Season 3 | Episode 50 | Doppelgängland

Buffy World is an unofficial Buffy the Vampire Slayer fansite. (I mean, we feel pretty official, but you know… LAWYERS!)

BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER characters and related dramatic works are property of Twentieth Century Fox Film Corporation. This transcript is intended to be used for criticism, comment, and research purposes. The transcript may depict certain copyrighted work that was not specifically authorized to be used by the copyrighted holder, but which we believe in good faith are protected by federal law and the fair use doctrine for one or more of the reasons noted above. So, go on… do some work and make the world a more interesting place! (non-commercially of course!)

Episode Summary

Fed up with life as a mortal, Anyanka begs a demon named D’Hoffryn to create a temporal fold that would allow her to retrieve her powercenter — the necklace she wore around her neck — before it was destroyed.

D’Hoffryn has no interest in helping Anyanka and would rather see her live out the rest of her life as a mortal. Anyanka pledges to find someone who will help her.

Outside of Sunnydale High, Willow hones her pencil-floating skills while Buffy prepares for a traditional Slayer evaluation which Wesley is conducting. Later, Willow is called to Principal Snyder’s office, where another student named Percy West is also waiting.

Percy is one of the star members of Sunnydale High’s basketball team who just so happens to be having trouble in history class. Principal Snyder orders Willow to tutor Percy. Afterwards, Willow and Buffy go to the library.

While Willow heeds Giles’ request to try to access the Mayor’s computer files, Faith returns with Wesley from the physical portion of the tests. Faith takes note of Willow’s computer search, and she later reports it to Mayor Wilkins himself during a tour of Faith’s new apartment.

Decked out with nearly everything she could ever want, the apartment leaves Faith absolutely giddy. Back at Sunnydale High, Willow learns that Oz and his band just returned from an out-of-town gig. Willow tells Oz that she may have wanted to go.

Oz replies with the expectation that Willow wouldn’t have wanted to miss a school day. Spotting Percy, Willow tries to arrange a meeting time for their tutor session. However, Percy has a different game plan which involves Willow doing all of the work for him.

The last straw for Willow comes when Buffy comments on her reliability. Tired of being the goody-two-shoes of the group, Willow stalks off by herself. She runs into Anyanka, who introduces herself as Anya, a friend of Cordelia’s.

Willow’s mood takes a turn for the lighter when Anya asks for her help in performing a spell to create a temporal fold. Anya explains that she wants to retrieve a lost necklace which was a family heirloom.

When Willow and Anya perform the spell, Willow sees visions of the alternate universe that Cordelia visited when she told Anya that she wished Buffy had never come to Sunnydale. Something goes wrong in the course of the spell.

Instead of pulling the necklace out of the alternate universe, the vampire Willow is transported out just moments before Oz could dust her on the jagged wood. While Anya futilely searches for the necklace, Willow leaves her alone to try and figure out what she just saw.

Elsewhere, the Willow from the alternate reality awakens. After night falls, she ventures out onto the streets of Sunnydale. Quickly realizing the vast differences surrounding her, Alterna-Willow heads to the Bronze.

There, she draws stares from everybody in attendance, including Percy West. Provoked by Percy’s arrogance, Alterna- Willow shoves him over the pool table, then grabs him by the throat and tightens her grip. Xander pulls Percy away before noticing Willow’s radical makeover.

Thinking he’s the Xander of her reality, Alterna-Willow pulls him into her arms, running her hands all over his body. It doesn’t take long for her to realize that Xander is still a living, breathing human. Buffy arrives and can’t believe her eyes when she sees Willow.

When Alterna-Willow recognizes Buffy as the Slayer who staked her beloved Xander, she turns and heads for the Bronze’s exit. Buffy tries to stop her, but Willow spins around with vamp face on. She then takes off, leaving Xander and Buffy horrified and speechless.

Outside the Bronze, Alterna-Willow encounters two of Mayor Wilkins’ vampire henchmen, one of whom is named Alfonse. With the help of a little sadistic brutality, Alterna-Willow convinces the vampires to work for her and restore chaos to Sunnydale.

Giles gets the word on Willow’s untimely death from Buffy and Xander. During their lament over the loss of their friend, the Willow of their reality enters the library. Simultaneously confused and happy, Buffy, Xander, and Giles embrace Willow, who by this point is simply confused.

While they tell Willow about her evil twin, Angel enters the Bronze in search of Buffy. As he talks to Oz, Alterna-Willow and her newly-hired cohorts invade the Bronze. After Angel leaves to get Buffy, Alterna-Willow kills and drinks from one of the customers.

Oz tries to make sense of what’s going on, but Alterna-Willow only remembers him as one of the human rebels from her reality. Anya clears up everything for the lost vampire, telling her that the Willow of this reality is the only one who can bring her back to where she belongs.

Meanwhile, Angel reaches the library and walks right up to Buffy, Xander, and Giles. He doesn’t notice Willow standing in the corner as he tells the gang that their friend is dead. Willow makes her presence known, sending Angel into the pits of confusion as well.

Realizing they have to stop whatever’s about to go down at the Bronze, the group leaves the library. Willow, however, is reluctant to kill her alter ago. Remembering the tranquilizer gun, Willow tells the others to go ahead while she heads back into the library.

Before she can get the gun, Willow encounters her mirror image, who has sneaked into the library unnoticed. Intrigued by the idea of occupying a world with her double, Alterna-Willow gets uncomfortably cozy with Willow, who retaliates with a cross.

Alterna-Willow knocks her over the counter. When the vampire circles around the counter, she is greeted by a tranquilizer dart right in the stomach. Buffy and the gang return and lock Alterna-Willow inside the bookcage.

Buffy then comes up with a plan to take care of the vampires in the Bronze. Disguised in the outfit of her other self, Willow prepares to infiltrate the Bronze and trick the vampires into walking outside, one by one, and getting staked by her friends waiting outside.

As Willow enters the Bronze, Alterna-Willow wakes up in her prison. While she notices her own change of clothes, Cordelia enters the library. Alterna-Willow tries to talk her into opening the cage, but Cordy opts to use this opportunity to talk about the secret affair with Xander.

After an eternity of rambling, Cordy finally opens the cage. Hungry for blood, Alterna-Willow chases Cordy through the halls before cornering her in a restroom. Before the vampire can close in for the kill, Wesley appears and fends her off with a cross and holy water.

Thwarted, Alterna-Willow turns around and leaves. Meanwhile, Anya and Alfonse eventually see through Willow’s charade. Willow screams, signaling the others to storm into the Bronze and battle the remaining vampires inside.

During the fight, Alterna-Willow arrives and pins Willow on the stage. After dusting Alfonse, Buffy leaps onto the stage and drives a pool cue towards the vampire’s heart. Willow screams for Buffy to stop, and the Slayer is able to halt her weapon’s descent.

After all of the customers evacuate the Bronze, Alterna-Willow and Anya prepare for another temporal fold. Buffy does not agree with the idea of returning a demon to its own reality where it can kill again. Willow responds by saying that she simply can’t kill her.

Before Willow sits down to perform the ritual, she says her goodbyes to Alterna-Willow, who says hers in a much more touchy- feely way. Afterwards, Alterna-Willow is returned to the alternate reality… only to be grabbed by Oz and dusted on the jagged wood.

The next day, Willow contemplates living up to her good girl reputation and never going out for fun again. When Percy appears with the history paper completely typed out, Willow decides otherwise.

Shooting Scripts

Teaser

(NOTE: this episode will begin with a big-ass “Previously”, depicting the events of episode nine.)
INT. CEREMONIAL CHAMBER – NIGHT (PREVIOUSLY SCENE A)
A dark and maleficent demon, D’HOFFRYN, sits on a stone altar, barely visible in the dim flicker of
candlelight. Kneeling before him is ANYA, dressed in ceremonial robes. Neither of them is particularly
happy.

D’HOFFRYN

Do not ask again! Your powers were
a gift of the lower beings. You have
proved unworthy of them.

ANYA
I was robbed of them!
D’HOFFRYN
By your carelessness.
ANYA

For a thousand years I wielded the
power of the wish. I brought ruin
upon the heads of unfaithful men, I
offered destruction and chaos for the
pleasure of the lowers beings. I was
feared and worshipped across the
mortal globe and now I’m stuck at
Sunnydale High! A mortal! A child!
And I’m flunking math.
D’HOFFRYN

This is no concern of ours. You will
live out your mortal life and die.

ANYA

Give me another chance. You can fold
the fabric of time. Send me back to
that moment and I’ll change it.
I won’t fail again.
D’HOFFRYN
Your time is passed.
ANYA

Do you have any idea how boring
twelfth graders are? I’m getting
my powercenter back. And if you
won’t help me then by the pestilent
gods I’ll find someone who will.

EXT. SCHOOLYARD – DAY
Willow is concentrating intently on something. We hold close on her face as, magically, a pencil floats
up into frame in front of her. Very slowly, the pencil begins to spin.

A WIDER ANGLE shows Willow lying on her stomach in the grass. Buffy is doing sit ups next to her,
talking.

BUFFY

The Watcher council shrink is
heavily into tests. He’s got
tests for everything. T.A.T.’s,
rorschach, associative logic…
(finishes sit ups)
They have that test to see if you’re
crazy that asks if you hear voices or
have ever wanted to be a florist.

WILLOW
(perky)

Oh, I used to — Wait. Florist means
crazy, right? I never wanted to do that.

BUFFY
(re: pencil)
Neat.
WILLOW

Thanks. It’s all about emotional
control. Plus, obviously, magic.
You wanna go to the espresso pump?
Get sugared up on mochas?

Buffy starts packing stuff in a gym bag.

BUFFY

Pass. I’m gonna hit the pool,
do some laps.
WILLOW

And how come all the sudden
calisthenics? Aren’t you sort
of naturally buff, Buff?
(to herself, pleased)
Buff buff!
BUFFY

Well, they’ve really got us running
around on the physical side, too. A
lot of precision training and reflex
evaluation, and I just wanna… do…

WILLOW
… better than Faith?
BUFFY
(contrite)
So very shallow.
WILLOW

Competition is natural and healthy.
And you’ll definitely ace her on the
psyche tests. Just don’t mark the
box that says “I sometimes like to

kill people.”
BUFFY

I know Faith isn’t exactly on the
cover of Sanity Fair, but she’s had
it rough. Different circumstances,
that could be me.

WILLOW
No way.
BUFFY

We can’t control the way we grow up.

WILLOW

No. You’re you. She’s her. Some
people just don’t have that in them.

BUFFY

I’m sorry, I know you hate talking

about Faith…
WILLOW
No, it’s okay.
BUFFY
Really, I —
WILLOW

It doesn’t bother me. I mean it.

BUFFY
Uh, Will?

Will looks at Buffy, who indicates the pencil.
ANGLE: THE PENCIL
is spinning so fast, it’s starting to steam.

WILLOW
Ooh.

She frowns at it, tries a hand gesture — and the pencil rockets away, smashing into something O.S.

BUFFY
Emotional control.
WILLOW
I’m working on it.

BLACK OUT.

END OF TEASER
Act One

INT. SNYDER’S OFFICE – DAY
Snyder sits before Willow and the slack and hulking PERCY, jock extraordinaire.

SNYDER

As far as I’m concerned, this is a
marriage made in heaven. Willow
Rosenberg, despite her unsavory
associations, represents the pinnacle
of academic achievement at Sunnydale
high. Percy West represents a
devastating fast break and fifty
percent from behind the three point line.

WILLOW

I’m not sure I understand the

marriage part.
SNYDER

You’ve got the brains, he’s got the
fast break. It’s a perfect match.

WILLOW

(nervously glancing at Percy)
Match? You want us to breed?

SNYDER

I want you to tutor him. Percy is
flunking history. Nothing seems to
be able to motivate him.
PERCY
Hey, I’m challenged.
SNYDER
You’re lazy, self involved and
spoiled. That’s quite the challenge.
But we need a winning year,
especially after last year’s debacle
with the swim team. Can’t have our
point guard benched.
(to Willow)

So you are going to take on a little
teaching job. I know how you enjoy teaching.

WILLOW

But I have a lot of work of my own —

SNYDER

You’ve gotten a letter of acceptance
from every university with a stamp.
I think your academic career is safe.

WILLOW
Yes, but I still have classes
and I don’t want —
SNYDER
Rosenberg. It’s time to give
something back to the community.
I know you want to help your
school out here. Ask me how I know.

WILLOW
How do y–
SNYDER
I just know.

The threat is really only in his eyes. Willow looks at him, and at Percy. Percy just looks bored.
INT. LIBRARY – DAY
Willow enters with Buffy.

BUFFY

So he threatened you? With what?

WILLOW

It wasn’t anything exactly that he
said. It was all in his eyes. I

mean, there was some nostril work
as well, but mostly eyes.
BUFFY

Snyder needs me to kick his ass.

WILLOW

Oh, no, Buffy, don’t get yourself in
trouble. I’ll be okay. I just hate
the way he bullies people. He just
assumes their time is his.
GILES
(entering from his office)
Willow, get on the computer. I want
you to take another pass at accessing

the Mayor’s files.
WILLOW
Okay.

Faith enters with a winded Wesley.

FAITH
Well, that was a blast.
GILES
How did it go?
FAITH

Princess Margaret here had a little
trouble keeping up.
GILES
(to Wesley)
How did it go?
WESLEY
Faith… did quite well on the
obstacle field. And her… reflexes
are improving rapidly. Physically…
(pointedly emphasized)
she’s in good shape. Still a little
sloppy, though.

He hands Giles a clipboard of times.

GILES

Do you feel up to taking Buffy out,

or shall I?
WESLEY
No, I’ll be fine. I just need a
minute. And some defibulators, if
it’s not too much trouble.
BUFFY
I better change.
FAITH

You’re gonna love it, B. It’s just
like fun, only boring.
GILES

Faith, The evaluations are a
necessary part of —

FAITH
(contrite)

Hey. I know. I’m on board here.
Just shooting my mouth off.

As Buffy passes to go out, she and Faith lock eyes. Faith says quietly and sincerely:

FAITH
Good luck.

