young face and strokes her silky auburn
Spike: She only did it to hurt me. (he takes his hand off of her) So I
said, ‘I’m not putting up with this anymore.’ And she said, ‘Fine!’ And
I said, ‘Yeah, I’ve got an unlife, you know!’ And then she said… she
said we could still be friends. (leans over and sobs on Willow’s
shoulder) God, I’m so unhappy!
Willow: (tentatively pats his knee) There, there.
Spike: I mean, friends! How could she be so cruel?
He raises his head and looks at her neck.
Spike: Mmm. That smell… Your neck…
He leans in to take a better whiff and then leans back, now in his game
Spike: I haven’t had a woman in weeks.
Willow looks at him and jumps up in fright.
Willow: Whoa! No! Hold it!
Spike: Well, unless you count that shopkeeper. (stands up)
Willow: (panting with fright) Now, now, hold on! I-I’ll do your spell
for you, and, and, and I’ll get you Drusilla back, but, but there will
be no bottle-in-face, and there will be no ‘having’ of any kind with me.
He grabs her by the neck and bends her over, but makes no move to bite
her. Instead he reverts to his human guise.
Spike: Alright. (pushes her away) Get started.
Willow steps around the bed to where Spike dumped the box of supplies.
Willow: Now, I’m not a real witch, you know. I-I don’t know if this is
gonna work right away.
Spike: Well, if at first you don’t succeed, I’ll kill him (indicates
Xander), and you try again.
Willow: (looks through the supplies) This isn’t enough.
Spike: What? (comes toward her)
Willow: (nervously) Well, there are other ingredients, a-and a-a-a
book. I need a, a spell book. This isn’t it.
Spike: You’ve got one, though, at home?
Willow: Not at home. I left it somewhere.
Spike: (gets in her face) Where?
Cut to the library. Buffy is skipping rope. Suddenly Oz and Cordelia
come storming in. Buffy drops her rope and goes to meet them.
Cordelia: Thank God you are here.
Buffy: Yeah! Not all of us have dates tonight.
Oz: Something’s up.
Cut to the science room. The three of them come in and look at the mess.
Cordelia: We were supposed to meet in here. I don’t know what could
Buffy finds Willow’s botched experiment.
Buffy: What is all this stuff? I’m thinking weird science.
Cordelia: Was Willow messing with her magic tricks again? Maybe they
disappeared. Maybe she turned Xander into something ishy!
Buffy: (looks around) Whatever happened, there was obviously a fight.
Oz: I don’t see any blood.
Buffy: Yeah, either they were taken, or they ran, or maybe…
Cordelia: (points) You’re having too many ors! Pick one!
Buffy: I don’t know. I need you guys to find Giles, okay? I’m gonna
look for them. Maybe they didn’t get too far.
Cordelia: Where is Giles?
Buffy: Uh, he’s at a retreat in the clearing in Breaker’s Woods.
Oz: Yeah, I know the spot, but it’s like a forty-five minute drive.
Buffy: So motor!
They all go on their respective missions.
Cut to the library. Buffy strides in and heads straight for the cage and
the weapons cabinet within. She is interrupted by the phone, and rushes
over to the counter to answer it.
Joyce: (through the phone) Hi, Buffy. You still working out?
Buffy: Uh, no, Mom, actually…
Joyce: I was hoping that we could schedule a college talk later
tonight. I admit I… (cut to her in the kitchen) overreacted before.
You don’t have to go all the way across the country. (sits at the
island) I, um, picked up some brochures from some nearby schools, okay?
Buffy: (cut to her) That’s great, but now’s really not a good time…
Spike: (through the phone) Hello, Joyce.
Buffy’s eyes widen with recognition.
Cut to the kitchen. Joyce looks behind her and sees Spike standing in
Cut to the library. Buffy’s expression turns to horror when she realizes
that it’s Spike. She drops the phone and runs from the library as only a
~ ~ Part 3 ~ ~
The kitchen at the Summers house. Joyce picks up the teakettle from the
stove and takes it over to the island, where she pours some into a cup
for Spike to make hot chocolate.