Touches Buffy’s arm as she passes. Buffy smiles kindly at her, exiting.
Faith wanders over to Willow as Giles and Wesley retreat into the office. Willow is not wildly comfy
around Faith, but acts with strained politeness.
FAITH
Whatchya doing?
WILLOW

I’m trying to access the Mayor’s
personal files.
FAITH
Can you do that?
WILLOW
He’s got some pretty tricky
barriers set up.
FAITH
Can you get past ’em?
WILLOW
Eventually. I’ll get through.

INT. FAITH’S NEW APARTMENT – DAY
The Mayor stands before us, taking in the news.
MAYOR

Well, that’s very interesting.

Faith is looking around, blown away by the place.
FAITH

Yeah, I thought so too. Are you
serious about this place?
MAYOR

Of course I am! No Slayer of mine is
going to live in a fleabag hotel.
That place has a very unsavory
reputation. There are immoral
liaisons going on there.
FAITH
Plus all the screwing.
But this is the kick!
MAYOR

We’ll keep your old place, in case
you need to see your friends there.
But from now on —
Faith has run to the bed, is jumping up and down on it.

MAYOR
Shoes! Shoes!

She jumps off, landing in front of him.

FAITH
Thanks, sugardaddy.
MAYOR

Oh! Faith. I don’t find that sort
of thing amusing. I’m a family man.
Now. Let’s kill your little friend.

Faith looks a little hesitant at this.

MAYOR

Oh, don’t worry. I wouldn’t ask you,
not this early in our relationship.
I think a vampire attack would look
less suspicious anyway.

Faith nods, still not saying anything.

MAYOR

In the meantime, let’s take a look at
the rest of the place. If I’m not
mistaken, some lucky girl has herself

a playstation.
FAITH
No way!
MAYOR
Yes way.

He leads her towards the other room.
OMITTED
INT. SCHOOL HALLWAY – DAY
Willow is there. Oz approaches.

OZ
Hey, Baby.
WILLOW
Oz. Hi.
OZ

There’s something about you that’s
causing me to hug you.
(which he is)

It’s as if I have no will of my own.
She hugs him back perfunctorily. They start for the grassy fountainy area.

WILLOW
Where were you yesterday?

OZ

We got back late, sort of very.

WILLOW
We? Who? Where?

OZ

The Band. We had a gig in
Monterrey Sunday night.
WILLOW

You did? How come I didn’t know?

OZ
I thought you did…
WILLOW

Maybe I would have liked to go.

OZ

Didn’t figure you for missing school.

WILLOW
You think I’m boring.
OZ
I’d call that a radical
interpretation of the text.
We’re playing the Bronze tonight.

WILLOW

I can’t. I have too much homework.

OZ

Well, you’ll be there in spirit.
If you get done early.

He goes in a classroom. Willow goes outside.
EXT. STEPS TO FOUNTAIN QUAD – DAY
Willow catches up with Percy.

WILLOW

Percy! Hey. Listen, why don’t we
get together at lunch and we can go
over your Roosevelt paper, what books
you’ll need and stuff.
PERCY

What are you talking about?
WILLOW

Tutoring you. The history paper?

PERCY

Snyder said you were gonna do it.

WILLOW
He never said that.
PERCY

What meeting were you in?
WILLOW
Look, I’ll pick up the books.
Just meet me at lunch and we’ll —

PERCY
I don’t have time at lunch.
I have to hang out.

WILLOW
Oh. Well…
PERCY

What, you got something better to do?
Just type it up and put my name on
it. And don’t type too good. Dead giveaway.

He bails. Willow sits, unable to shake her crankiness as she goes through her lunchbag. She pulls out
a banana.

WILLOW

I’m gonna eat this now. It’s not
lunchtime and I don’t even care.

Buffy and Xander come happily up to her.

BUFFY
Hey!
XANDER

Willow! Did you remember to tape
Biography last friday?
WILLOW
Uh huh.
BUFFY
(to Xander)

What did I tell you? Old reliable.

WILLOW
(bitterly)
Oh, thanks!
BUFFY
What?
WILLOW
Old reliable? Yeah, great!
There’s a sexy nickname.
BUFFY
Oh, Will, I didn’t mean —
WILLOW
No, it’s fine. I’m old reliable.
XANDER

She just meant, you know, the geyser.
You’re like a geyser of fun that goes
off at regular intervals.
WILLOW
That’s old faithful.
XANDER

Isn’t that the dog that the guy has

to shoot —
WILLOW
That’s old Yeller.
BUFFY

Xander, I beg you not to help me.

(to Will)

Will, I didn’t mean it in a bad way.
I think it’s good to be reliable.

WILLOW

Well maybe I don’t wanna be reliable
all the time. Maybe I’m not just
doormat… person. Homework Gal.

XANDER
I’m thinking nervestrike.
She’s up and ready to head inside. Starts in, turns back.
WILLOW
Maybe I’ll change my look.
Or cut class. You don’t know.
(holds up banana)
And I’m eating this banana.
Lunchtime be damned!

She starts off again, Buffy coming up to her.
BUFFY

Willow, I really didn’t mean —

WILLOW
(not unkindly)
Buffy, I’m storming off. It doesn’t
work if you come with me.
BUFFY
Oh.

She lets her go.
INT. SCHOOL LOUNGE HALL – DAY (PREVIOUSLY SCENE B)
Willow comes grumpily inside, starts heading up the stairs.
ANYA
Willow?

Willow turns, sees Anya coming up the steps. Willow comes back down a few, clearly not that familiar
with the girl.

WILLOW
Uh, hi…
ANYA

Anya. I’m sort of new here.
I know Cordelia…
WILLOW
(deadpan)
Ooh, fun.
ANYA

Listen, I have this little project
I’m working on, and I heard you were
the person to ask —
WILLOW
Uh huh. That’s me.
Reliable dog geyser person.
(resigned)
What do you need?

ANYA

It’s nothing big. Just a little
spell I’m working on.

Willow perks up.

WILLOW

A spell? Ooh. I like the black arts.

ANYA

Yeah. I need a secondary to create
a temporal fold. I heard you were a
pretty powerful wicca, so…
WILLOW

You heard right, mister. I’m always
ready to work some dark mojo. So tell me…

(sly smile)
… is it dangerous?
ANYA
Oh, no.
WILLOW
(disappointed)
Well, could we pretend it is?

INT. CLASSROOM – NIGHT
We are close on a spell set-up that sits on the floor. In the middle of the usual accoutrement is a
white plate on which is a finger painted representation of a necklace.
The camera pulls out to find Anya and Willow finishing the set up. The desks have been pushed away
from the center of the room, forming a rough circle around the circle of majick. Anya is taking
colored sand and funneling it into a small glass vial with a paper funnel. Willow is laying bones and
whatnot about.

ANYA

The necklace was a family heirloom.
Passed down for generations, then it
was stolen from my Mom’s apartment.

WILLOW
How does the spell work?
ANYA

We both call on Eyrishon, the endless
one. Offer up the standard supplication.
Then there’s a teensy temporal fold –
we hope — I pour the sacred sand on
the representation of the necklace
and Eyrishon brings it forth from
the time and place where it was lost.

WILLOW
Cool.
ANYA

Of course, there’s a lot of theory
there, but I figure it’s worth a
shot. Are we ready?
WILLOW
I think so.

They sit facing each other, cross-legged in the circle. Close their eyes. Anya begins, holding out her
right hand, palm up.

ANYA

Eyrishon. K’shala. Meh-uhn.

Willow does the same gesture.

WILLOW

Diprecht. Doh-tehenlo Nu-Eyrishon.

ANYA
The child to the mother.
WILLOW
The river to the sea.
Anya holds out the vial. Willow wraps her hand around Anya’s.
ANYA

Eyrishon. Hear my prayer.

A moment. Nothing.
Then LIGHT, streaming from the ceiling, wrapping the girls in electric auras. Willow is jolted —
transfixed. This is more than she expected.
CLOSE ON: WILLOW’S EYES
As they suddenly jolt open.
WHITE OUT.
Images flash before us, rapidfire, distorted. Images from the alternate universe from episode nine:
Anyanka and Giles. Vampire Willow (heretofore referred to as Vampwill) fighting Buffy. Buffy killing
Xander. The necklace. And others, so fast we can’t even register them.
Willow is shaking, so is Anya — a huge thunderclap and Anya turns the sand vial over.
CLOSE ON: WILLOW’S LEG
As it is jolted, kicks out, knocking the plate aside and the sand pours onto the leg instead, the frame
WHITES OUT again…
INT. THE PLANT (ALTERNATE UNIVERSE NEW FOOTAGE) – NIGHT 9
We see Vampwill about to be impaled By Oz — and she disappears. Oz looks about him, confused.
INT. CLASSROOM – NIGHT
The light is suddenly sucked back and the girls break apart, breathing hard. Willow is more than a
little freaked.

WILLOW
What was that? That was –
what was that?
ANYA

(looking for her necklace)
It’s not here. It’s not here!
WILLOW
Okay, that’s a little blacker
than I like my arts.

ANYA

Oh, don’t be such a wimp.
WILLOW

That wasn’t just a temporal fold,
that was some weird Hell place.
I don’t think you’re telling
me everything.
ANYA

I swear, I’m just trying to find
my necklace.
WILLOW
Did you try looking inside
the sofa in HELL?
ANYA

Look, we’ll try again, and if —

WILLOW
I think emphatically not.
ANYA
I can’t do it by myself!
WILLOW
Well, that’s a relief.
I’m out of here.
ANYA
Fine. Go! Idiot child.

Willow grabs some spell stuff.

WILLOW

I believe these chicken bones are
mine. Magic is dangerous, Anya.
It’s not to be toyed with. Now if
you’ll excuse me, I have someone
else’s homework to do.

She strides out, leaving Anya desolate in the midst of her failure. Anya picks up the plate —

ANYA
Nothing. Nothing!

She throws the plate to the ground, smashing it.
INT. THE PLANT – NIGHT
It’s the same plant from the alternate universe, but dark and abandoned. The moment we see it
Vampwill’s face rears into frame, incohately hissing with pain.
We find her on the ground, smoke surrounding her. As it clears she gets her bearings, looks around.
Looks very confused.

VAMPWILL
This is weird.

BLACK OUT.

END OF ACT ONE
Act Two

EXT. SUNNYDALE STREET – NIGHT (PREVIOUSLY SCENE C)
Vampwill walks down the street, befuddled by what she sees. What she sees is people: happy,
normal people. Families with kids. Couples. Even OLD people, walking around with a distinct lack of
terror.
It bothers her.
She passes the movie theatre as people pour out. Passes the Espresso Pump as people eat, drink and
be annoyingly merry.
She looks increasingly lost, vulnerable. An old woman comes up to her, asking politely:

OLD LADY
Excuse me, young lady —

And Vampwill whips her head around and GROWLS at the old lady, who promptly backs off.
Fed up, will heads for:
INT. BRONZE – NIGHT
This is the worst of all. Her usual vamp headquarters is filled with living humans, and the pulse
pounding beat has been replaced by the mellow song stylings of K’s Choice.
Vampwill wanders about, looking for the master, or some sign of sanity. Instead, she bumps into:

PERCY
Hey!

She looks at him, no idea who he is.

PERCY

Rosenberg? What are you doing?
Trick-or-treating?

She looks him over, amazed at his audacity.

PERCY

You’re supposed to be at home doing
my history report. I flunk that class
you’re gonna be in big trouble with
Snyder. Till we graduate, I OWN your ass.

VAMPWILL
Bored now.

She rockets the heel of her hand into his chest. He flies backwards over the pool table, landing just
about as painfully as he can. While he groans and struggles to get up, she circles the table lazily.

VAMPWILL
(pouty)
I’m having a terrible night.
She grabs him by the throat and pulls him up. Eyes him seductively.

VAMPWILL
Wanna make it better?

He takes a swing at her but she blocks it. Continues to squeeze his neck. He tries to put his hands
around hers, but his strength is failing.
People have backed off, are watching in horror (or in some cases, mild interest). Xander pushes
through the throng.

XANDER
What’s going on? Is there
a funny thing?

He sees Vampwill and Percy, and of course completely misinterprets the situation.

XANDER
Whoah!
He plows forward, pulling them apart and facing Percy.
XANDER

Back off! You stay the hell away

from her!
PERCY
(stunned)
Okay. Sure.

He bails from the Bronze. Xander turns back to Vampwill and gets his first real look at her, as she
gets a look at him.

VAMPWILL
Xander…
XANDER
Will. Changing the look not
an idle threat with you.
VAMPWILL
You’re alive!
She comes at him, embraces him very sensually.
XANDER

Uh, Will, this is verging on naughty
touching here. We don’t want to fall
back on bad habits — Hands! Hands

in new places.

He takes her hands, holds them away from new places. She sniffs him, frowning, and pulls away.

VAMPWILL
You’re alive.
XANDER
You mentioned that earlier.
Will, are you okay?
VAMPWILL
No. Everything’s different.

Buffy works through the crowd.

BUFFY
Xander, there you are.
XANDER
(eyes on Will)
Hey, Buff.
BUFFY

Aren’t you going to introduce me to
your — holy god you’re Willow.

VAMPWILL
(eyes narrowing)
You…
BUFFY

Okay, well, you know what? I like
the look. It’s extreme, but it looks
good, it’s a leather thing, it’s
very… I said extreme already, right?

VAMPWILL
I don’t like you.
BUFFY

Will, I’m sorry about today. You
know how my foot likes to be in my
mouth sometimes, but you really don’t

have to prove–
VAMPWILL
Leaving now.
XANDER

Willow, I gotta say I’m not loving

the new you.
Vampwill ignores him, turns away. Buffy tugs at her arm.
BUFFY
Willow, wait —
Vampwill spins and is in VAMPFACE, snarls at her:
VAMPWILL
Get off me!

She snaps her head back, normal faced once more, and stalks out of the Bronze.
Neither Buffy nor Xander can speak.
EXT. ALLEY – NIGHT (PREVIOUSLY SCENE D)
Vampwill strides along, grouchy as hell. She gets a ways before she realizes she’s being followed.
Two vamps come out of the shadows. The one who speaks is ALPHONSE.

ALPHONSE
Willow Rosenberg?

She stops, her back to them. She can tell they’re up to no good. Smiles ever so slightly.

VAMPWILL

I’m not supposed to talk to strangers.

ALPHONSE
Then we won’t talk.

They rush her.
And she’s a blur, takes them out in seconds flat. The second vamp finds himself on the ground
several feet away. Alphonse finds himself on his knees, Vampwill twisting his arm painfully.

VAMPWILL
You made me cranky…

ALPHONSE
There’s been a mistake here.
We were sent after a human.
VAMPWILL
Really?
She puts her hand around one of his fingers.

VAMPWILL
Who do you work for?
ALPHONSE
I’m not telling you a thing —

She breaks his finger. Holds another.

VAMPWILL
Who do you work for?
ALPHONSE
Wilkins, the Mayor.

She breaks his finger. Holds another. Again, in the same innocent tone:

VAMPWILL
Who do you work for?
ALPHONSE
You…

She lets him up, as he is joined by his sore companion. No longer playing girlie, Vampwill takes
command.

VAMPWILL

Get your friends. Bring them here.
The world’s no fun anymore. We’re
gonna make it the way it was.
Starting with the Bronze.

INT. LIBRARY – NIGHT
Giles is coming out of the office, speaking to:
GILES

Ah. Buffy. I thought you were going
out tonight, didn’t expect…

Buffy and Xander stare, unable to speak.

GILES
What is it?

INT. SAME – A BIT LATER
Now three people can’t speak. They sit around the table, entirely shellshocked. Finally…

XANDER
This isn’t real.
BUFFY
I can’t feel anything.
Arms or legs or anything…

GILES
(trying not to cry)

She was… truly the finest
of all of us.
XANDER
Way better than me…
GILES
(sadly nodding)
Much, much better.
BUFFY
We just saw her at lunch…
how could…
XANDER
It’s all my fault.
GILES

What makes you say that?
XANDER
I don’t know…
Statistical probability…
BUFFY
(emotion rising)
No, it’s me… it’s me, I called her
reliable, she must have gone out and
gotten attacked which she wouldn’t
have done except I called her
reliable and now my best friend is —

WILLOW
What’s going on?

They all turn to her, stunned, confused.

WILLOW
Jeez, who died?
(serious)
Oh god! Who died?

Xander springs to action, jumping up and grabbing a cross, holding it to Willow. His voice is thick
with emotion.

XANDER
Back! Get back, Demon!

Willow stares at him. He stares at the cross. It’s not working. He pulls it away, shakes it, holds it to
her again.
Buffy has risen more slowly, eyes wet, fearing the hope in her breast.

BUFFY
Willow? You’re alive?
WILLOW
Aren’t I usually?

Buffy runs to her and grabs her in a hug, crying. A moment and Xander joins the hug. Willow can
barely breathe.

WILLOW
I love you guys too…
okay, oxygen becoming an issue…

They let go. She turns to Giles —

WILLOW

What’s going on with these guywHOAH!
— who grabs her in yet another bear hug. Eventually he lets her go.

GILES
Sorry.

Buffy touches Willow’s hair, still so amazed and grateful she’s here.

WILLOW.

It’s nice that you guys missed me.
Say, you didn’t all happen to do a
bunch of drugs, did you?
XANDER

Will, we saw you. At the bronze.

A vampire.
WILLOW
(defensive)
I’m not a vampire.
BUFFY

But you are, I mean you were…
Giles, you planning to step in with
an explanation any time soon?

GILES
(not a clue)
Well, something… something
very strange is happening.
XANDER

Can you believe the Watcher council

let this guy go?

INT. BRONZE – NIGHT
ANGLE: BY THE BAR
Anya sits grumpily down.

ANYA
What a day…

She addresses the WAITER behind the counter.
ANYA
Gimme a beer.
WAITER
I.D.

She stares at him.

WAITER
I.D.
ANYA
(losing it completely)

I’m eleven hundred and twenty years
old! Just give me a friggin’ BEER!

Beat.

WAITER
I.D.
ANYA
Give me a coke.

ANGLE: ONSTAGE
K’s Choice have left. Dingoes Ate My Baby are setting up. Oz and Devon move a heavy amp stage
left (if stage left is the left side from the audience’s pov. Which it might not be.)

DEVON

Man, We gotta get a roadie.
Other bands have roadies.

OZ

Other bands know more than three
chords. Your professional bands can
play up to six and sometimes seven
completely different chords.

DEVON

That’s just like, fruity jazz bands.

Angel mounts the stage.

ANGEL
Oz.
OZ

Hey, man. You looking for Buffy?

ANGEL
As always.
OZ

No sightings as of yet, but I think
she said she’d show.
DEVON

Hey, man, how’d you like to be our roadie?

ANGEL
Less than you’d think.
OZ
Well, stick around,
I’m sure Buffy’ll…
He stops, turning to follow Angel’s suddenly intense gaze.
ANGLE: the back door
is visible from the stage. A VAMP can be seen blocking it, not letting a patron out..
Oz and Angel look at each other. Look at the other exits, including the front door.
There are vampires setting up at every door.
OZ

This doesn’t look good…

At the front door, A male patron tries to push past Alphonse. He throws him onto a table, smashing it
and causing the guy’s date to SCREAM! A murmur rises up as Alphonse steps into the middle of the

room.

ALPHONSE
Everybody, SHUT UP!

Everybody more or less does.

ALPHONSE
All right. Nobody causes any
trouble, or tries to leave,
and nobody gets hurt.

Angle: the stage

ANGEL
Why don’t I believe him?

OZ

Well, he lacks credibility.

ANGLE: ANYA
Also notices the commotion. Is warily intrigued.
Angle: the stage

OZ

Can you get out of here?
ANGEL
(looks around)
Skylight in the roof. I can make it.

OZ

I think we need some back up.

ANGEL
I think I’m needed here.

OZ

Ten to one. Could get pointless.

ANGLE: FEET
Stroll into the bronze. It is no surprise to whom they belong. We arm up to see a slyly grinning
Willow.

WILLOW
Everybody’s all afraid.
It’s just like old times.

ANGLE: OZ
He becomes very still. Even for Oz. Angel is also appalled. Neither takes their eyes off Willow.

OZ
(eyes on Willow)
Get Buffy. Do it now.

Angel slips behind the stack of amps. He starts climbing the rope up against the wall, quickly and
quietly.

DEVON
(quietly)

Dude. Check out your girlfriend.

She moves about the center of the bronze, looking at everyone. Comes to an attractive young
woman, SANDY, at a high table.

VAMPWILL
What’s your name?
SANDY
Sandy…

Vampwill runs her hand down Sandy’s arm. She takes Sandy’s hand in hers and pulls her along with
her like a little girl pulling her baby sister. Sandy is too intimidated to resist.

VAMPWILL
(to the crowd)
You don’t have to be afraid… just
to please me. If you’re all good
boys and girls, we’ll make you young
and strong for ever and ever. We’ll

all have fun.
She stops just behind Sandy. Licks the girl’s neck.
Oz watches intently.

VAMPWILL
If you’re not …

She whips her head around, MORPHING and sinking her teeth into the spot she licked.
Oz starts for her — and a vamp blocks his way.
Vampwill holds Sandy’s bucking body from behind as she drainsthe life out of it. Drops her like a wet
sack and, after a moment of intense pleasure, morphs back. Looks at the crowd.

VAMPWILL
Questions, comments…

For a moment, no one can muster either.

OZ

Willow. You don’t want to do this.

VAMPWILL
I don’t? But I’m so good at it.

OZ
Who did this to you?
VAMPWILL

I know you. You’re a white hat. How
come you’re talking to me like we’re friends?

ANYA

Because he thinks you’re someone else.

Vampwill spins to face Anya, who has stepped forward. Alphonse moves to shut Anya up, but Willow
stops him with a slight wave of her hand.

ANYA

He thinks you’re the Willow that
belongs in this reality.
VAMPWILL
Another me…

ANYA

You know this isn’t your world.
You know you don’t belong here.

VAMPWILL

No… this is a dumb world. In my
world there are people in chains and
we can ride them like ponies.

ANYA

You want to get back there.
VAMPWILL
(pouty)
Yeah…
ANYA
So do I.

INT. LIBRARY – NIGHT
Giles, Buffy, Xander and Willow discuss the New Willow sitch. Will stands by the lectern, just out of
sight of the entrance.

WILLOW

This is creepy. I don’t like the
thought that there’s some vampire
out there that looks like me.
XANDER
Not looks like — is.
BUFFY

It was you, Willow, in every detail.
Except for your not being a
dominatrix… as far as we know.

WILLOW

Oh, right. Me and Oz play Mistress
of Pain every night. Please.
XANDER

Did anybody else just go to scary

visual place?
BUFFY
Oh yeah.

Angel enters hurriedly, moving to Buffy. He looks intense. Even for Angel.

BUFFY
Angel… What is it?
ANGEL

Buffy, I… Something’s happened that…
(doesn’t know how to say it)
Willow’s dead.
(sees Willow)
Hey, Willow.
(turns back to Buffy)

(turns back to Willow)
(turns back to Buffy)
Wait a second.

XANDER

We’re right there with you, Buddy.

BUFFY

We saw her too. At the Bronze.

ANGEL

She’s there now. With a cadre of
Vampires looking to party.
BUFFY

Then we can worry about who she is
after we stop a feeding frenzy.
INT. HALL OUTSIDE LIBRARY – NIGHT (MOMENTS LATER)
The gang comes out with weapons, heads down the hall.
BUFFY
How many are there?
ANGEL
Eight or ten.
BUFFY
(to Giles)
Should we call Faith?
GILES

No. I don’t want her in combat yet.
Not around civilians.
XANDER
Here here.
WILLOW
Guys?

Something in her tone stops them.

WILLOW

What are we gonna do with… me?

Other me.
BUFFY
I don’t know, Will.
We’ve just gotta stop them —

WILLOW

I get that. I just sorta wanna know
what — Oh. Hey! Go. I’ll catch up.

She runs back into the library.
INT. LIBRARY – NIGHT
She leans over the counter, reaching for something she does not find. Straightens up again.
Vampwill grabs her from behind. Hand over mouth. Face right by hers. (greenscreen)

VAMPWILL
Alone at last…

BLACK OUT.

END OF ACT TWO

Act Three

INT. LIBRARY – NIGHT
Right where we left off. Vampwill spins Willow, looks her over, hand at her throat.

VAMPWILL
Well, look at me. I’m all fuzzy.

WILLOW
What do I want with you?
Dyeh, I mean —
VAMPWILL

Your little schoolfriend Anya said
you brought me here. She said you
could get me back to my world.

WILLOW
(gets it)
Oh. Oh. Oops.
VAMPWILL
But I don’t know…

She comes around Willow, checking her out, getting her from behind again.

VAMPWILL

I kinda like the two of us. We could
be quite a team, if you came around
to my way of thinking.
WILLOW

Would that mean we have to snuggle?

VAMPWILL
What do you say…?

She licks Willow’s neck. Willow’s face is a study.
VAMPWILL
…wanna be bad?
WILLOW

This just can’t get more disturbing.

Vampwill smiles, and growls nice and low.
Willow struggles free.

WILLOW
Okay, Ack! Ack! No more!
You’re freaking me out!

She moves for the door, But Vampwill blocks her.
She grabs a cross from the counter and holds it out — Vampwill knocks it from her grasp and grabs
her, hurls her over the counter. She lands in a heap as Vampwill makes her way around, no longer
amused.

VAMPWILL

You don’t wanna play, I guess I can’t
force you. Oh wait. I can.

She comes around and as she does Willow reaches in under the counter for the thing she came here
to get.
It’s the tranquilizer gun. She fires point blank into Vampwill’s chest.
Vampwill looks at the little dart sticking through her corset. Looks at Willow.

VAMPWILL
Bitch…

Vampwill drops. A beat, then Will heads out of the library at top speed.
INT. LIBRARY – LATER
ANGLE: THE CAGE
As Vampwill is dragged into it, still unconscious. The gang has been called back, regard the surfeit of
Willows with varying degrees of wonder.

GILES
Amazing.
WILLOW
It’s horrible. That’s me as a
vampire? I mean, I’m so evil,
and skanky,
(softly, to Buffy)
and I think I’m kind of gay.

BUFFY

Just remember, a vampire’s
personality has nothing to
do with the person it was.
ANGEL
Well, actually —
(off Buffy’s glare)
— that’s a good point.
XANDER
What do we do now?
GILES

We still have to get to the Bronze.

ANGEL

Even if they’re supposed to wait for
her they might start feeding.
Vampires not notoriously reliable.

XANDER

So we charge in, much in the style of

John Wayne?
GILES

High casualty risk. I haven’t any
other plan, though.
BUFFY
I have a really bad idea…

EXT. BRONZE – NIGHT
The group is coming to the entrance as Angel drops down (ostensibly from the skylight) onto some
crates, thence to the ground.

ANGEL

They’re still in a holding pattern.
That’s good; it means they must
really be afraid of you.
He says this to the off screen Willow, whom we then see:
ANGLE: WILLOW
dressed as Vampwill. And clearly deeply uncomfortable in the outfit.

WILLOW
Well, who wouldn’t be?
BUFFY
You okay in that?
WILLOW
It’s a little binding. I guess
vampires really don’t have to
breathe…
Adjusting her corset, she looks down at her sudden cleavage.
WILLOW
Gosh. Look at those.
GILES

All right. You go in, try to defuse
the situation as much as possible.
At least get a few of them to come
outside. Even the odds a bit.

BUFFY

First sign of trouble, you give the
signal. We come in hard and fast.

XANDER
What is the signal?
WILLOW
Me screaming.
ANGEL

Giles, you and Xander wait at the
back entrance.
GILES
Right.
He and Xander take off. Buffy moves to Willow.
BUFFY

You sure you’re up to this?
WILLOW

Well, it was me that started it…
sort of. Don’t worry. I won’t do
anything that could be interpreted

as brave.
BUFFY
We’re right outside.

She and Angel move out of sight as Willow knocks on the door. It opens to reveal an intimidating
vampire. A moment of fear from Willow, and then she composes herself.

WILLOW
Hi, I’m back.

She strides in, trying not to stumble on her platforms, as the vampire deferentially moves aside.
INT. BRONZE – NIGHT
Alphonse and Anya are the only ones who dare approach.
ALPHONSE
Did you find the girl?
WILLOW
Yep, I did.
ANYA
Where is she?
WILLOW
I killed her. And sucked her
blood, as we vampires do.
(to the vamp by the door)
I think maybe I heard something out
there. Why don’t you go check?