Spike: So I’m strolling through the park, looking for a meal, and I
happen to walk by, and she’s making out with the chaos demon! And so I
said, ‘You know, I don’t have to put up with this.’ And she said,
‘Fine!’ So I said, ‘Fine, do whatever you like!’ I mean, I thought we
were going to make up, you know.
Joyce: (sits across from him) Well, she sounds very unreasonable.
Spike: She is. She’s out of her mind. (sniffs) That’s what I miss most
about her. (smiles)
Joyce: Well, Spike, sometimes even when two people seem right for each
other, their lives just take different paths. When Buffy’s father and
Spike: (interrupts) No, this is different. Our love was eternal.
Literally. (calms down) You got any of those little marshmallows?
Joyce: Well, lemme look.
She gets up to go check.
Cut outside. Angel comes strolling through the neighborhood. He pauses
to glance up into Buffy’s house, and through the open door sees Spike
sitting there with Joyce. Instantly he makes a dead run for the door,
jumps the porch railing and tries to go in, but is surprised to find
himself thrown back. Joyce is startled out of her seat, and she takes a
few steps away. Angel growls at Spike in extreme anger.
Joyce: Oh, my God. Get out of here!
Spike: (gets up behind Joyce, smiling) Yeah. You’re not invited.
Joyce: He’s crazy. He’ll kill us.
Spike: Not while I breathe. Well, actually, I don’t breathe. (taunts
Angel: Joyce, listen to me.
Joyce: You get out of this house, or I will stake you myself.
Spike: You’re a very bad man.
Angel: (seething with anger) Joyce, you can’t trust him. Invite me in.
Spike makes like he’s going to bite Joyce.
Angel: You touch her, and I’ll cut your head off!
Spike: Yeah? You and what army?
Buffy comes up behind him.
Buffy: That would be me.
She knocks Spike onto his back on the island and keeps him pinned there
by the throat.
Buffy: Angel, why don’t you come on in?
He steps in, and Joyce begins to panic.
Joyce: Oh! Oh, no!
She walks around to the far side of the island.
Buffy: You shouldn’t have come back, Spike.
Spike: I do what I please.
Joyce: Okay, I-I’m confused again.
Spike makes a grab for Buffy’s arm. Angel takes Spike’s arm, yanks it
off of Buffy and pins it to the island. Buffy grabs a wooden stirring
spoon and makes a move to stake him.
Buffy: (stays her thrust) You took Willow.
Spike: You do me now, you’ll never find the little witch.
Joyce: (confused) Willow’s a witch?
Buffy: And Xander?
Spike: Him, too.
Joyce: What, Xander’s a witch? I…
Angel grabs Spike by the coat and lifts him off of the island.
Angel: Where are they?
Spike: (shoves Angel off) Doesn’t work like that, peaches. And when did
you become all soul-having again? I thought you outgrew that. (to Buffy)
Your friend’s gonna work a little magic for me. She does my spell, I let
them both go.
Buffy: You’re not famous for keeping your promises, Spike.
Spike: Well, you and your great poof here wanna tag along, that’s fine.
But you get in my way, and you kill your friends.
Cut to Oz’s van. He speeds along the road to Breaker’s Woods.
Cordelia: What if they were kidnapped by Colombian drug lords? They
could be cutting off Xander’s ear right now! Or other parts.
Oz sniffs the air and stops the van.
Oz sniffs the air some more.
Oz: It’s Willow. She’s nearby.
Cordelia: What? You can smell her? She doesn’t even wear perfume.
Oz: She’s afraid.
He puts the van in reverse and backs up a bit.
Cordelia: Oh, my God. Is this some sort of residual werewolf thing?
This is very disturbing.
Oz: I really agree.
He puts the van in drive and turns down a side street.
Cut to an alleyway. Buffy, Angel and Spike come walking out.
Spike: Look, I just need a few supplies, and then I’ll take you to…
(stops and grabs his head) Oh, God.
Buffy: What’s wrong? Not that I care.
Spike: Oh… My head. I think I’m sobering up. It’s horrible. (bends
over) Oh, God. I wish I was dead.
Buffy: (pulls out a stake) Well, if you close your eyes and wish real
Spike: (straightens up) Hey! Back off!
Angel: (gets between them) Buffy, we still need him to find the others.
Buffy: (lowers her stake) Need him? He’s probably just got them locked
up in the factory.
Spike: Well, hey, how thick do you think I am?
Buffy: Fine. Can we just get this over with?
She starts down the road. Spike and Angel follow close behind. When they
reach a corner, Spike has a flashback when he recognizes a bench.
Spike: Oh, God.
Angel: Now what?
Spike: We killed a homeless man on this bench. Me and Dru. Those were
He steps over to the bench and sits on it.
Spike: (chuckles) You know, he begged for mercy, and you know, that
only made her bite harder.
He looks to Buffy and Angel for a reaction, but they just stare back
Buffy: I guess you had to be there.
She continues on her way.
Cut to the magic shop. Buffy kicks the door open and they walk in. There
is yellow police tape stretched across the room, separating the counter
and the shelves of merchandise from the entry area.
Buffy: Your work?
She yanks down the police tape and tosses it aside.
Spike: Here’s your list. (hands it to Buffy)
Buffy: (reads) ‘Essence of violet, cloves…’ Angel?
Angel: Right. (starts to look)
Buffy: ‘Set of runic tablets.’ Spike can get the rat’s eyes.
She and Spike also start looking for ingredients.
Spike: I used to bring her rats. With the morning paper.
Buffy: Great. More moping. That’s gonna get her back.
Spike: The spell’s gonna get her back.
Angel: Lot of trouble for somebody who doesn’t even care about you.
Spike: Shut your gob!
Angel: She really is just kind of fickle.
Spike: SHUT UP!
He runs at Angel, turns him around and punches him in the face. Angel
grabs his arm in mid-swing before he can do it again. Buffy grabs him
from behind, and between her and Angel, Spike gets thrown back, though
he manages to keep his footing.
Spike: (yells) What do you know? It’s your fault, the both of you! She
belongs with me. (sobs) I’m nothing without her.
Buffy: That I’ll have to agree with. You’re pathetic, you know that?
You’re not even a loser anymore, you’re a shell of a loser.
Spike: Yeah. You’re one to talk. (goes back to looking for stuff)
Spike: (faces them) The last time I looked in on you two, you were
fighting to the death. Now you’re back making googly-eyes at each other
like nothing happened. Makes me want to heave. (turns away)
Buffy: I don’t know what you’re talking about.
Spike: Oh, yeah. You’re just friends.
Angel: That’s right.
Spike: (faces them) You’re not friends. You’ll never be friends.
You’ll be in love till it kills you both. You’ll fight, and you’ll shag,
and you’ll hate each other till it makes you quiver, but you’ll never be
friends. (points at his temple) Love isn’t brains, children, it’s
blood… (clasps his chest) blood screaming inside you to work its will.
Neither Buffy nor Angel want to hear this.
Spike: I may be love’s bitch, but at least I’m man enough to admit
He turns his attention back to finding Willow’s ingredients. Buffy’s
eyes almost meet Angel’s, but she quickly averts them. Spike spots what
he’s looking for.
Spike: Hmm! (grabs the bottle) Eye of rat.
Cut to the basement at Spike’s factory. Willow is pounding against the
door with her shoulder, letting out a good grunt each time. After
several hits, she hears Xander moan below. She comes down to the bed to
check on him. The side of his head is covered in dried blood.
Willow: Xander? (sits on the bed) Are you okay?
He tries to sit up.
Xander: Dizzy. (winces) Kind of nauseous, too. Do I remember having a
fight with Spike?
Willow: You do.
He feels the caked blood on the side of his face.
Xander: I won, right? Kicked his ass?
Willow: You were real brave. Do you need to barf?
Xander: No, I’ll be okay. (looks around) Where are we?
Willow: The factory. We’re locked in the basement.
Xander: That burnt-out place in the middle of nowhere? So we’re pretty
much in a ‘scream all you want’ scenario.
Willow: Pretty much.
Xander: Why didn’t he just kill us?
Willow: He-he wants me to do a love spell.
Willow: Drusilla broke up with him.
Xander: Gee, and we had all hoped those crazy kids would make it work.
Willow: He’s out of control. I mean, not that he was Joe Restraint in
the old days.
Xander: (tries again to sit up) So what are our options? (winces)
Willow: Well, I figure either… I refuse to do the spell and he kills
us, or I do the spell and he kills us.