He does.
EXT. BRONZE – NIGHT
As he steps out and closes the door behind him, Angel grabs him and Buffy stakes him.
INT. BRONZE – NIGHT

ANYA

How could you kill her? She was our
best shot at getting your world back!

WILLOW

I don’t like that you dare question
me. Maybe I’ll have my minions take
you outside and kill you horribly!

She spies Oz — right after “kill you horribly” she secretly smiles and waves at him.
Oz looks bemused.

ANYA

Vampires. Always thinking
with your teeth.
WILLOW

She bothered me. She’s so weak,
and accommodating. It’s pathetic —
she lets everyone walk all over
her and then she gets cranky at
her friends for no reason. I just
couldn’t let her live.
(to another vamp)
He’s been gone a while. Why don’t
you check on him?
ALPHONSE

Well, boss, since that plan is out,
why don’t we get to the killing?

Off Willow’s look…

INT. LIBRARY – NIGHT
ANGLE: in the cage
Vampwill wakes up, gets her bearings. She looks down at the pink fuzzy attire she’s sporting.

VAMPWILL
This is like a nightmare…

Cordelia enters the library, pretty dressed up.

CORDELIA
Hello, Giles?
(smaller, more hopeful voice)

Wesley?
(fixing her hair)
I just happened to stop by…
for books…
VAMPWILL
Hey, you.
CORDELIA
Hey me? Hey me what?
I have a name, you know.
VAMPWILL
Uh, Cordelia…
CORDELIA
What’d you do? Lock yourself
in the book cage?
VAMPWILL
Yeah. Let me out.
(trying to ape Willow)
I’m so helpless…
CORDELIA
Okay.

She goes behind the counter. Gets the key and comes back around as the conversation continues.

CORDELIA
I think Giles keeps a spare —
yeah. How’d you manage to
lock yourself in, anyway?
VAMPWILL

I was… looking at the books, ’cause
I like books ’cause I’m so shy…

CORDELIA

Yeah, right. The famous shy girl act
all the boys fall for.
VAMPWILL
Open the cage.

Cordelia is about to, but she stops.

CORDELIA
Wait a minute.
Vampwill looks warily at Cordy. Is she on to her?

CORDELIA

It occurs to me that we’ve never
really had the opportunity to talk.
You know, woman to woman, with you

locked up.
VAMPWILL
Don’t wanna talk. Hungry.
CORDELIA

What could we talk about? Hey,
how about the ethics of
boyfriend stealing?

INT. BRONZE – NIGHT
Willow is, well, vamping.

WILLOW

I don’t know if I feel like killing
any more… I’m so bored…

She walks by a girl, sensuously running her hand through her hair — which it then gets tangled in.
She awkwardly extracts it, continuing:

WILLOW

It would be like shooting fish
in a barrel. Where’s the fun?
ALPHONSE
With all due respect, boss,
the fun would be the eating.
WILLOW

Maybe we should let everyone go, give
them a thirty second head start —

ANYA
(gets it)
Wait a minute!
WILLOW
No, I like my plan.
ANYA
Oh, nice try.
WILLOW
Okay, let’s get to the killing.
(re: Anya)
Why don’t we start with her?

ANYA

Why don’t we start with you?
(to Alphonse)

If she’s a vampire, I’m the creature
from the black lagoon.
Willow looks at Alphonse and the other vamps. Tries not to be nervous.
INT. LIBRARY – NIGHT
Cordelia has yet to stop talking. Vampwill just hungrily eyes her neck.

CORDELIA

And, okay, it isn’t even like I was

that attracted to Xander, it was more
just that we kept being in these life
or death situations and that’s always
all sexy and stuff. I mean I more or
less knew he was a loser but that
doesn’t make it okay for you to come
around and — what? Do I have
something on my neck?
VAMPWILL
Not yet…
CORDELIA
(trying to look)
Am I getting a zit?
VAMPWILL

Cordelia, I’m very sorry. I realize
I was wrong. I’ll never steal your
boyfriend again.
CORDELIA
Like you could.

She opens the cage.

CORDELIA

I should just leave you in there.
But I am a great humanitarian and
you’ll just have to think of a way to
pay me back sometime.
VAMPWILL
Okay…

She steps out of the cage in full VAMPFACE.

VAMPWILL
How about dinner?

BLACK OUT.

END OF ACT THREE
Act Four

INT. LIBRARY – NIGHT
As befits a woman in her situation, Cordelia SCREAMS.
INT. HALL OUTSIDE LIBRARY – NIGHT
Cordy comes busting out the doors at a full tear, Vampwill not far behind.
INT. CLASSROOM – NIGHT
Cordy comes in, makes her way through a sea of desks, pushing them in Vampwill’s way.

CORDELIA

I didn’t mean all that stuff I said
before. I want you to have Xander.
My blessings on you both…
VAMPWILL

I’m so over him. I need fresh blood.

She lunges for Cordy, who SCREAMS and makes it to the other exit.
INT. HALL OUTSIDE LIBRARY – NIGHT
Wesley is headed for the library when he hears the scream. He turns and heads down the hall,
pulling a cross from his jacket.
INT. ANOTHER HALL – NIGHT
Vampwill turns a corner to find Cordy cornered.
VAMPWILL
No more hiding…

She moves toward Cordy — and Wesley steps in front of her, holding his cross. She hisses at it,
deeply unhappy.

WESLEY
Back! Creature of the night!
Leave this place!
VAMPWILL
Don’t wanna.

But he pulls a vial of holy water from his other pocket, and that looks a little dicier. A moment, and
she bails, snarling.
Wesley looks cautiously around the corner to see if she’s gone. Cordy comes up behind him and
touches his back. He screams like a woman.

CORDELIA
I’m sorry…
WESLEY
No no. A little on edge.
You know. Men in combat.
Grrrr. Are you all right?
CORDELIA
You saved my life.

Throwing her arms around him isn’t exactly natural at this point, but that doesn’t stop Cordy.

CORDELIA
Oh, thank you!
WESLEY

Yes, well… Was that vampire…

CORDELIA
Willow.
(genuine sadness)
They got Willow.
(over it)

So, you doing anything tonight?

INT. BRONZE – NIGHT
Willow is subtlety backing up under the inspection of Alphonse and Anya.

ANYA

I’m just so tired of being around
humans and all their baggage, I don’t
care if I ever get my power back, I
think he should eat you.

WILLOW

This girl has a history of mental
problems dating back to early
childhood. I’m a blood sucking
fiend! Look at my outfit!
ALPHONSE
A human. I should have
smelled it right away.
WILLOW
A human? Oh yeah?
Could a human do this?

She SCREAMS at the top of her lungs.
There is silence for a moment. Anya and Alphonse look at each other. Talk at once.

ALPHONSE

I’d say — yeah, human could do that.

ANYA
(simultaneously)
Uh huh. Most humans could, yeah …

They both look back at Willow.
Which is when, thankfully, Buffy and Angel burst in.
Let the fighty begin. It maps out essentially thus:
ANGLE: BUFFY
Squares off with Alphonse. Asskicking abounds in the pool table region.
ANGLE: ANGEL
Fights vamps over by the counter.
ANGLE: BACKSTAGE
Giles and Xander rush in, fight the vamp there. Xander holds, Giles kills.
ANGLE: BRONZE PATRONS
Mostly cower. Some flee out the now unguarded door.
ANGLE: ANYA
Sees it’s time to go. Turns to run — right into Willow. A moment, then Willow punches her. She falls,
unconscious as Willow grabs her poor hand.

WILLOW

Ow! Ow! It’s all happy but OW!

Oz grabs her, heads for the stage.

OZ

Come on. Devon! let’s go!

Devon is trying to climb up the ropes Angel used to escape. He’s not getting very far, and he
abandons the effort, following Oz toward the back door.
Oz reaches it first — and finds himself thrown back by Vampwill. He hits Devon on the backwards fly
and they both go down.

So Vampwill faces off with Willow once again. (in Vampface)
VAMPWILL
No more snuggles?

Vampwill launches herself at Willow, and easily overpowers her, Willow hitting the stage on her back
and Vampwill coming in for the throat
ANGLE: BUFFY
Sees Willow’s plight. This gives her the strength to kill Alphonse (possibly with a pool cue). She bolts
for the stage with the broken end of the cue and jumps up, lands behind Vampwill and raises her
makeshift stake, Brings it down —

WILLOW
Buffy, no!

CLOSE ON: THE STAKE
An inch from Yampwill’s back, it stops.
Vampwill looks about her. Her men have fled. Angel approaches, as do the others. She’s licked.
She lets go of Willow, stands up. So does Willow.
WILLOW
(to Buffy)
Nice reflexes.
BUFFY
Well, I work out.

Willow turns to Vampwill. Vampwill looks about her, and back at her counterpart.

VAMPWILL
(pouty)
This world’s no fun…
WILLOW
You noticed that too.

INT. THE PLANT – NIGHT
Oz, Giles, Angel, Buffy, Willow, Xander, Vampwill and Anya. Anya grouchily preps a returning spell,
with Giles’s help. The Willows are back in their own outfits.
Xander sidles up to Vampwill.

XANDER

So, in your reality I’m like this bad
ass vampire, huh? People afraid of me?

She gives a withering look.

XANDER
Oh yeah. I’m bad.
BUFFY
(to Willow)
I’m not sure about releasing
this thing into the wild, Will.
It is a Demon.
WILLOW
I can’t kill her.

BUFFY
No, me neither.
WILLOW

I mean, she’s not me — we have a big
nothing in common, but — still.
There but for the grace of gettin’
bit. We send her to her world, she
has a chance. It’s the way it should

be anyway.
GILES
I think we’re ready.
(to Anya)
Now, no tricks, dear.
ANYA

I don’t need tricks. When I have
my powers back you will all grovel

before me.

ANGLE: BOTH WILLOWS
Roll their eyes in exactly the same way.

GILES

Willow, if you’ll complete the circle…

Willow moves to sit, then goes back to vampwill.
WILLOW

Good luck. Try not to kill people.

A beat, and Willow can’t help herself: she embraces Vampwill in an awkward hug. Vampwill smiles,
returns the hug.
Willow pulls away suddenly —

WILLOW
Hands! Hands!

— and glares at Vampwill, who grins wickedly.
Willow sits, completing the circle.
INT. THE PLANT (ALTERNATE UNIVERSE NEW FOOTAGE) – NIGHT
Vampwill pops back in. She smiles — and Oz pulls her back, impaling her just as before.

VAMPWILL
Oh, fine —

She explodes into dust.
EXT. SCHOOL – DAY
Willow and Buffy sit in front of the school on a bench.
BUFFY
You wanna go out tonight?
WILLOW

Strangely, I feel like staying home.
And doing homework. And flossing.
And dying a virgin.

BUFFY

You know, you can O.D. on virtue.

WILLOW

Between me and my evil self, I’ve got
double guilt coupons. I see now
where the path of vice leads. She
messed up everything she touched.
I don’t ever wanna be like that.
Percy comes up to Willow and Buffy, carrying a load of books and papers.

PERCY
Hey, Uh, hi.
WILLOW
Oh, hi. Listen, I didn’t
have time to —
PERCY
Okay, so I did the outline
for the paper on Roosevelt —
(hands it to her)
— but, uh, it turns out there was
two president Roosevelts and I didn’t
know exactly, uh, which I was
supposed to do, so I did both —
(hands her another)
I know they’re kind of short but
I can flesh ’em out, here’s my bibliography,

(hands it to her)
I can retype that if, uh… So just
let me know what I did wrong, and,
and, I’ll get on that.

He exits, leaving Willow completely nonplussed. A beat, and he returns. Puts an apple on top of her
books. Exits again.
The girls sit for a moment.

BUFFY
You wanna go out tonight?
WILLOW
Nine sound good?

BLACK OUT.

THE END

Transcripts

Prologue
A dark chapel. Dozens of candles on several tall iron candleholders are
standing around the chamber. An altar stands at one end. Upon it sits
the high demon D’Hoffryn. Kneeling before him on a small rug is Anya,
she who was Anyanka, once demon but now doomed to be mortal, pleading
her case.
D’Hoffryn: (resolutely) Do not ask again.
Anya: (shocked) But… But I…
D’Hoffryn: (sternly interrupts) Your powers were a gift of the lower
beings. You have proved unworthy of them.
Anya: I was robbed of them.
D’Hoffryn: By your carelessness.
Anya: (dramatically) For a thousand years I wielded the powers of The
Wish. I brought ruin to the heads of unfaithful men. I brought forth
destruction and chaos for the pleasure of the lower beings. I was feared
and worshipped across the mortal globe. (disgustedly) And now I’m stuck
at Sunnydale High. (despondently) Mortal. Child. And I’m flunking math.
D’Hoffryn: (dismissingly) This is no concern of ours. You will live out
your mortal life and die.
Anya: (pleadingly) Give me another chance. You can fold the fabric of
time. Send me back to that place and I’ll change it. I won’t fail again.
D’Hoffryn: Your time is passed.
Anya: (desperately) Do you have any idea how boring twelfth graders
are? (stands up) I’m getting my power center back. (defiantly) And if
you won’t help me, then, by the pestilent gods, I will find someone who
will!
Cut to Sunnydale High. Willow is lying on a grassy area, concentrating

hard. Soon a pencil floats up into view and starts to slowly turn end
over end. Willow smiles at her successful levitation. Beside her, Buffy
does sit-ups.
Buffy: The Watcher Council shrink is heavy into tests. He’s got tests
for everything. T.A.T.s, Rorschach, associative logic… (grunts and
sits up) He even has that test to see if you’re crazy that asks if you
ever hear voices or you ever wanted to be a florist.
Willow: (looks over at Buffy) Ooo, I used to want… (reconsiders)
Wait. Florist means crazy, right? (turns back to her pencil) I never
wanted to do that.
Buffy does some stretching exercises while she watches the pencil as
well.
Buffy: (smiles, impressed) Neat.
Willow: (grins) Thanks. It’s all about emotional control. Plus,
obviously, magic. (looks at Buffy, giddily) Hey, you wanna go to the
Espresso Pump and get sugared up on mochas?
Buffy: I’m gonna pass. Hit the pool and do some laps.
Willow: (bewildered) How come the sudden calisthenics? Aren’t you sort
of naturally buff, Buff? (smiles and giggles) Buff buff.
Buffy: Well, they’ve got us running around on the physical side, too. A
lot of reflex evaluation and precision training, you know. I-I just…
Well, I-I wanna do…
Willow: (smiles knowingly) Better than Faith?
Buffy: (embarrassed) So very shallow.
Willow: (sits up) Competition is natural and healthy. Plus, you’ll
definitely ace her on the psych tests. Just don’t mark the box that
says, ‘I sometimes like to kill people.’
Buffy: (ruefully) I know Faith’s not gonna be on the cover of Sanity
Fair, but… she had it rough. Different circumstances, that could be
me.
Willow: (shakes her head) No way. Some people just don’t have that in
them.
Buffy: (apologetically) Look, I’m sorry. I-I know how you hate talking
about Faith.
Willow: No, it’s okay.
Buffy: No, really, we should just… (glances at the pencil)
Willow: No. I-it doesn’t bother me. I mean it.
Buffy: (notices the pencil) Uh, Will?
Willow: (looks at it) Oh.
The pencil is spinning wildly. An instant later it darts off and buries
itself deeply into a tree. Willow gives Buffy a concerned look.
Buffy: Emotional control?
Willow: (abashed) I’m working on it.
Opening credits roll. Buffy’s theme plays.
~~ Part 1 ~~

Sunnydale High School. Cut to Principal Snyder’s office. He stands at
the door, hands in pockets, looking with great satisfaction at Willow
and Percy West, who are seated facing his desk.
Snyder: As far as I’m concerned, this is a marriage made in heaven.
(takes off his jacket) Willow Rosenberg, despite her unsavory
associations, (hangs it on the coat rack) represents the pinnacle of
academic achievement at Sunnydale High. (strolls up to them) Percy West
represents a devastating fast break (puts his hand on Percy’s shoulder)
and 50% from behind the three-point line. (goes around his desk to his
chair)
Willow: (confused) I-I’m not sure I understand the marriage part.
(glances at Percy)
Snyder: (indicates Willow) You’ve got the brains, (indicates Percy)
he’s got the fast break. (brings his hands together) It’s a perfect
match.
Willow: (very confused) Match? (double-takes at Percy) You want us to
breed?
Snyder: I want you to tutor him. (sits) Percy is flunking history.
Nothing seems to be able to motivate him.
Percy: (flippantly) Hey, I’m challenged.
Snyder: (raises his eyebrows) You’re lazy, self-involved and spoiled.
That’s quite the challenge. But we need a winning year, especially after
last year’s debacle with the swim team. Can’t have our point guard
benched. (to Willow) So, you’re gonna take on a little teaching job.
(encouragingly) I know how you enjoy teaching.
Willow: (makes feeble excuses) Well, I have a lot of work of my own.
Snyder: You’ve got a letter of acceptance from every university with a
stamp.
Willow: Y-yes, but I still have classes and I don’t…
Snyder: (interrupts) Rosenberg, it’s time to give something back to the
community. (stands up) I know you wanna help your school out here. Ask
me how I know.
Willow: (obediently) How do you…?
Snyder: (interrupts, glares ominously) I just… know.
Cut to the library. Willow and Buffy push the doors open and walk in.
Buffy: So he threatened you? With what?
Willow: Well, i-it wasn’t exactly anything he said. It was all in his
eyes. I mean, there was some nostril work as well, but mostly eyes.
Buffy: Snyder needs me to kick his ass.
Willow: Oh, no, Buffy, don’t get in trouble. I’ll be okay.
They reach the study table. Willow sets down her books, Buffy sits on
it.
Willow: I just hate the way he bullies people. He just assumes
everyone’s time is his.
She lifts her bag from her shoulder and sets it down also as Giles comes
out of his office sucking on a lollipop.
Giles: Willow, get on the computer. I want you to take another pass at
accessing the Mayor’s files.

Willow: (happily) Okay.
She heads behind the counter to use the computer there. Faith comes into
the library followed by an out-of-breath Wesley.
Faith: (sarcastically) Well, that was a blast.
Giles: How did it go?
Faith: (points at Wesley behind her) Princess Margaret here had a
little trouble keeping up.
Wesley makes it to the counter and leans heavily against it. Buffy
raises her eyebrows at the sight.
Giles: (to Wesley) How did it go?
Wesley: (panting heavily) Faith, uh… (pants) did quite well on the
obstacle field. (pants) Still a little sloppy, though.
Faith shoots him an incredulous look.
Giles: Do you feel up to, uh, taking Buffy out, or shall I?
Wesley: (pants) Oh, no, no, no. (pants) I’ll be fine. (pants) Just give
me a minute. (pants) And some defibrillators, if it’s (pants) not too
much trouble.
Faith: You’re gonna love it, B. It’s just like fun, only boring.
(grimaces)
Giles: (sternly) Faith, this evaluation is a necessary part of the
Council’s…
Faith: (apologetically) I know. I’m on board here. Just shooting my
mouth off.
Buffy: I better change.
She starts to walk out. As she passes by, Faith leans toward her.
Faith: Good luck.
She reaches out, lightly brushes Buffy’s shoulder with her hand and
gives her a little smile. Buffy returns the smile weakly and continues
out. Wesley takes a deep breath and follows her. Faith notices Willow at
the computer and hops up on the counter to sit and watch.
Faith: What cha doin’?
Willow: (trying to concentrate) I’m trying to access the Mayor’s
personal files.
Faith: (surprised) Can you do that?
Willow: Well, he’s got some tricky barriers set up.
Faith: (warily) Can you get past ’em?
Willow: (stubbornly) Eventually I’ll get through.
Faith watches intently as Willow continues her hacking.
Cut to a spacious new studio apartment. Mayor Wilkins considers Faith’s
report.
Mayor Wilkins: (musingly) That’s very interesting.
Faith: Yeah, I thought so, too. (looks around) Are you serious about

this place? (continues exploring)
Mayor Wilkins: Of course I am. No Slayer of mine is gonna live in a
fleabag hotel. That place has a very unsavory reputation. There are
immoral liaisons going on there.
Faith: (checks out the kitchen) Yeah, plus all the screwing. This place
is the kick!
She walks past a leather punching bag hanging in a corner and continues
into the sleeping area.
Mayor Wilkins: We’ll keep your old place, in case you need to see your
friends there, but from now on…
Faith jumps up on the bed and bounces.
Mayor Wilkins: (appalled) Oh, hey, hey, hey! Shoes! Shoes!
Faith hops off of the bed and goes up to the Mayor.
Faith: (smiling sultrily) Thanks, Sugar Daddy.
Mayor Wilkins: (admonishingly) Now, Faith, I don’t find that sort of
thing amusing. I’m a family man.
He steps aside to let Faith continue looking around.
Mayor Wilkins: (briskly) Now, let’s kill your little friend.
Faith gives him an uneasy look.
Mayor Wilkins: (reassuringly) Don’t worry. I wouldn’t ask you to do it.
Not this early in the relationship. (Faith sits, doubtfully considers)
Besides, I think a vampire attack would be less suspicious anyway. In
the meantime, let’s take a look at the rest of the apartment, huh?
(Faith stands up again) If I’m not mistaken, some lucky girl has herself
a PlayStation.
Faith: (grins broadly) No way.
Mayor Wilkins: (grins back proudly) Yes way! (chuckles happily)
Faith heads over to the TV to check it out.
Cut to the halls at Sunnydale High. Oz finds Willow as she walks along.
Oz: Hey!
Willow: Oz! Hi!
They smile at each other and move closer to hug.
Oz: There’s something about you that’s causing me to hug you.
(teasingly) It’s like I have no will of my own.
They move apart. Willow has a huge smile on her face.
Willow: Where were you yesterday?
They start walking, holding hands.
Oz: Mm… We got back late, sort of very.
Willow: (perplexed) We? Who? Where?
Oz: The band. We had a gig in Monterey Sunday night.
They stop by a classroom.

Willow: (distressed) Oh, you did? How come I didn’t know?
Oz: (surprised) I thought you did.
Willow: (hurt) Maybe I would have liked to go.
Oz: Didn’t figure you for missing school.
Willow: (disappointed) You think I’m boring.
Oz: I’d call that a radical interpretation of the text. We’re playing
tonight at the Bronze.
Willow: (apologetically) I can’t. I have too much homework.
Oz: (invitingly) If you get done early…
He steps toward the classroom. Their hands don’t part until necessary.
Cut to the quad. Percy comes up the stairs from the underpass below the
administrative offices. Willow catches up with him. He just continues
walking, completely disinterested.
Willow: Percy! Hey. Listen, I thought we could get together today at
lunch and go over your Roosevelt paper. You know, what books you’ll need
and stuff.
Percy: (purposely obtuse) What are you talking about?
Willow: Me tutoring you. Your, your history paper?
Percy: Oh, yeah, yeah. Snyder said you were gonna do it.
Willow: (surprised) He never said that.
Percy: (gives her an obnoxious look) What meeting were you at?
Willow: Look, I-I’ll get the books you need. Just meet me at lunch
and…
Percy: (interrupts) No, no, no. I don’t have any time at lunch. I gotta
hang out.
Willow: Well…
Percy: (stops and faces her, impatiently) What, what, you got something
better to do? Just type it up and put my name on it. Oh, and don’t type
too good. Dead giveaway. (leaves)
Willow can’t believe his attitude and sinks down on one of the benches
dejectedly. She takes off her pack, reaches in and pulls out a banana.
Willow: (with resolve) I’m eating this now. (daringly) It’s not
lunchtime, I don’t even care.
Before she can begin peeling it, Buffy and Xander walk up to her.
Buffy: Hey.
Xander: Willow, did you remember to tape Biography last Friday?
Willow: (absently) Uh-huh. (struggles with the banana)
Buffy: (to Xander, proudly) See, I told you. Old Reliable.
Xander nods and smiles. Willow is not amused.
Willow: (sourly) Oh, thanks.
Buffy: (taken aback) What?

Willow: ‘Old Reliable’? Yeah, great. (reprovingly) There’s a sexy
nickname.
Buffy: Well, I-I didn’t mean it as…
Willow: No, it’s fine. I’m ‘Old Reliable’.
Xander: She just means, you know, the geyser. You’re like a geyser of
fun that goes off at regular intervals.
Willow: (disgustedly) That’s Old Faithful.
Xander: Isn’t that the dog that, that the guy had to shoot…
Willow: (incensed) That’s Old Yeller.
Buffy: Xander, I beg you not to help me. Will, I-I didn’t mean it as a
bad thing. I-I think it’s good to be reliable.
Willow: (stands up, annoyed) Well, maybe I don’t wanna be reliable
all the time. Maybe I’m not just some doormat person. Homework Gal.
Xander: I’m thinking nerve strike.
Willow huffs at him and starts to go, but turns back.
Willow: Maybe I’ll change my look! Or cut class. You don’t know.
Buffy and Xander just give her surprised looks.
Willow: (holds up her banana defiantly) And I’m eating this banana.
Lunchtime be damned! (strides off)
Buffy: (goes after her) Will, wait. I’m really sorry…
Willow: (interrupts, chiding gently) Buff, I’m storming off. It doesn’t
really work if you come with me.
Buffy: (chastened) Oh.
Willow goes on her way. Buffy looks back sadly at Xander.
Cut to the halls. Willow starts trudging up the stairs. Anya notices
her.
Anya: Uh, Willow?
Willow: (turns around) Uh, hi. (doesn’t recognize)
Anya: (gestures at herself) Anya. (smiles) I’m sort of new here.
(hopefully) Um, I know Cordelia?
Willow: (smiles thinly) Oh, fun.
Anya: Yeah. Um, listen, (steps up closer to her) I have this little
project I’m working on, and I heard you were the person to ask if…
Willow: (interrupts, ironically) Yeah, that’s me. Reliable-Dog-Geyser
Person. What do you need?
Anya: Oh, it’s nothing big. (secretively) Just a little spell I’m
working on. (shrugs)
Willow: (suddenly interested, steps down to her) A spell?
(nonchalantly) Oh. I like the black arts.
Anya: I just need a secondary to create a temporal fold. I heard you
were a pretty powerful wicca, so… (shrugs again)

Willow: (smiles excitedly) You heard right, mister! I-I-I’m always
ready to work some dark mojo. (hopefully) So, tell me, is it dangerous?
Anya: (dismissively) Oh, no. (shakes her head)
Willow: (disappointed) Well, could we pretend it is?
Cut to an empty classroom after school. The camera pulls back from a
large white plate with a representation of Anya’s lost necklace painted
on it. Willow kneels facing it, arranging herbs, bones and candles. Anya
sits at a desk and prepares a mixture of sands and powders.
Anya: The necklace was a family heirloom passed down for generations.
Then it was stolen from my mom’s apartment.
Willow: How does the spell work?
Anya: (gets up) Uh, well, we both call on Eryishon, (kneels opposite
Willow) the Endless One, offer up the standard supplication, then
there’s a teensy temporal fold. (smiles weakly) We hope. Um, then I pour
the sacred sand on the representation of the necklace, and Eryishon
brings it forth from the time and place it was lost.
Willow: (smiles) Cool.
Anya: Are we ready?
Willow: (slightly nervous) I think so.
Anya takes a deep breath and holds her hand out palm up over the plate.
Anya: Eryishon. K’shala. Meh-uhn.
Willow also reaches out with her hand palm up, keeping hers tip-to-tip
with Anya’s.
Willow: Diprecht. Doh-tehenlo nu-Eryishon.
Anya picks up the bottle of sacred sand and holds it over the plate.
Anya: The child to the mother.
Willow takes hold of the bottle as well.
Willow: The river to the sea.
Anya: (closes her eyes) Eryishon, hear my prayer.
Willow closes her eyes also. There is a low rumbling, and a pillar of
energy appears over the plate and around the girls’ hands. Their hands
begin to shake, and Willow whips open her eyes, surprised by how
powerful this spell actually is.
She sees scenes from an alternate universe: Anyanka choking Giles,
licking her fingers, herself and Xander as vampires, Anyanka’s necklace,
Buffy staking Xander, herself as a vampire, herself impaled on the
broken wood of the cage, Anyanka’s necklace smashed, her vampire self
attacking Buffy and getting backhand punched, the Master watching,
herself falling to the floor, being grabbed by Larry, sitting alone in
an empty factory without the machine, Oz coming for her, the Master
grabbing Buffy.
In the classroom Anya turns over the bottle of sand, and it pours out.
Some of it sifts through Willow’s fingers before hitting the plate. More
visions follow: Angel letting the imprisoned humans out, herself
fighting one, Oz still coming for her, reaching out to grab her…
Suddenly she disappears from the scene.
Willow flashes back to the classroom, where she has a wide-eyed look of