Xander: Give me a third option.
Willow: He’s so drunk he forgets about us, and we starve to death.
That’s sort of the best one.
Xander: Will, we’re not gonna die. (tries to get up, Willow helps) If
he’s so drunk, he’ll get sloppy, and then I’ll make my move. (they
collapse back onto the bed) As long as my move doesn’t involve standing
up or using my limbs, we’ll be okay.
Their fall put them very close to each other, and the temptation to kiss
Willow: We’re not supposed to.
Xander: Exemption for impending death situation.
Willow goes along with that, and they kiss. Xander reaches his arm
around her as he lies back. She puts her arm around his shoulder to hold
him close. Behind them Oz and Cordelia come down the stairs.
Cordelia: Oh, God!
Willow immediately rolls off of Xander, and they see them there.
Xander: Oh, God.
Willow: Oh, God, Oz…
Oz: We have to get outta here.
Cordelia is heartbroken, and runs up the stairs.
Xander: (gets up) Cordy, I…
When she gets just over half-way up, the charred stairs give beneath her
running feet, and she falls into the space below, onto a rubble pile of
old concrete and rebar. Forgetting his pain, Xander scrambles up the
steps, followed closely by Oz and Willow.
They look down at her through the gaping hole.
She barely moves, just turning her head to look up through the hole
Cordelia: (whispers) I fell…
The camera pans from her face over to her abdomen, where a long piece of
rusty iron rebar is protruding from her left side, just under her rib
Cut to the street outside the magic shop. Spike, Buffy and Angel come
out, each holding a bag of love spell ingredients.
Buffy: Okay, Spike, we got the stuff. Where are they?
Spike: What’s your hurry?
Buffy: My hurry is my intense desire to get you out of my life. You
tend to cause trouble.
Spike: I’ll be out of your life in a few short hours. No trouble at
Without any warning they find themselves confronted by one of Spike’s
Lenny: Hello, Spike.
They look around at the gang of vampires surrounding them.
Buffy: No trouble at all.
~ ~ Part 4 ~ ~
The street in front of the magic shop. Buffy, Spike and Angel face off
with Lenny and his gang.
Spike: Lenny. How have you been?
Lenny: Better since you left. You should have stayed gone.
Spike: Is that right? (tosses his bag aside)
Buffy: You know, he was just leaving. (to Spike) Don’t you start
Spike: This pissant used to work for me.
Buffy: (to Angel) The guys are in trouble. We can’t risk this.
Angel: Look, I don’t think we have a choice.
Lenny: You other two can walk away from this.
Spike: (to Buffy) I die, your chums die.
Buffy: (to Lenny) Sorry. We’re staying.
Lenny: Not for long!
Buffy moves first off to her left. Angel reacts instantly and moves off
to his right. Buffy throws her shopping bag at one vampire, catching him
off guard, and does a front snap kick to his gut. He falls immediately.
Another vampire rushes her, and she does a full spinning wheel kick to
A vampire swings at Angel, but he ducks it and punches him in the gut.
Angel turns around and backhand punches another vampire in the face
followed up with an elbow to his gut.
A vampire front snap kicks Spike in the chest, sending him flying onto
the hood of the car and landing hard on his back. Another vampire enters
the fray wielding a length of pipe. He swings it down at Spike, but
Spike rolls out of the way and onto his hands and feet, and hops up onto
the roof of the car.
A vampire gets a firm hold of Angel’s sleeve and twists it around,
forcing him to do a log roll to the ground. He uses his momentum to roll
back up to a standing position. Another vampire lunges at Angel, but he
grabs him and lifts him into the air, sending him head first into a
nearby garbage can. Another vampire runs at Angel from behind, but he
crouches down and sweep kicks him in the legs, making him trip and flip
over into a diving shoulder roll.