surprise and shock on her face. The pillar of energy fades, and she
pulls back her hands, breathing hard.
Willow: That was… W-w-what was that? (slowly stands up)
Anya: (feels for her necklace in the sands) Oh, it’s not here. (pounds
the floor, frustrated) It’s not here!
Willow: (composes herself) Okay, that’s a little blacker than I like my
arts.
Anya: (exasperated) Oh, don’t be such a wimp.
Willow: (very uneasy) That, that-that wasn’t just some temporal fold,
that was some weird Hell place. I-I don’t think you’re telling me
everything.
Anya: (tersely insistent) I swear, I am just trying to find my
necklace.
Willow: (indignantly) Well, did you try looking inside the sofa in Hell?
Anya: Look, (smiles sweetly) we’ll just try it again, and…
Willow: (steps back) No! I-I think emphatically not!
Anya: (angrily) I can’t do it by myself!
Willow: (gathers her things) That’s a relief. I’m outta here.
Anya: (furiously) Fine! Go! (mutters to herself) Idiot child.
Willow overhears that, and doesn’t appreciate it.
Willow: (reaches down, haughtily) I believe these chicken feet are
mine. Look, m-magic is dangerous, Anya, i-it’s, it’s not to be toyed
with. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have someone else’s homework to do.
She leaves the room. Anya looks down at the plate, frustrated, then
picks it up.
Anya: (anguished) Nothing! (smashes it)
Cut to the factory. It’s empty except for a lot of small debris. Evil
Willow jerks up from the floor and looks around, shocked to suddenly
find that the Master, his machine, the humans, the vampires, everything
is gone.
Evil Willow: This is weird.
~~ Part 2 ~~
Cut to the street in front of the Sun Cinema. “Hotel” and “The Goose
Ran” are the featured films. The camera pans down from the sign to
several children running along the sidewalk and comes up on Evil Willow.
She’s standing in the street, disoriented and confused by everything she
sees around her. There are so many people and children boldly walking
and running around at night without a care in the world. To her it’s all
strange. Very strange. These people should be cowering in their homes,
not out enjoying themselves. As she walks along the yellow centerline,
some people walk by her, crossing the street from the theater to the
Espresso Pump, coming within reaching distance, blissfully unaware of
who she is. No one fears her. No one even notices her. Behind her she
hears a girl screaming and turns to look, but the girl is just resisting
some teasing from her boyfriend, not shaking in fear of a vampire. An
old woman approaches her, not even put off by her full leather attire.
Old woman: E-e-excuse me, young lady…

Evil Willow faces her and snarls. The lady is frightened, and she backs
away shaken, but she’s not terrified as Evil Willow would have expected,
probably assuming she was just another punk. She rolls her eyes and
continues.
Cut to the Bronze. k’s Choice is on stage performing “Virgin State of
Mind”, a slow bluesy number, while several couples slow dance to it.
Lyrics: There’s a chair in my head on which I used to sit / Took a
pencil and I wrote the following on it / Now there’s a key where my
wonderful mouth / Used to be
Evil Willow enters and looks around. The place is calm, especially
compared to what she’s used to. People are hanging out, chatting,
drinking, playing pool. Only a few eyes notice her in her black leather.
Lyrics: Dig it up, throw it at me / Dig it up, throw it at me
Evil Willow stops by a pool table and looks forlornly all around, taking
in the situation.
Lyrics: Where can I run to / Where can I hide / Who will I turn to /
Now I’m in the virgin state of mind
A guy in a leather jacket can’t help but notice Evil Willow as she walks
around him, staring appraisingly at him with her evil scowl. She just
keeps going. He doesn’t want anything to do with her.
Lyrics: Got a knife to disengage the voids that I can’t bear / Cut out
words I’ve got written on my chair / Like, do you think I’m sexy / And
do you think I really care
Evil Willow begins to get depressed about how things suddenly are. She
doesn’t watch where she’s going, and neither does Percy, who bumps into
her.
Percy: Hey! (recognizes her, surprised, then amused) Rosenberg? What
are you doing, trick-or-treating? (points at her) You’re supposed to be
at home doing my history report. I flunk that class, you’re in big
trouble with Snyder. (smugly) Till we graduate, I own your ass.
She raises her eyes and looks at him with weary amusement.
Evil Willow: Bored now.
She shoves the heel of her hand squarely into his chest, sending him
flying onto a pool table. He lands hard on his back, and his momentum
forces him into a back roll off of it. Several guys around them are
shocked.
Guy#1: Whoa, whoa, whoa, man!
Guy#2: Hey!
Guy#1: What’s up with that, man?
Guy#3: What the heck?
Evil Willow now has the attention of the crowd as she slowly goes over
to Percy.
Evil Willow: (pensively) I’m having a terrible night.
She reaches down and lifts Percy up from the floor by his throat,
digging her fingertips into his flesh and choking him.
Evil Willow: (expectantly) Wanna make it better?
Percy tries to punch her, but she idly blocks him and looks up into his
eyes, sadly at first but then with a wide grin when Percy can’t pull her

hand off. He clutches her neck with his other hand and tries to choke
her. Some guys in the background make fun of Percy, unaware of the
seriousness of his situation.
Guy#4: Check it out!
Xander comes up behind him, eager to get in on the fun.
Xander: What’s going on? Is there a funny thing?
The guys laughingly point over at Evil Willow and Percy, who have both
hands around each other’s necks now. Percy is choking, while Evil Willow
just continues to smile. Xander runs up behind Percy and yanks him off
of her, throwing him to the floor.
Xander: Back off! You stay the hell away from her!
Percy: (panicked) Okay! Sure! (scrambles away)
Xander turns back to make sure Willow is okay, but is stunned by the way
she’s dressed. For her part, Evil Willow’s face brightens, glad to
finally see a familiar face.
Evil Willow: (thrilled) Xander!
Xander: (amazed) Will, changing the look not an idle threat with you.
Evil Willow: (smiles widely) You’re alive!
She hugs him, running her hands sensuously over his neck and back.
Xander: Uh… Will, this is verging on naughty touching here. (her
hands go further down) Don’t wanna fall back on bad habits. (her hands
reach his butt) (jumps, surprised) Hands! Hands in new places!
Evil Willow: (realizes, confused, revolted) You’re alive.
Xander: (nods, eyeing her curiously) You mentioned that before. Will,
are you okay?
Evil Willow: (distraught) No! Everything’s different.
Buffy: (finds them) Oh. There you are.
Xander: (never looking away from Evil Willow) Hey, Buff.
Buffy: Aren’t you gonna introduce me to your… (recognizes) Holy
God, you’re Willow.
Evil Willow: (recognizes the Slayer, vehemently) You.
Buffy: (tries to be polite) You know what? (smiles supportively) I, I
like the look. (stammers) It’s, um… it’s, it’s extreme, but it, it, it
looks good, you know, it’s a (breathes deeply) leather thing, and, uh…
(to Xander) I said extreme already, right?
Evil Willow: (steps up to Buffy, eyes narrowed with hatred) I don’t
like you.
Buffy: (taken aback) Will, I’m sorry about today. You know how my foot
likes to live in my mouth. (puzzled) But you know… y-you really didn’t
have to prove anything.
Evil Willow glares at both of them with disgust. She has nothing to say
to these humans.
Evil Willow: Leaving now. (starts away)
Xander: Will, gotta say, not lovin’ the new you.

Buffy: (goes after her) Will, wait…
She grasps Evil Willow’s arm from behind and turns her around, and is
dumbfounded when she sees her in her vampire guise.
Evil Willow: (roars) Get off me!
She shakes the Slayer off and stalks away, leaving Buffy and Xander
standing there in complete shock and dawning horror.
Cut to an alley. Evil Willow strides along it at a brisk pace. Behind
her two vampires come into view.
Alfonse: Willow Rosenberg.
Evil Willow: (stops and smiles to herself in anticipation) I’m not
supposed to talk to strangers.
Alfonse: Then we won’t talk.
He nudges his partner to attack. Evil Willow does a side kick at him,
sending him stumbling back. Alfonse lunges at her, but she grabs onto
his shoulder and uses his momentum to flip him to the ground. She turns
around and does a half-spinning hook kick to the other one’s head. He
backs up a step, but keeps his balance and leans back in to punch Evil
Willow. She middle blocks two shots and follows up with a punch to his
head. She grabs his shoulder while he’s dazed and flips him over onto
his back. Alfonse comes at her again, and she connects with a roundhouse
kick to his side. He falls, but gets up quickly and grabs her shoulder.
She grabs onto his hand to keep it in place, and with her other hand she
pushes down on his shoulder, forcing him to flip forward onto his back.
She takes his hand and jerks it back hard, snapping his wrist. He grunts
in pain and gives in.
Evil Willow: (reprovingly) You made me cranky.
She brushes her fingers against his.
Alfonse: (panting) There’s been a mistake here. We were sent after a
human.
Evil Willow: (intrigued) Really? Who do you work for?
Alfonse: (hoarsely) I’m not telling you a thing.
With a half-smile, she takes one of his fingers and bends it back
sharply, breaking it. He screams in pain.
Evil Willow: (still smiling) Who do you work for?
Alfonse: (gives in) Wilkins. The Mayor.
She takes another finger and breaks it, too. Again he cries out in pain.
Evil Willow: Who do you work for? (bats her eyes suggestively)
Alfonse: (gets it) You.
She drops his arm and lets him up. The other vampire gets up also,
rubbing his head.
Evil Willow: (commands) Get your friends. Bring them here. The world’s
no fun anymore. (smiles evilly) We’re gonna make it the way it was.
Starting with the Bronze.
Alfonse nods obediently at his new boss.
Cut to the library. Buffy and Xander come in, both silent, very detached
from reality. Giles hears them come in and walks out from his office.

Giles: Oh, Buffy. I thought you were going out tonight. I didn’t
expect…
He sees the oppressive grief in their expressions.
Giles: (very worried) What is it?
Cut to later, after they’ve explained. They all sit on the stairs to the
stacks, detached and staring off into space. Giles dangles his glasses
from his hands. Xander idly handles a cross.
Xander: (takes a breath) This isn’t real.
Buffy: (numbly) I can’t feel anything. Arms, legs, anything.
Giles: She was truly the finest of all of us.
Xander: Way better than me.
Giles: (nods decisively) Much, much better.
Xander: It’s all my fault.
Buffy: (despairingly) No, it’s me. I-it’s me. I’m the one that called
her reliable. She must have gone out and gotten attacked, which she
never would have done if I hadn’t have called her reliable. And now my
best friend is…
Willow walks in and finds them there.
Willow: (curiously) What’s going on?
They all look up surprised. Xander lifts his cross in defense. Willow
notices their sad faces and is amazed at their expressions.
Willow: Jeez, who died?
She notices just how deeply sad they really are and realizes she may
have gotten it right.
Willow: (almost panicked) Oh, God! Who died?
Xander jumps up and gets in Willow’s face with the cross.
Xander: Back! Get back, demon!
She doesn’t cower from it, but instead shows deep concern for him,
thinking maybe he’s flipped out or something. Xander shakes the cross as
though it were broken and puts it back in her face. Buffy and Giles
notice that she’s not frightened of the cross, and slowly approach.
Buffy: (breathlessly) Willow, you’re alive?
Willow: (puzzled) Aren’t I usually?
Without any further hesitation, Buffy runs the two steps to her best
friend and hugs her hard and close.
Buffy: Oh!
Willow is surprised, and lets out a little groan from the tightness of
the embrace. An instant later Xander is also hugging her for all he’s
worth.
Willow: (wonderingly) I love you guys, too?
The hug goes on for a long moment before it gets too intense for Willow.
Willow: Okay. Oxygen becoming an issue.

They both let go, smiling at her with tears in their eyes. She smiles
back, but still doesn’t know what to make of it all.
Willow: Giles, what’s going on with these…
Before she can finish she finds herself being warmly embraced again by
the normally reserved Watcher.
Willow: Oh!
Again she groans from the tightness of the hug, and Giles quickly
releases her, a bit embarrassed at his emotional display.
Giles: Oh. Sorry. (backs away)
Willow: (still wondering) It’s really nice that you guys missed me.
(wide-eyed) Say, you all didn’t happen to do a bunch of drugs, did ya?
Xander: (breathless) Will, we saw you at the Bronze. A vampire.
Willow: (startled, then insulted) I’m not a vampire.
Buffy: You are. (gets a look from Willow) I-I mean, you, you were.
(very confused) Giles, planning on jumping in with an explanation any
time soon?
Giles: (very unsure) Well, uh… something… something, um, very
strange is happening.
Xander: (facetiously) Can you believe the Watcher’s Council let this
guy go?
Cut to the Bronze. Anya walks up to the bar and sits.
Anya: (wearily) What a day. (to the bartender) Gimme a beer.
Bartender: (deadpan) I.D.
She gives him an incredulous look.
Bartender: I.D.
Anya: (loses it, thumps her fists on the bar) I’m eleven hundred and
twenty years old! Just gimme a friggin’ beer!
Bartender: (unimpressed) I.D.
Anya: (sighs, defeated) Gimme a Coke.
Cut to the stage. Oz and Devon set up their equipment.
Devon: Man, we need a roadie. (wistfully) Other bands have roadies.
Oz: Well, other bands know more than three chords. Your professional
bands can play up to six, sometimes seven completely different chords.
Devon: That’s just, like, fruity jazz bands.
He looks worriedly at Oz, seeking confirmation for this theory.
Angel: (finds them) Oz.
Oz: Hey, man. You looking for Buffy?
Angel: As always.
Oz: Well, no sightings as of yet, but I think she said she’d show.
The door to the club opens, and in walk several vampires. They fan out
into the crowd. The people back away in fright. Alfonse comes in last,