Another vamp joins Spike on the roof of the car, but Spike just punches
him dead in the face, and he flies backward onto the hood and windshield
of the car. A second vampire jumps onto the car and tries to get at
A vampire tries to slam Buffy into a low wall, but she uses her momentum
and his leverage to jump sideways over the wall into the outdoor table
area of the Espresso Pump. She lands on a table on her back, rolls off
and comes up in a standing position. A vampire inside the cafe’ rushes
her, and she does a full spinning hook kick, which connects with his
A vampire swings at Spike, who is still on top of the car, but misses as
Spike redirects the hit, pushes down on his shoulder and kicks him in
the rear, causing him to fall onto the trunk of the car and slide off
Buffy side kicks a vampire in the neck, and he flies backwards into some
A vampire comes straight for Spike. He sidesteps him and sticks his arm
straight out, which the vampire runs right into, causing him to flip
underneath the arm, land on the hood of the car and roll off.
A vampire swings at Angel with a pipe, but misses. On the next swing,
Angel grabs hold of the pipe and twists it around, wresting it from the
vampire’s grip and knocking him out cold. Angel spins halfway around and
slams the end of the pipe into another vampire’s crotch. The force of
the blow lifts him from the ground. Angel drops the pipe and punches the
vampire in the face, sending him spinning to the pavement.
A vampire jumps over a chain into the cafe’. Buffy sees him coming,
grabs a round metal table and swings it at him, smacking him hard in the
face and knocking him to the floor. Buffy looks around for a weapon and
spies a mop by the wall. She stomps on the base, breaking the mop head
off and leaving her with a long wooden pole. As a vampire attacks again,
she swings the pole at his stomach, and he falls to the floor. As the
other one tries to get up again, Buffy slams the pole down onto his
face, sending him back to the floor also.
Spike has a vampire by both arms and twists him around, making him fall
in a spin onto the roof of the car and then roll off onto the sidewalk.
Behind him another vampire jumps up onto the hood of the car with a
length of pipe.
Buffy swings her pole at a vampire and gets him in the stomach. Spinning
around to face another one, she slams the pole into his head and
roundhouse kicks him in the side, sending him stumbling into a wall. A
third vampire jumps in and tries to front snap kick her. His kick is too
weak and she’s able to block it with her pole. Then she thrusts it up
into his neck and throws him to the wall as well. He lands against the
other vampire, and Buffy shoves her makeshift stake through both of
them. She lets go of the pole and runs out of the cafe’ as they
simultaneously explode into ashes.
Angel has a firm grip on a vampire’s collar and punches him hard in the
face, sending him spinning wildly to the ground.
They all notice that they are temporarily without opponents, and so
regroup in front of the magic shop, but it doesn’t take long for several
members of the gang to surround them. Buffy makes a break for the shop’s
door while Angel and Spike slowly back in that direction as well. At the
last instant they also run into the shop and slam the door closed as the
gang of vampires gives chase.
Once inside, Buffy heads behind the counter to see what she can find for
a weapon. Spike and Angel grab one of the bookcases and slide it over
against the front window. Behind the counter Buffy smashes the
shopkeeper’s chair, and picks up the legs to use as stakes. She comes
back out from behind the counter and yells for the others to join her.
She hands them each a chair leg, and the three of them make their stand,
just waiting for the already teetering bookcase to give and the gang to
storm into the shop.
Spike: This should be a kick.
Buffy: I violently dislike you.
Suddenly the back door is kicked in, and a vampire comes in. Angel turns
and attacks. The vampire lunges at him, but Angel ducks and gets
underneath him, lifting him and sending him flying over his head and
onto a table arrayed with books and candles. Two more vampires rush in
and make their way toward Buffy. Angel slams the back door closed, and
leans against it.
Buffy push kicks the rolling ladder used to reach the upper shelves, and
it smashes into the two vampires coming at her, knocking them to the
The first vampire is off of the table and tackles Spike into a wall of
shelves filled with jars. Several of them break and Spike and the jars
go crashing to the floor. Angel struggles to keep the door closed. One
of the vampires who came after Buffy swings at her, but he misses as she
steps behind the sliding ladder. He punches again, this time through the
rungs, but she sidesteps it.
Cut to the factory. Xander slowly climbs down into the hole to be with
Willow: Be careful.
Willow: Don’t move, Cordy! Oz went to get help!
Xander gets through and drops himself down to the concrete below.
Cut to the magic shop. Buffy grabs the arm that the vampire punched
through the rungs of the ladder and holds onto it as she swings her
stake home. She pulls it back out and lets go, and he bursts into ashes.