grabs an unlucky boy and throws him into a table.
Oz: (quietly to Angel) That doesn’t look good.
Alfonse: (yells) EVERYBODY, SHUT UP!
From over at the bar, Anya notices the vampires and begins to take an
interest.
Alfonse: (to everyone) Alright. Nobody cause any trouble or try to
leave… and nobody gets hurt.
Angel: (quietly) Why don’t I believe him?
Oz: (quietly) Well, he lacks credibility.
They notice one of the vampires prevent a guy from leaving through the
back door.
Oz: Can you get outta here?
Angel: (eyes cast upward) Skylight in the roof. I can make it.
Oz: (worried) I think we need some backup.
Angel: (evenly) I think I’m needed here.
Oz: (raises his eyebrows) Ten to one. Could get pointless.
The door opens again and another vampire enters, followed closely by
Evil Willow. She looks around at everyone, very pleased. Anya
straightens up now, quite intrigued. Evil Willow smiles when she reaches
the middle of the empty dance floor.
Evil Willow: Look. Everyone’s all afraid. (sighs blissfully) It’s just
like old times.
Oz: (in utter disbelief) Get Buffy. Do it now.
Angel wastes no time, wheels around, and begins climbing the stage ropes
to the roof. Devon gets in close behind Oz.
Devon: (quietly, smiling) Dude, check out your girlfriend.
Evil Willow saunters leisurely over to a girl alone at a table.
Evil Willow: (sweetly) What’s your name?
Sandy: Sandy.
Evil Willow lightly brushes her hands along Sandy’s arm and takes her
hand. She slowly pulls her onto the dance floor where everyone can see
them.
Evil Willow: You don’t have to be afraid… (smiles disarmingly) just
to please me. (to everyone) If you’re all good boys and girls, we’ll
make you young and strong forever and ever.
She turns Sandy around to face the stage and stands behind her,
continuing to fondle Sandy’s shoulders and head.
Evil Willow: (enticingly) We’ll have fun.
Sandy flinches when Evil Willow grasps her hair and pulls it to the
side, forcing Sandy to tilt her head, leaving her neck bare. Evil Willow
lasciviously licks the girl’s neck.
Evil Willow: If you’re not…
She looks around warningly, vamps out, smiles, licks her lips and roars

as she bites Sandy savagely on the neck and drains her dry. Oz tries to
run from the stage to Sandy’s aid, but is stopped by one of the
vampires.
Devon: (to Oz) No, man!
When Evil Willow is finished feeding, she lets Sandy’s lifeless body
collapse to the floor and morphs back to her human guise.
Evil Willow: (idly curious) Questions? Comments?
Oz: (shocked) Willow. You don’t wanna do this.
Evil Willow: (approaches blithely) I don’t? (smiles proudly) But I’m so
good at it.
The vampire holding Oz lets him go down to meet her.
Oz: (horrified) Who did this to you?
Evil Willow: (recognizes him) I know you. (disgustedly) You’re a White
Hat. (eyes narrow, puzzled) How come you’re talking to me like we’re
friends?
Anya slowly comes up to her from behind.
Anya: (unafraid) ‘Cause he thinks you’re someone else. He thinks you’re
the Willow that belongs in this reality.
Evil Willow: (confused) Another me?
Anya: You know this isn’t your world, right? I mean, you know you don’t
belong here.
Evil Willow: (softly) No. This is a dumb world. (smiles wistfully) In
my world there are people in chains, and we can ride them like ponies.
Anya: (states the obvious) You wanna get back there.
Evil Willow: (nods mournfully) Yeah.
Anya: So do I.
Cut to the school. Cut to the library. Giles sits deep in thought.
Willow leans in Giles’ office doorway while Buffy and Xander sit on the
study table.
Willow: This is creepy. I don’t like the thought that there’s a vampire
out there that looks like me.
Xander: Not looks like. Is.
Buffy: It was exactly you, Will, every detail. Except for your not
being a dominatrix. (uneasily) As far as we know.
Willow: (rolls her eyes, grins sardonically) Oh, right. Me and Oz play
‘Mistress of Pain’ every night.
Giles furrows his brow. Buffy and Xander’s eyes glaze over.
Xander: Did anyone else just go to a scary visual place?
Buffy: Oh, yeah.
They all look up when Angel makes a quick and noisy entrance, breathing
hard from running.
Angel: (very upset) Buffy, I… I just… Something’s happened that…
He pauses when he gets patient, waiting looks from Buffy and Xander.

Angel: (blurts it out) Willow’s dead.
Buffy and Xander nod knowingly. Willow straightens up from leaning
against the door frame. Angel notices her.
Angel: (distractedly) Hey, Willow.
He looks back at Buffy and Xander. Xander raises his eyebrows at him.
Suddenly it clicks in Angel’s mind, and he does a double take at Willow.
Angel: (very confused) Wait a second.
He looks back at Buffy and Xander for confirmation. Giles raises his
eyebrows, rolls his eyes and grimaces.
Xander: (understandingly) We’re right there with you, buddy.
Buffy: We saw her, too, at the Bronze.
Willow smiles reassuringly at him and blithely waves.
Angel: (still somewhat unsure) Okay. She’s there now with a cadre of
vampires looking to party.
They all immediately get up and head out.
Buffy: (resignedly) We can figure out who she is after we stop the
feeding frenzy.
Cut to the hall.
Buffy: How many of them were there?
Angel: Eight or ten.
Buffy: (to Giles) Should we call Faith?
Giles: No, I don’t want her in combat yet. Not around civilians.
Xander: (heartily) Hear, hear.
Willow: (holds back) Guys? (they stop and look back) What are we gonna
do with me? The… other… me?
The three men look at each other uncomfortably, shuffling their feet and
hanging back. Buffy realizes she has to take the lead.
Buffy: (comes closer to Willow) I don’t know, Will. (hesitates) I mean,
we just have to stop them.
Willow: I-I get that. I just kind of wanted to know… (thinks of
something) Oh! Hey, uh, go. I-I’ll catch up.
She heads back into the library as the others go. Cut inside the
library. Willow goes to the checkout counter and leans over, but can’t
reach what she’s looking for. She starts to go around it, but an arm
reaches around from behind and grabs her. A hand clamps over her mouth
to prevent her from screaming.
Evil Willow: (gloating) Alone at last.
~~ Part 3 ~~
The library. Evil Willow turns Willow around and looks her up and down,
particularly noticing her pink sweater.
Evil Willow: (appraisingly) Well, look at me. (doubtfully) I’m all
fuzzy.

Willow: What do I want with you? (catches herself) Uh…
Evil Willow: (grimly) Your little school friend Anya said that you’re
the one that brought me here. She said that you could get me back to my
world.
Willow: Oh. (gets it) Oh! Oops!
Evil Willow: But I don’t know… (smiles wickedly) I kinda like the
idea of the two of us.
She turns Willow around again, caressing her shoulders.
Evil Willow: We could be quite a team, (meaningfully) if you came
around to my way of thinking.
Willow: (uncertainly) Would that mean we have to snuggle?
Evil Willow brushes Willow’s hair away from her neck.
Evil Willow: (coaxing) What do you say?
She gives Willow’s neck an eager, lengthy lick. Willow shudders with
loathing and grimaces at the feeling.
Evil Willow: (enticingly) Wanna be bad?
Willow: (completely unnerved) This just can’t get more disturbing.
Evil Willow growls horribly with desire and bares her teeth behind
Willow’s neck. Willow freaks out and whirls around, stepping back and
away from her.
Willow: (flapping her hands with disgust) Ack! Ew! No more! You’re
really starting to freak me out!
She tries to go around Evil Willow, but gets blocked. She snatches up
Xander’s cross from the counter and nervously waves it in Evil Willow’s
face, who roars and bats her arm away, sending the cross flying. She
grabs Willow and throws her hard up and over the counter. Willow lands
with a crash, hitting her head hard against the metal filing cabinet.
Willow: Ow!
Evil Willow: (stalks grimly around the counter) You don’t wanna play, I
guess I can’t force you.
Willow reaches under the counter for what she originally came for and
pulls out the dart rifle just as Evil Willow comes through the door to
behind the counter.
Evil Willow: Oh, wait.
Willow locks the bolt in place.
Evil Willow: (smiling meanly) I can.
Willow frantically aims and fires. The dart hits Evil Willow dead center
of her chest. Stunned, she looks down at the protruding dart, staggers
and starts to fall.
Evil Willow: (moans) Bitch…
She hits the floor. Willow stares in fearful amazement at her other
fallen self.
Cut to later. Angel and Xander drag Evil Willow by the arms into the
book cage.
Giles: (dumbfounded) It’s extraordinary.

Willow: (appalled) It’s horrible! That’s me as a vampire? (Angel closes
the door) I’m so evil and… skanky. (aside to Buffy, worried) And I
think I’m kinda gay.
Buffy: (reassuringly) Willow, just remember, a vampire’s personality
has nothing to do with the person it was.
Angel: (without thinking) Well, actually… (gets a look from Buffy)
That’s a good point.
Xander: So, uh, what do we do now?
Giles: We still have to get to the Bronze.
Angel: Well, even if they’re supposed to wait for her they may start
feeding. Vampires are not notoriously reliable.
Xander: (hopefully) So we charge in, much in the style of John Wayne?
Giles: High casualty risk. I haven’t any other plan, though.
Buffy: (raises her hand) Uh, I have a really bad idea.
Cut to the Bronze. The camera pans from the sign down to the group.
Angel drops down from the roof onto a crate, then down to the pavement.
Angel: They’re still in a holding pattern. That’s good. It means they
must really be afraid of you.
Willow walks up to them wearing Evil Willow’s leather ensemble.
Willow: Who wouldn’t be?
She shifts around uncomfortably, trying to get the feel of the tight
outfit.
Buffy: Are you okay in that?
Willow: It’s a little binding. I guess vampires really don’t have to
breathe. (notices her cleavage) Gosh, look at those.
Xander stares with wide eyes.
Giles: (stammers) Um, ahem, Willow, you, uh, you go in and defuse the
situation as best you can. At least try and get some of them to come out
and even up the odds a bit.
Buffy: First sign of trouble, you give us a signal. We come in hard and
fast.
Xander: What is the signal?
Willow: (worried) Me screaming.
Angel: Giles, you and Xander wait by the back entrance.
Giles: Good.
They go. Buffy shows concern for her friend.
Buffy: Now, you’re sure you’re up to this?
Willow: Don’t worry. I won’t do anything that could be interpreted as
brave. (smiles)
Buffy: We’ll be right outside.
Willow nods wanly and heads for the door, still twisting uncomfortably
in the leather. She takes a deep breath and knocks with firm resolve.

Cut inside. A vampire opens the door. Willow smiles and waves at him in
greeting.
Willow: Hi. I’m back.
She slowly comes in. Alfonse and Anya meet her inside. Willow does her
best not to show her fear.
Alfonse: Did you find the girl?
Willow: (tries to sound authoritative) Yep. I did.
Anya: (mystified) Where is she?
Willow: (bravely) I killed her.
Anya gives her a look of stunned disbelief.
Willow: And sucked her blood, (nods triumphantly) as we vampires do.
The silence is thick with tension, making her nervous. She turns to the
doorman.
Willow: (quietly aside to him) You know, I think maybe I heard
something out there. Why don’t you go check?
He opens the door and goes out, closing the door behind him. Outside
Angel grabs him by the shoulders and holds him steady as Buffy plunges a
stake into his chest. Back inside, Anya confronts Willow.
Anya: (incredulous) H-how could you kill her? She was our best shot at
getting your world back.
Willow: (walks past her, straightens challengingly) I don’t like that
you dare question me.
Oz notices that something’s up.
Willow: (now enjoying herself) Maybe I’ll have my minions take you out
back and kill you horribly.
She sneaks Oz a little smile and wave. He barely reacts, just raising an
eyebrow a bit. Anya follows her onto the dance floor.
Anya: (muttering) Vampires. Always thinking with your teeth.
Willow: (haughtily) She bothered me. She’s so weak and accommodating.
She’s always letting people walk all over her, (turns to face her) and
then she gets cranky with her friends for no reason. I just couldn’t
let her live.
She steps over to another vampire, indicating the door.
Willow: (chummily) You know, he’s been gone for a while. Why don’t you
go check on him? (pats his shoulder approvingly)
He heads for the door and goes out.
Alfonse: (impatiently) Well, Boss, since that plan is out, why don’t we
get with the killing?
Willow suddenly worries that her plan may have backfired.
Cut to the library. Evil Willow regains consciousness in the book cage,
now dressed in Willow’s pink sweater and flowery skirt. She sits up and
notices her change of clothes.
Evil Willow: (recoiling) Oh, this is like a nightmare.