She then turns her attention to her other attacker and roundhouse kicks
him in the face as he’s trying to get up. She grabs him by the shirt and
shoves his head into a display case, breaking the glass, then yanks him
up through the glass top as well. She pulls the dazed vampire around and
shoves his head between the rungs of the ladder and push kicks it away.
The back door is beginning to give, and so is the bookcase at the front
Buffy: (to Angel) We need to get out of here!
Angel: Can we get to the roof?
Buffy scans the ceiling for a possible way out. Just then the back door
finally gives. Angel is knocked to the floor, and the heavy door falls
on top of him. Lenny steps on top of it, scans the room quickly and
heads straight for Spike. Behind him another vampire runs in, and Buffy
rushes to engage him. She roundhouse kicks him in the face and tries to
follow up with a backhand punch. He blocks the hit and wraps his arm
around hers and yanks her arm downward. She yanks back up and pulls her
arm free, and punches him twice in the face. Angel lies dazed under the
door. Lenny reaches Spike and immediately punches him hard in the face,
making him jerk aside but not fall.
Lenny: Yeah. I heard you’d gone soft. Sad to see it, man.
Spike: (incredulous) Soft?
Lenny: Yeah, like baby food.
Behind Spike the vampire he’d been fighting gets up.
Spike: (smiling) Well, then, let’s give baby a taste.
He does a back kick hitting the vampire behind him in the groin. Lenny
tries to punch, but Spike ducks and punches him instead. Spike spins
around and backhand punches the vampire behind him in the face, who
falls immediately. He ducks another punch from Lenny, grabs onto his
jacket, pulls him around roughly and smashes his face into the table.
Buffy punches her vampire in the gut and high punches him in the face.
While he’s stunned, she grabs onto his head and yanks it around and down
to her left side, flipping him over onto his back. She runs over to
Angel, pushes the heavy door off of him and helps him up.
Angel: I’m alright.
Buffy: You’re not up to your full strength yet.
He sees the bookcase at the front window shake violently.
Angel: That window’s about to go.
He spies what may be the answer.
On a shelf they see several dozen small bottles of Holy Water.
Cut to Spike repeatedly smashing Lenny’s head onto the table.
Spike: Baby like his supper? Baby like his supper?
He lifts Lenny and flips him over onto the table on his back.
Spike: Why doesn’t baby have a nap?
He raises his stake high and plunges it violently into Lenny’s chest.
Lenny looks stunned as he bursts into ashes. Spike smiles with the
thrill of the kill. Behind him Buffy yells out a warning.
Buffy: Spike! Get down!
He ducks to the floor as the bookcase at the front finally gives way and
falls with a crash, along with plenty of broken window glass. Spike
looks up to see the vampires storm the shop. They quickly realize their
peril as Buffy and Angel begin throwing the bottles of Holy Water at
them like grenades. They break when they hit, spraying the vampires and
burning them. Spike catches some wayward drops and quickly pulls his
coat over his face and stays down. The burning Holy Water soon has the
attacking vampires making a hasty, screaming retreat. Spike stands back
up and watches them run, letting out a breath of satisfaction.
Spike: Now, that was fun.
He faces Buffy and Angel only to get disbelieving looks.
Spike: (smiling) Oh, don’t tell me that wasn’t fun. (chuckles) Oh,
God! It’s been so long since I had a decent spot of violence. (stops and
considers) Really puts things in perspective.
Angel bends over in pain and weakness, and Buffy moves to gently support
Spike: (sarcastically) Oh, yeah. You two. Just friends. No danger
Buffy: Could we just do the damn spell now?
Spike: Oh, sod the spell. (waves it off) Your friends are at the
Buffy and Angel can’t believe their gullibility.
Spike: (smiling) I’m really glad I came here, you know? I’ve been all
wrongheaded about this. Weeping, crawling, blaming everybody else. I
want Dru back, I’ve just gotta be the man I was, (stands proud) the man
she loved. I’m gonna do what I shoulda done in the first place: I’ll
find her, wherever she is, tie her up, torture her until she likes me
He walks past them toward the back door. Just before he goes out he
Spike: (smiles thoughtfully) Love’s a funny thing.
He heads out the back.
Cut to the factory. Cordelia moans as Xander gets down next to her.