The door opens, and Cordelia comes into the library. She’s dressed in a
shimmery evening dress, carrying a couple of books.
Cordelia: Hello? Giles?
Evil Willow notices her and remembers her recent kill in the alternate
universe.
Cordelia: (casually) Wesley? I just happened to stop by… for books.
Evil Willow: (stands up, speaks imperiously) Hey, you.
Cordelia: (faces her) ‘Hey me’? (insulted) ‘Hey me’ what? I have a
name, you know.
Evil Willow: (thinks) Uh, Cordelia.
Cordelia: (steps over) What did you do? Lock yourself in the book cage?
Evil Willow: (cunningly goes along with it) Yeah. Lemme out… ‘Cause
I’m so helpless.
Cordelia: Okay.
She heads behind the counter. Evil Willow smirks at her success.
Cordelia: I think Giles keeps a spare. How’d you manage to lock
yourself in, anyway?
Evil Willow: Uh, I was looking at books. I like… books…
Cordelia finds the keys and goes back to the cage.
Evil Willow: …’cause I’m shy.
Cordelia: (sarcastically) Yeah, right. The famous shy girl act all the
boys fall for.
Evil Willow: (anxiously) Open the cage. (tenses up)
Cordelia puts in the key and turns it, but stops short of unlocking it.
She looks up at Evil Willow and has a thought.
Cordelia: Wait. (briskly) It occurs to me that we’ve never really had
the opportunity to talk. You know, woman to woman… with you locked up.
Evil Willow: (impatient) Don’t wanna talk. Hungry.
Cordelia: (pretends to think) What could we talk about? Oh! Hey! How
about the ethics of boyfriend stealing?
Evil Willow can’t believe it.
Cut to the Bronze.
Willow: I don’t know if I feel like killing anymore.
Anya and Alfonse can’t believe their ears. Willow walks past a girl at a
table.
Willow: I’m so bored.
She idly rakes her fingers through the girl’s long hair, but they get
tangled. Rather than pull them through harder to keep in character, she
gently lays the girl’s hair back. Anya begins to get suspicious. Willow
strolls over to the stage, putting Oz to her back.
Willow: I-it would be like shooting fish in a barrel. Where’s the fun?
Alfonse: (smiles grimly) With all due respect, Boss, the fun would be

the eating.
Willow: (brilliantly) Maybe we should let everyone go, and give them a
thirty second head start.
Anya: (finally figures it out) Wait a minute.
Willow: (frowns fretfully) No! I like my plan.
Anya: (snickers) Oh, nice try.
Willow: (desperately) Okay, let’s get to the killing. (hurriedly to
Alfonse) Why don’t we start with her?
Anya: Why don’t we start with you? (to Alfonse, in disgust) If she’s a
vampire, then I’m the creature from the black lagoon.
Cut to the library. Evil Willow hangs onto the cage mesh, extremely
bored. Cordelia has made herself comfortable, seated in a chair facing
the cage and holding a mug of coffee.
Cordelia: (rationalizing) And, okay, it isn’t even like I was that
attracted to Xander. It was more just that we kept being put in these
life or death situations, and that’s always all sexy and stuff.
Evil Willow just stares blankly out of the cage.
Cordelia: (gets up) I mean, I more or less knew he was a loser. (sets
down the mug) (huffily) But that doesn’t make it okay for you to come
around and… (notices Evil Willow’s stare) What? Do I have something on
my neck?
Evil Willow: (wearily) Not yet.
Cordelia: (worried) Am I getting a zit? (checks her skin)
Evil Willow: (very bored and tired) Cordelia, I’m very sorry. I
realize I was wrong. I’ll never steal your boyfriend again.
Cordelia: (stung) Like you could! I should just leave you in there, but
I’m a great humanitarian, (gets the keys) and you will just have to
think of a way to pay me back sometime.
She unlocks the cage, turns the handle and pulls the door open. Evil
Willow steps out.
Evil Willow: Okay. (vamps out) How about dinner?
~~ Part 4 ~~
The hall outside the library. The doors burst open, and Cordelia shoots
out screaming wildly and runs down the hall. Cut to a dark empty
classroom. Cordelia runs in and backs up along two rows of desks,
pulling them together as she goes to block Evil Willow’s way.
Cordelia: (desperately) I didn’t mean all that stuff I said before. I
want you to have Xander. My blessings on you both!
Evil Willow just pushes the desks back apart, making a game of it.
Evil Willow: I’m so over him. I need fresh blood.
Cordelia runs away screaming through the classroom’s back door.
Cut to the hall in front of the library. Wesley is walking toward the
doors, when another scream from Cordelia catches him by surprise. He
reacts defensively, dropping his briefcase and spinning round, but
quickly recovers himself and starts running in the direction of the
scream, abandoning his briefcase, reaching under his jacket for a cross.

Cut to the girls’ bathroom. Cordelia runs in and realizes she’s made a
mistake, trapping herself. Evil Willow strolls in behind her.
Evil Willow: No more hiding.
Cordelia backs away as she advances. Suddenly Wesley jumps out and
brandishes his cross in her face.
Wesley: (commandingly) Back! Creature of the night!
Evil Willow growls angrily.
Wesley: (warningly) Leave this place!
Evil Willow: Don’t wanna.
Wesley quickly but nervously reaches into his jacket and pulls out a
vial of holy water. Evil Willow sighs. He holds it up, threatening to
throw it on her.
Evil Willow: (sighs heavily) Whatever.
She turns and leaves. Wesley slowly relaxes, heaving a sigh of relief
and lowering the cross and the vial. Cordelia walks up behind him and
lightly touches him on the shoulder. He freaks out, screams and spins
around, thrusting the cross and holy water right into Cordelia’s face.
He lowers them when he recognizes her, and tries to catch his breath.
Cordelia: (whines apologetically) I’m sorry.
Wesley: (puts the water away) No, no. (breathes deeply) A little on
edge. (bravely) You know, men in combat. (makes a tough face) Grr.
(concerned) Are you all right?
Cordelia: (awed) You saved my life. Thank you!
She flings herself worshipfully at him and throws her arms around him,
hugging him tightly.
Wesley: (awkwardly) Oh, yes. Uh… Yes.
He is somewhat startled, but enjoys the hug while it lasts. Then they
both peer out the door.
Wesley: (stunned) Was that…?
Cordelia: Willow. (shakes her head sorrowfully) They got Willow. (gets
over it) (brightly) So, are you doing anything tonight?
Wesley is rendered speechless.
Cut to the Bronze.
Anya: (dispirited) I’m just so tired of being around human beings and
all their baggage. I-I don’t care if I ever get my powers back.
Oz gets behind Willow, backing her up. Willow gulps.
Anya: (crosses her arms) I think he (meaning Alfonse) should eat you.
Willow: (improvises quickly) This girl has a history of mental problems
dating back to early childhood. (desperately) I’m a blood-sucking fiend!
(pats herself) Look at my outfit!
Alfonse: (shakes his head in shame) A human. I should have smelled it
right away.
Willow: A human? Oh, yeah? Could a human do this?
She screams at the top of her lungs.

Anya and Alfonse aren’t impressed, and respond simultaneously.
Anya: Sure. Yeah. Humans do that. Yeah. (shrugs)
Alfonse: (concurring) Yeah. Yeah, I think, yeah.
Willow is about ready to panic. Suddenly the door to the club is thrown
open, and Buffy and Angel make their entrance. Buffy log rolls over the
edge of a pool table, grabbing a cue stick along the way, as Alfonse
runs over to engage her. Buffy uses the cue to block a high punch from
Alfonse and then hits him in the chest with it. Then she spins halfway
around to face another vampire and jabs him in the gut with the cue. As
he doubles over in pain, Buffy whirls around and slams the end of the
cue into the back of his head.
Anya looks around at the chaos, and decides it’s time to make a break
for it. She meets Willow on her way, though, who doesn’t fancy Anya
getting off scott free. Anya smiles guilelessly at her, but doesn’t get
away with it. Willow grunts as she punches Anya hard, sending her to the
floor unconscious. Unfortunately, the punch really hurts her hand.
Willow: Ow! Ow! Ow! Happy, but ow!
Oz snatches her away from the fray and up onto the stage. Devon tries to
copy Angel’s earlier move and climb up the stage ropes, but just doesn’t
have the strength to do it.
The customers flee through the now-open front door while Angel ducks a
half spinning jumping in-to-out crescent kick, shoves the vampire that
tried it into a post and kidney-punches him. Out of the corner of his
eye he spots another vampire coming at him and delivers a side kick to
his stomach. He then grabs the one slumped by the post and hurls him
through the air into a magazine rack. Angel turns back to the other
vampire, spins twice and delivers a nasty backhand punch to his face,
making him fall face down onto the pool table. Angel grabs onto his
jacket, yanks him back up and punches him in the face, knocking him
down. Meanwhile the first vampire is back up behind Angel and punches
him in the face as he turns to face him.
On the stage Oz yells back at Devon, who’s gotten caught in the ropes.
Oz: Devon, come on!
Oz leads Willow away backstage, but they are blocked by Evil Willow,
just arriving in her vampire guise. She grabs Oz by his shirt and
smashes him into Devon, and the two boys crash to the floor.
Willow: (frightened) No more snuggles?
Evil Willow backhand punches her hard, causing her to fall back against
the drum set. It makes plenty of noise as she and the cymbals crash
loudly to the floor.
In the back room, Giles and Xander wrench the door open just as the
guard vampire throws back a fleeing patron. Xander grabs him from behind
and tries to stake him, but gets thrown off and into a wall. Giles
double-fists him in the face, but gets thrown back into another wall.
Xander regains his footing and punches the vampire hard in the face,
making his neck snap back, dazing him. He grabs the vampire by the
jacket and flips him over onto his back at the base of some stairs.
Giles rushes in, falls to his knees and stakes him.
On the stage Evil Willow steps over to Willow and grabs her around the
neck, choking her.
Over by the pool tables Buffy swings her cue around, aiming for
Alfonse’s head, but he grabs the cue and wrests it from her grip. Even
so, the shock of the blow sends him falling to the floor. Another
vampire launches a punch at Buffy and hits her squarely in the side of

the head. She takes it in stride and delivers both a backhand punch and
a punch to his jaw. He stumbles against a post, where Buffy roundhouse
kicks him twice in the face. He tries to punch her, but she grabs onto
his arm, sidesteps him and throws him into a rack of cues.
On the stage a struggling Willow is doing her best to hold her alter ego
at bay, but isn’t having much success.
A vampire does an axe kick at Angel, but he rolls out of the way just in
time so the vampire’s leg lands on the pool table instead of Angel’s
head. Angel smashes his arm down on the vampire’s knee, audibly breaking
it, and then does a backhand punch to his face. The vampire falls
backward to the floor. Angel reaches onto the pool table and picks up
some balls, which he throws at an incoming vampire. They just bounce off
of him, and he tries to punch Angel, who blocks it with both hands and
backhands the vampire in the face, making him stagger back into the
pole. The vampire roars and immediately comes back, grabs Angel and
carries him out of the shot.
Alfonse swings the cue stick at Buffy, but she grabs hold of it and
swings it downward and around, wresting it from his grip. She then
follows up with a full spinning wheel kick to his face, sending him to
the floor. She hears Willow cry out from the stage and glimpses her
predicament. Alfonse gets back to his feet, and Buffy uppercuts him with
the cue. He goes flying into the pastry bar.
On stage Evil Willow tightens her grip on Willow’s neck.
Behind Buffy Alfonse gets back up, but Buffy jams the business end of
the cue stick into his chest without even looking back, dusting him.
Things are looking dire for Willow on stage. Buffy runs to her aid,
smashing the cue into the back of a vampire’s head along the way and
breaking it, resulting in a sharp makeshift stake. She leaps up onto the
stage and is about to stab down hard with it into Evil Willow’s back
with it, when Willow shouts out to stop her.
Willow: (urgently) BUFFY, NO!
Buffy reacts instantly, holding back just short of penetration, and
instead grabs Evil Willow and yanks her roughly away from Willow,
restraining her securely. Angel is finished with his fight also and hops
up onto the stage as well. Evil Willow realizes that she is now
outnumbered. Willow stands up and gingerly massages her neck.
Willow: (admiringly) Nice reflexes.
Buffy: (shrugs gracefully) Well, I work out.
Evil Willow: (to Willow, sadly) This world’s no fun.
Willow: (surprised, empathetically) You noticed that, too?
Cut to the factory where Evil Willow first appeared in this reality.
Giles, Anya and Oz finish setting up for the spell to send Evil Willow
back. Giles lights the candles. Xander steps over to Evil Willow, but
cautiously, not getting too close. Angel keeps a wary eye on her from
behind.
Xander: So, um, in your reality, I’m like this bad-ass vampire, huh?
People afraid of me?
Evil Willow just looks askance at him, then rolls her eyes and turns
away.
Xander: (steps away, chortling gleefully) Oh, yeah. I’m bad.
Oz stands up and walks behind Willow and Buffy, who are observing Evil
Willow.

Buffy: (uncertainly) I’m not sure about releasing this thing into the
wild, Will. It is a demon.
Evil Willow checks on Angel behind her.
Willow: (penitently) I just can’t kill her.
Buffy: (regretfully) No. Me, neither.
Willow: (hesitantly) I mean, I know she’s not me. We have a big nothing
in common, but… still.
Buffy: (understandingly) There but for the grace of getting bit.
Willow: (resolutely) We send her back to her world, and she stands a
chance. It’s the way it should be anyway.
Giles: Uh, we’re about ready here.
Willow goes over to Evil Willow.
Giles: (to Anya, warningly) Don’t you try any tricks now, dear.
Anya: (sulkily) I don’t need tricks. (arrogantly contemptuous) When I
get my powers back, you will all grovel before me.
Both Willows roll their eyes and shake their heads at her delusions of
grandeur.
Giles: (unimpressed) Yes, uh, if you, uh, Willows, would like to, uh,
(gestures where they should kneel) complete the circle.
Willow faces Evil Willow for the last time.
Willow: Good luck. (helpfully) Try not to kill people.
Evil Willow doesn’t display any emotion, but Willow smiles warmly at her
and gives her a big hug. Evil Willow isn’t sure what to make of that,
but gets into the spirit and does some naughty touching. Willow jumps
back from her reach.
Willow: (shocked) Hands! Hands!
Evil Willow gives her a naughty, knowing smile. The two of them walk
over to join the circle. They kneel down as the camera pulls back. The
screen fades to white, and then returns to the ongoing fight in the
alternate universe. Evil Willow materializes and smiles, relieved to be
back in her own reality, only to be suddenly grabbed by Oz and shoved
back onto a broken piece of the wooden cage, effectively impaling her
through the heart.
Evil Willow: (miserably) Aw, f…
She explodes into ashes.
The screen flashes back to white and back to Sunnydale High. The camera
pans down to Willow and Buffy sitting together on a wall.
Buffy: You wanna go out tonight?
Willow: Strangely, I feel like staying at home… (sadly) and doing my
homework… and flossing… and dying a virgin.
Buffy: (sagely) You know, you can O.D. on virtue.
Willow: Between me and my evil self, I’ve got double guilt coupons. I
see now where the path of vice leads. I mean, she messed up everything
she touched. I don’t ever want to be like that.
Percy: (comes up to them, a bit nervous) Hey. Uh, hi.

Willow: Oh, hi. Listen, I didn’t have a chance…
Percy: (interrupts) Okay, so I did the outline for the paper on
Roosevelt. (hands it to her) It turns out there were two President
Roosevelts, so I didn’t know exactly which one to do, so I did both.
He hands her the other one. Both are nicely bound in folders. Buffy
gives Willow a knowing smile. Willow just stares at him in stunned
amazement.
Percy: (respectfully) Um, and I know they’re kinda, kinda short, but I
can flesh them out. Oh, and here’s the bibliography. (hands it to her)
Um, and I can retype that if you want. You just let me know what I did
wrong, and I’ll get on it.
Willow is speechless, amazed by his sudden change in attitude. He starts
to go, but comes back to lay an apple on the folders in her lap. He
leaves again, hopping athletically over a low wall.
Buffy: (innocently) You wanna go out tonight?
Willow: (hopefully) 9:00 sound good?

Marianne LeBlanc
Latest posts by Marianne LeBlanc (see all)