Xander: (very worried) Cordy… Please hold on. (strokes her hair)
Cordelia: (weakly) Xander? (looks blankly) I can’t see you…
Her head rolls to the side and she exhales. Xander thinks her lost.
From above Willow sees Cordelia’s body just lie seemingly lifeless.
Cut to a cemetery. A funeral is being held, attended by about twenty-
five people dressed in black. The camera pans down from above as the
priest reads from his book.
Priest: He created all things in order that they might exist. And the
generative forces of this world are wholesome, and there is no
destructive poison in them. For the dominion of Hades is not on Earth,
for righteousness is immortal.
The camera reaches the ground and focuses on Buffy and Willow walking
along a street.
Buffy: So Cordelia’s gonna be okay?
Willow: She lost a lot of blood. None of her vitals were punctured.
Buffy: Has she talked to Xander yet?
Willow: She wasn’t allowed to have visitors at first. He’s gonna see
Buffy: And Oz?
Willow: I never knew there was anything inside me that could feel this
bad. For the longest time, I didn’t know what I wanted. I wanted
everything. And now… I just… I just want him to talk to me again.
Buffy: Just give it some time. And be prepared for some groveling.
Willow: Oh, I’m ready. I’m all over groveling.
Buffy: Good. Because, you know, I hear sometimes it works.
Cut to Cordelia’s hospital room. She is lying awake in bed, her head
facing away from the door. Xander arrives holding a huge bouquet of
flowers and knocks on the door.
Xander: Can I come in?
He gets no response, so he just comes in.
Xander: They wouldn’t let me see you until now.
He lays the bouquet on the table where she can see them.
Xander: Those are flowers.
He sits in the chair next to her bed. She slowly turns her head to face
Xander: Look, Cordy, I want you to know that I…
Cordelia: (weakly) Xander?
Xander: (hopefully) Yeah.
Cordelia: Stay away from me.
She turns her head back. Xander looks down at his lap, then gets up to
go. At the door he looks back one final time, before heading down the
hall. When he’s gone, she begins to cry.
Cut to Angel’s mansion. He sits in the atrium waiting for Buffy to come
visit. When he hears her footsteps he turns to see her step through the
makeshift door and stop just inside the atrium.
Angel: Hey. (stands up) I was wondering when you were coming.
Buffy: I’m not coming back.
Angel just looks at her.
Buffy: We’re not friends. We never were. And I can fool Giles, and I
can fool my friends, but I can’t fool myself. (shakes her head) Or
Spike, for some reason. What I want from you I can never have. You don’t
need me to take care of you anymore. So I’m gonna go.
Angel: I don’t accept that.
Buffy: You have to.
Angel: How can…
He takes a step toward her, and she backs away.
Angel: There’s gotta be some way we can still see each other.
Buffy: There is: tell me that you don’t love me.
Knowing that saying those words would be a lie, Angel instead says
nothing. After a long moment, Buffy turns and goes back into the mansion
and leaves. Angel sits down on the edge of one of the flower beds,
staring sadly out into space.
Cut to Willow’s room. She sits on the floor against her bed, her knees
drawn up to her chest and her toes pointed inward, staring at her PEZ
witch as she idly plays with it.
Cut to the Bronze. Oz sits on one of the pool tables, his guitar in
hand, but unable to play as he, too, stares sadly off into space.
Cut to the library. Xander tries to make himself useful reshelving
books. He takes an armful of them into the cage and sorts them onto the
reshelving cart. He stops for a moment, leans against the cart and
stares out into the room beyond the cage.
Cut to Cordelia’s hospital room. She lies still in her bed with her
right hand against her temple, stroking herself there as she stares
blankly at the ceiling.
Cut to the quad at school. Buffy sits alone at a bench, looking sadly
down at the ground as other students pass by.
Cut to a highway out of town. Spike’s car races by with Gary Oldman’s
version of “My Way” blaring on the radio. Cut inside. Spike rocks along
and screams the lyrics as he smokes and defies the daylight, driving
with only his blackened windows to protect him.
Spike: I plan each charted course / Each little step along the highway
/ And more, much more than this
Cut outside. The car speeds along the nearly empty highway.
Spike: I did it my way